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Chickens are lesbians

(25 Posts)
Mydogsleepsonthebed Wed 26-Sep-12 06:07:33

According to my 10 year old. And it made me think how I just might be doing something right. I'm probably not articulating this very well. But in the context of a conversation I realised that she totally accepts peoe regardless of sexual orientation. I was a bit proud of myself that some of what I bang on about is obviously going in. Or something.

"Mummy since boy chickens don't have willies does that mean all chickens are basically lesbians like Jane's mums?"

(I did laugh at the notion she had conjured in her head though. In the light of the other recent thread does that make me lesophobic?)

Mydogsleepsonthebed Wed 26-Sep-12 06:08:15


Phone and fat fingers. blush

Mydogsleepsonthebed Wed 26-Sep-12 12:09:13

Shameless bump

EldritchCleavage Wed 26-Sep-12 13:35:32

Boy chickens don't have willies?

Mydogsleepsonthebed Wed 26-Sep-12 13:43:16

I had to google. They don't. Which seemed ironic. Given that a boy chicken is a cockerel. With no cock.

FrothyDragon Wed 26-Sep-12 13:45:34

There's more on it, here.

EldritchCleavage Wed 26-Sep-12 13:48:32

Well, I'm shocked to the core! Never knew that. Thank you MDSOTB's DD, you've taught me something I should have known before!

Mydogsleepsonthebed Wed 26-Sep-12 13:59:40

I didn't know either. I had to google. She's doing a project at school. They got to pick the subject. She would love chickens but I am a meanie and I don't allow them. She's a bit obsessed wink

Tamoo Wed 26-Sep-12 14:04:00

Get her some chickens Mydog. They are wonderful pets, really funny and sweet and characterful. Also a lot more intelligent than people give them credit for. I had some as a kid and I've got such happy memories. Sadly now I live in a town and the nearest chicken is in pieces in my freezer sad

TiggyD Wed 26-Sep-12 14:08:00

"They have a sperm glob on their vent and will try to put it on the vent of the hen."

I wish I hadn't read that.

Mydogsleepsonthebed Wed 26-Sep-12 14:11:51

I'm in a town. So I don't think the neighbours would be too pleased. grin

But I don't know if I can articulate this. It was the matter of fact, no drama way she said "chickens are lesbians" that it was no big deal. Which it isn't. But my ex is absolutely everything a-phobic so I'm always trying to push against the messages he's sending or something. Oh I don't know. I'm tying myself in mental knots.

<gives up and head explodes>

Tamoo Wed 26-Sep-12 14:14:26

Are you saying that your ex is lesbianophobic?

Mydogsleepsonthebed Wed 26-Sep-12 14:16:12

Absolutely. And homophobic. And racist. And every other sort of phobic you can't think of.

Mydogsleepsonthebed Wed 26-Sep-12 14:16:56

Damn phone. CAN THINK OF.

Can I have wine yet?

TeiTetua Wed 26-Sep-12 15:52:14

It isn't a totally mad idea, though there don't seem to be any reports of domestic chickens rejecting cocks:

IdCalUaCuntBtUvNtGotTheDepth Wed 26-Sep-12 20:31:33

Sorry but I actually snorted at "Mummy since boy chickens don't have willies does that mean all chickens are basically lesbians like Jane's mums?" grin nice to know that your dc havent picked up on your ex's unfortunate ideas.

Horrified by the idea of chicken vent sex..eurgh. Will add to the "shit I didn't know about until mumsnet and wish i still didn't" thread now.

Mydogsleepsonthebed Wed 26-Sep-12 20:36:37

IdCal - I did too grin

And then I was worried that was lesophobic

IdCalUaCuntBtUvNtGotTheDepth Wed 26-Sep-12 20:54:38

I am sure laughing at weird shit that comes out of kids mouth's is not anything phobic and an one of the few rewards we get for breeding grin

KRITIQ Wed 26-Sep-12 22:19:40

I think kids are alot more chilled about stuff like this than many grown ups! They often ask really obvious questions, but they also don't have all the hang ups most of us have taken on board.

Heck, I remember in kindergarten nearly all the boys had paired up (and there were only 3 girls in the class, but we didn't opt for a menage a trois! smile ) and planned to get married when they got older. Not an eyelash was batted, even in the mega conservative community where I lived.

Tamoo Thu 27-Sep-12 11:08:40

That's sweet kritiq. We've got the opposite problem at DS's school where "gay" is commonly used as a crushing insult sad

Back to the sexuality of chickens, not a very nice story but when I used to keep them we had one hen who looked different to the others (she was a game bird hen) and for some reason our young cockerels used to gang rape her (literally, not exaggerating). She became very listless after a while as if she was ill or depressed. We rehomed the cockerels and she got better. I can't explain why they behaved like that with her, the only thing that set her apart was that she looked a bit different. I've always wondered why they did it.

Frans1980 Mon 01-Oct-12 12:00:18

From the site linked above:
"Usally hens are not interested and just walk off. If a rooster feels like he just has to mate with a stubborn hen, he will chase her down. If he is fast enough to catch her, he will grab on to some feathers just below her comb and climb on."

So if a rooster wants to mate with a female who isn't interested he just chases her down and rapes her??

MrsTerryPratchett Tue 02-Oct-12 00:20:25

I met (well saw) some lesbian albatrosses in NZ. It was all very sad because they kept sitting on infertile eggs which never hatched. Now I read that they are raising a chick.

Devora Tue 02-Oct-12 00:54:05

I always suspected so. It's that glint in their eye.

CuttedUpPear Sat 06-Oct-12 11:53:21

You mean that cocks don't have cocks?

Uppercut Sat 06-Oct-12 12:46:17

"So if a rooster wants to mate with a female who isn't interested he just chases her down and rapes her??"

Yes, forced copulation occurs frequently in non-human species, for example dolphins are known to engage in their equivalent of gang-rape[1]. They've also been known to try and rape humans too. Infanticide, or 'family annhilation' as some call it, is also a well-documented dolphin practice [2]. Those re-runs of Flipper will never look the same, who, IIRC, committed suicide. Yep, dolphins can do that too.

Of course, seriously applying human legal terminology to animals is silly; compared to humans the level of control they have over their actions is neglible at best.

1) Connor, Richard C, et al, "Patterns of Female Attractiveness in Indian Ocean Bottlenose Dolphins".

2) I. A. P. Patterson, et al, "Evidence for infanticide in bottlenose dolphins: an explanantion for violent interactions with harbour porpoises".

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