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Dildos & Vibrators

(115 Posts)
kickassangel Wed 06-Feb-13 00:56:12

OK - so in my class about Fraternity & Freemasons last night we ended up with the teacher telling us how the clitoris is the only part of a woman's body that has the nerve endings which will bring about an orgasm. That the vagina doesn't have the right amount of nerves. (Believe me, it made perfect sense for this to happen in a lecture on the history of 1800s freemasons.)

Anyway - my thought was - I get why penetrative sex exists, but WHY do sex shops sell dildos & vibrators?

I've never actually seen either in rl (yes, honestly), so maybe I'm missing something, but wouldn't it make more sense for there to be sex toys that stimulate the clitoris, not the vagina?

And yes, the obvious answer is that we're meant to need a man & his penis, so that's what we get sold.

Tortoiseonthehalfshell Wed 06-Feb-13 00:59:34

Vibrators stimulate the clitoris. They aren't usually penis-shaped, or at least they don't have to be; things like the Rabbit have a vibrating part that is designed to sit against the clit as well as the dildo bit.

Dildos exist because penetration feels nice. And there's nothing stopping one from having clitoral stimulation at the same time.

Tortoiseonthehalfshell Wed 06-Feb-13 01:00:10

You may find it educative to browse an online sex shop store.

wannabedomesticgoddess Wed 06-Feb-13 01:00:45

There are sex toys that stimulate the clitoris.

The way I see it (which could be wrong) is that sex is an inbuilt drive and pleasure can be gained from penetrative sex because that is what we are programmed to do.

I dont really think dildos are a feminist issue. But I am watching this thread with interest to see others opinions.

OldLadyKnowsNothing Wed 06-Feb-13 01:02:43

You've never heard of The Rabbit? Have a read. grin There are loads of vibrators to be used on the clitoris, and some women also have the G-Spot.

kickassangel Wed 06-Feb-13 01:28:51

In the same class we watched Animal House which has a comedy huge dildo which may have been influencing my views on this. I will not be doing any googling on this though as I use my laptop at school and don't want any unexpected adverts appearing on the smart board.

So are there any sex toys that are just for the clitoris? I'm wondering how accurate the lecture was. I def got the impression that PIV orgasms weren't the real deal

wannabedomesticgoddess Wed 06-Feb-13 02:33:26

There are cock rings that have a little thing on the top that stimulates the clitoris. Some may argue they pleasure the man too but IMO they are mainly for the clitoris.

Bullets are tiny vibrators that are designed for the clit too.

You could argue that some sex toys empower women. Pleasure without the need for a man!

OldLadyKnowsNothing Wed 06-Feb-13 02:47:05

Dear God (and I say that as an atheist, apologies if I've offended anyone) if you're relying on Animal House to educate you about your own sexuality, you really need to get down to your local library (since you're scared of online research) and do a bit of reading.

As wannabe says, the Bullet would work.

And any orgasm is "the real deal", however you get there.

I'm glad I recognise your name, or I'd be calling "hairy-handed trucker".

Tortoiseonthehalfshell Wed 06-Feb-13 02:50:48

^ This! I thought the same, including the name.

OP, please, I'm really shocked that you don't know this! Not that everyone NEEDS sex toys, but, you know. There's a whole world out there.

Vibrators are just for the clitoris. They vibrate against the clitoris. That's what they do, that's how they work. Some also include a penetrative bit, so you get more than one sensation.

I promise, I absolutely promise, that the sex toy industry is not entirely comprised of equipment made by men which fails to stimulate women due to a fundamental misunderstanding about clitoral vs vaginal orgasms!

OldLadyKnowsNothing Wed 06-Feb-13 03:02:22

If you're worried about previous searches appearing, and don't mind having to reacall all your passwords etc, it's worth having a look at Crap Cleaner, or C Cleaner as it's known these days. But do look at it carefully, it may not suit you at all.

OldLadyKnowsNothing Wed 06-Feb-13 03:04:04

Or just go to a local Anne Summers party, or shop.

madwomanintheattic Wed 06-Feb-13 03:04:53

Yes, yes, yes, all of that, but for the love of all that is good and holy, you HAVE to explain how the actual feck a lecture on the Freemasons ended up with clitoral stimulation.


