Can I just scream somewhere people will feel my rage!(25 Posts)
Went swimming with DD2 (18 months) today. Getting her dressed, we were playing a game where she pretended to be a dinosaur, doing big roars. I said 'Oh, are you a dinosaur' . She said "T-Rex" with a big grin.
Other mother says "Oh, does she have an older brother too?", pointing to her baby son. I say, "no, a sister, why?" with a smile. Woman looks confused. It only hit me as I walked away why she was asking.
I was dino mad when I was little. In those days you couldn't buy any clothes that weren't for boys with dinosaurs on. (my mum bought them for me and I was mistaken for boy a number of times)
I really thought attitudes would change after 30 years.Why on earth do people assume they are just for boys?
I suppose the two sides of the equation are, women are socialised to behave and think in certain ways, men are socialised to behave and think in certain ways.
Women are often the primary carers of young children, it's enough to make you scream that nothing much has changed in the last 30 years or so. When you meet a Dinosaur mother (one that should have gone out with the ark along with with pay gaps and page 3 ) you wonder what can be done. The fact that women say such stupidly sexist things proves we have a long way to go. < joins in the screaming> I liked dinosaurs and tree climbing, in fact I think if anything childhood was less segregated along sex lines than it is now. No one commented as I remember.
I was dino-crazy too! DD (2) loves wearing her dino mask and rarring at people. Luckily she has only had people make good remarks
Ds has this Elephant called Ellie, she's a girl. DS likes to make up elaborate stories, Ellie is a superhero who really kicks ass and sees off baddies, whilst the other character (a mouse) called Bob stays home to look after babies.
StickEmUp - It is disturbingly common to associate dinosaurs with boys. Another mother said to me at the library (as the two DD's fought over a dinosaur book) "Who says only boys like dinosaurs". I know she was trying to say the stereotype was rubbish, but she still recognised it.
Thanks for supporting my ranting. Love the sound of your son's toys Mini
Interestingly, was just discussing this with DH. Neither could figure out when or especially why dinosaurs became seen as a "boys thing." I'm at least a decade before WowOoo and I honestly don't remember dinosaurs, fossils or anything like that being seen as a "boy thing." Same goes for pirates. Even princesses weren't all pervasive for girls like they seem to be now. Ugh.
So often, I think we tend to believe a thing has always been the way it is, but that ain't always so.
Anyone here every have a pet rock? Got a photo somewhere of me with mine. Yeah, I know!
ooh, KRITIQ! I had a pet rock! That brings back some memories!
My DD isn't into dinosaurs, but MASSIVELY into fire engines, fire helicopters, anything to do with the fire service. Of course, it's all in the boy's section and people keep trying to tell her she shouldn't be interested in it. I ignore it all and have bought her a lovely helmet and helped her build a training tower out of lego...
KEITIQ--my DS had pet rocks, he used to sleep with them under his pillow every night and transfer them to the pockets of which ever clothing he was wearing
They have started making lego sets in pink! why? Pink castles, pink houses and cars. I find it odd. Although last week in the lego shop Ds was building people and talking about character and plot whilst the girl next to him was building a car.
We were in a restaurant the other day when someone referred to our "boys". Dd was wearing a green jumper with aeroplanes on. Other than that she actually looks very 'girly' (sorry but ykwim). Long hair, sparkly slide in etc. Stereotypes are embedded.
Kritiiq, my gender-dinosaur-anecdote is from 1976, if that helps? My brother was being interviewed for prep school; being two years younger I was lugged along as well. He was (still is) quite shy, so apparently I kept jumping in and answering his questions for him, especially on dinosaur names, my mother says. The gender assumption bit: the Headmaster said it was such a pity I wasn't a boy.
I am surprised by what we associate as male, my dd had a super cute cute romper when she was about a year and half covered in retro airplanes.
People always thought she was a boy why are planes and trains for boys? And cars? Girls cant drive?
Why no rainbows and hearts on boy stuff, boys don't like rainbow..little boys fucking love rainbows! Heart symbolize love, boys can't love?
I know one woman who has 3 kids, 2 older daughters and a baby boy. Her dh is in the army and served in Iraq, now that she has a boy she dresses him in camo all the time for his dad. Because little boys should like little war heroes right.
The ironic thing is her dh hates it. He sees camouflage (rightly imo) as a defensive weapon. He doesn't want to come back from Iraq and see his baby trussed up in gear that he uses to keep from dying.
Gender stereotyping really is detrimental to men at least as badly as it is to women, so I can't see why everyone isn't against it.
I was a kid in the 80s and while I think I was seen as a bit of a "tomboy" it still wasn't commented on nearly as much as it is now. Being in to science and dinosaurs and animals was seen more as a general kid thing then
'Gender stereotyping really is detrimental to men at least as badly as it is to women, so I can't see why everyone isn't against it. '
Couldn't agree more.
I work with young children and their parents and gender stereotyping is alive and well and kicking I assure you. It is beyond depressing. I was running a course for parents this morning and we had 3 gender stereotype comments in about 15 minutes - 'boys don't listen', 'brothers and sisters fight a lot, especially boys', 'boys love trains'. FFS. I will be putting them straight on a thing or two next week I can tell you (in a nice way of course)
I've decided that next time I hear a comment about how boys love running and jumping and climbing etc, I'm going to remind them of Jessica Ennis and how sad it would have been if she had never had opportunities to run and jump and get strong when she was younger.
One more point for the timeline - DS plays with some of my late-70s-era Duplo when we go to visit Grandma. She's still got some of the boxes, and the pictures of the children playing have boys and girls, more or less uniformly clad in turtlenecks and trousers. The only clue is the hair length, really.
Friend with 2 DDs always telling me (2 DSs) about how rowdy boys are. Her DDs are anything but quiet and demure but she doesn't seem to see it. << Knocks head against brick wall, or frozen snow which is to come later. >>
Can I share in your rage? I was shopping for a present for new great nephew yesterday and found a set of lovely red babygrows, some patterned, some plain. Except that one of the plain ones had a little badge on saying "little lady" (urgh, would have put me off for a girl too). Oh, and they had hearts on, which it didn;t occur to me were intended for girls cos DS frequently draws them on cards for his friends. If the marketers get their way, there won't be any neutral colours/designs left.
Dp reckons ds (8 weeks old) should do ballet because it's excellent all over exercise.
I'm looking forward to this in a couple of years <evil>
DH has said that about both DS and DD. I said I didn't particularly want DD doing it )she has never asked to) as I (possibly stereotypically) associate it with being ultra thin and eating disorders. DH said "have you seen how muscly they are?"
I would have loved DSs to do ballet. DS2's old nursery used to have a ballet dancer come in to dance with them. Even took him to a few lessons. He watched but would not participate. But then it was the same with football.
My mum still attends classes (at 64) and i have sporadically through my adult life. We reckon he'd benefit from martial arts (dp's hobby) so will give him the chance to do both when he's big enough.
I'm going to have fin with the other parents though <bwahahahaha>
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