Tortoiseonthehalfshell Wed 06-Feb-13 03:10:58

I'm guessing it went like this:

Freemasons good example of fraternity/men sticking together - Fraternities generally use rituals (eg freemason bollocks) to create sense of Togetherness - one of the other ways in which togetherness is fostered is by Othering those not in it, often women, so college frats will often do things like prank their new initiates into things like dressing up as women or playing with 'hilarious' sex toys (thus the Animal House dildo scene, not that I've seen it) - something about male norms being the default (?) so male constructs of sex and sexual pleasure are mainstream, took until relatively recently for people to even acknowledge that PIV sex is not the way to orgasm for most women despite women, you know, always having known that, yadda yadda nerve endings.


OldLadyKnowsNothing Wed 06-Feb-13 03:18:20

Hmm, see what you mean, tortoise, but Animal House was actually released in 1978 so a) it's ancient ( even I was young then) and b) it's utterly irrelevant to how women learn about their sexuality in 2013.

<revisits the hairy-handedness of the OP>

OldLadyKnowsNothing Wed 06-Feb-13 03:20:46

Unless the Op's lecturer was exploring the differences between then and now?

Tortoiseonthehalfshell Wed 06-Feb-13 03:26:55

I'm assuming it was just used as an example of fraternities and male bonding rituals? Not as a direct cause of misunderstandings of sexuality.

OldLadyKnowsNothing Wed 06-Feb-13 03:36:33

Ah, male-bonding rituals, yes. Get you there. And at this point, I sign out and go to bed. Will be interested to see how/if this thread develops, thanks to the OP for starting it.

Booyhoo Wed 06-Feb-13 03:37:55


i'm amazed at a woman not knowing about the g-spot and clitoral stimulators!

OldLadyKnowsNothing Wed 06-Feb-13 03:45:21

Well, it depends on the OP's history and background, not to mention age and experience. And now I really am crashing.

kickassangel Wed 06-Feb-13 04:18:06

Ok, not a hairy handed trucker. I've been here a decade and not name changed so easy to search me.

Horribly I'll educated and lacking in experience. I went to a church school and had the kind of parents who never mentioned sex. Ever.

So I had some sexual experience before marriage but not a whole lot and there wasn't even a sex shop where I grew up.

Just that the brief moment that we touched on the topic sounded like it was only the clot that gave a real O and that left me thinking so what is the point of a dildo then? Surely so many of them wouldn't be sold if they weren't hitting the spot. You'll all be glad to know that I had the good sense to sTFU in my lecture and decided that here was a much better place to ask than in a roomful of teenagers.

How we got onto it was the use of secrecy to make masonry seem exciting, and how men created the secrets. In contrast women and their bodies were the secret. Which led onto male ignorance about female clitoris.

Anyway, I am not sufficiently interested to actually try going out and buying stuff. It is a small town here. It has been known for me to come out of the pub and be seen by students I teach (and the shower at the gym). I just couldn't cope if they saw me within ten feet of a sex shop.

Please, do NOT cyber stalk me and send any interesting packages to my house. You would not be doing me a favor (images of brown paper vibrating penis shaped parcel sitting on my front porch, and that's not a euphemism)

Tortoiseonthehalfshell Wed 06-Feb-13 04:22:10

Aw, bless you kickass. I promise not to cyberstalk you and send you sex toys, because eewwwwww creepy.

Mitchy1nge Wed 06-Feb-13 11:03:48

weird, was going to start similar-ish thread about whether NHSvibrators would be scary after reading this article discussing masturbation on prescription shock

MechanicalTheatre Wed 06-Feb-13 12:11:10

I think vibrators (which are predominantly for the clitoris) are probably the more widely-used toy compared to dildoes.

And women CAN have vaginal orgasms.

IThinkOfHappyWhenIThinkOfYou Wed 06-Feb-13 12:17:34

A dear friend of mine informs that there are 12 'spots' that induce orgasm.

iirc around 3 are inside the vagina (g spot, a spot a cervix)

Mitchy1nge Wed 06-Feb-13 12:23:17

12? Like the apostles?

I don't think I have a g spot sad

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