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3 year old and pyjama party leaves me uneasy

(38 Posts)
PenguinsAreThePoint Wed 05-Oct-11 22:03:35

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

bigbadbarry Wed 05-Oct-11 22:07:44

My DD's primary school has "treat day" from time to time where the class is allowed to choose something fun as a reward. One of the most popular right through infants was to come to school in their PJs/slippers/dressing gowns, with teddies, and watch DVDs smile Nothing sexy or spin the bottly involved, and lots of proper flannel pyjamas.

ChippingIn Wed 05-Oct-11 22:11:17

Penguins - have a nice cup of tea and stop over thinking this. In the nicest possible way, it is not a feminist issue. I don't know why you think it's 'too adult' that just doesn't compute to me, kids wear PJ's, they think it's fun to wear them to nursery for a change... it's not a big deal. Truely.

SingingSands Wed 05-Oct-11 22:14:01

You WHAT??!!

I think you should shake these ideas out of your head right now. Every child, regardless of being female or male, goes to bed, usually in pyjamas. If anyone is "sexualising" this, it's you, these ideas are in YOUR head.

I'm actually really gobsmacked by your post. Kids love pyjama days, mine have done it at nursery and primary school and it's all gone down a storm, turning up in jammies and dressing gowns instead of uniform is FUN!

You've made me really cross!

dyzzidi Wed 05-Oct-11 22:14:35

At dd's nursery they used to do this as it was generally the cheapest form of dress up for parents as it was something all of the children already had. The kids liked wearing something they were not normally allowed out of the house wearing.

BertieBotts Wed 05-Oct-11 22:19:18

I remember going to a pyjama party when I was about 7 - it was just a slightly "silly" theme, kids love that kind of inversion of the norms (DS finds it hysterically funny if you try to put his sock on his head). I don't remember noticing any extra differences between girls and boys than there would have been normally (ie I don't think any boys turned up in nighties or wearing pink!) I think you are overthinking this too. The "sexy" meaning of the phrase "pyjama party" is definitely a secondary one in my mind.

BertieBotts Wed 05-Oct-11 22:22:39

Also, the first I ever heard of "spin the bottle" was in a "Tales of the Riverbank" videotape we had, where the animals have a birthday party, decide to play spin the bottle, spin it, and then say... er... what are we supposed to do now? Does anybody know? Oh well, let's just spin it again!" Truth or dare etc, or other versions of spin the bottle I didn't encounter until later. This might have been in the 90s but I don't think things are that different now. When we first did play truth or dare in Primary school it was all really innocent stuff. The racy dares came later blush

timetosmile Wed 05-Oct-11 22:23:15

our infants school had a pyjama day for children in need...it was just the sweetiest thing to see them careering around the playground in fluffy dressing gowns and Clarkes black shoes!
They had a great day of fun, and that's what it was, BertieBotts is right..it's just funny because its not normal, there's really no 'adult' overtones to it.

piprabbit Wed 05-Oct-11 22:25:36

The children wear PJs and dressing gowns, the staff wear PJs and dressing gowns.

The children have a whale of a time because they don't usually get to wear night clothes during the day and because they see the nursery staff out of uniform.

The girls who usually wear pink glittery T-shirts will wear pink glittery PJs. The girls who wear usually wear primary colours will wear similar PJs. The boys will wear PJs that look remarkably like the T-shirts they usually wear (IME they are usually pretty interchangable).

Nothing sinister at all.

KRITIQ Wed 05-Oct-11 22:28:26

I don't really see a pyjama party as necessarily being sexualised, although yes, it will probably involve girls wearing fluffy pink princess nightwear and boys un uber active superhero jim jams. Ah, in my day, we'd have all been in primary colour flannel jammies . . . but I digress.

When I was 6 or 7, we had a school Christmas play that involved some of the class wearing pyjamas as costume (not me - for some strange reason, I was a Hungarian peasant, but that's a long story . . . ) I don't think most wore what they actually wore to bed though.

Like a Christmas in July or a January beach party theme, yes, it's the doing-something-a-bit-odd-but-fun bit that means they'll enjoy it.

exoticfruits Wed 05-Oct-11 22:28:39

I know a whole primary school who had night clothes for 'Children in Need'(including teachers). I don't see why you have a problem with it-you don't even need to ge them dressed in the morning! No one can complain that they haven't got anything or haven't got time etc.

HoneyPablo Wed 05-Oct-11 22:32:23

Oh dear.
It's got nothing to do with feminism or sexualising children.
It's actually about having fun in a way that EVERYONE can take part it. Everyone has pyjamas of some sort-it's meant to be inclusive.
You are over-thinking it way too much and are projecting your own values to make it into an issue when there is no issue there at all.

ceebeegeebies Wed 05-Oct-11 22:37:43

Blimey, you are really over-thinking this! My DC's nursery tend to do this every Children In Need and I am so grateful for them as PJ's are SO much easier than having to make/create a costume for a particular theme!!

It is cute, the kids love it...what is there not to like?

In fact, Children In Need fell on DS2's 1st birthday so he went to nursery on his birthday in his PJ's...so all his birthday photos (before and after nursery) have him wearing his PJ's and it makes him look like he didn't get dressed all day (which he didn't grin) which I think made his 1st birthday kind of special!

exoticfruits Wed 05-Oct-11 22:44:37

MN can always be relied upon to over think things!

exoticfruits Wed 05-Oct-11 22:46:21

I am surprised that anyone dare say or run anything because it will be criticised, but if they don't do anything they will be boring!

exoticfruits Wed 05-Oct-11 22:47:37

I bet the nursery just thought 'what can we do for fun that doesn't cost, doesn't involve effort and mums can't maon about'! (they were wrong!)

exoticfruits Wed 05-Oct-11 22:47:55

moan

CaptainNancy Wed 05-Oct-11 22:48:41

<<disclaimer: I am someone who disapproves of nail varnish on small children because I think it's sexualising>>
However I do not think that a pyjama day is sexualising young children at all- almost all little children wear pyjamas- I think they see it as something normal, and see the day as a topsy-turvy day IYSWIM.

BTW- neither of my children have princesses nor Ben 10 on their pyjamas hmm

PenguinsAreThePoint Wed 05-Oct-11 22:50:27

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

piprabbit Wed 05-Oct-11 23:05:33

I expect your DD has played games where she puts her food bowl on her head and then laughs when you pull a silly shock face. Or finding it funny when she has her T-shirt on back to front. Or giggling when you jokingly wear her hat on your head. They are all very similar sorts of play.

BertieBotts Wed 05-Oct-11 23:09:56

I don't think that pyjamas are that private TBH - if they were having a sleepover (which I realise is not the norm until they are older!) they'd see each other in their PJs. I'd be happy to wear PJs in front of visitors - I'd probably have to dig some out as I usually sleep naked, but still! - the only reason we don't usually wear them outdoors is because it keeps them cleaner and softer not to be exposed to the elements, really. And they would be cold. But not because they are inherently private, in my opinion anyway.

PenguinsAreThePoint Wed 05-Oct-11 23:10:38

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

RIZZ0 Wed 05-Oct-11 23:16:40

Words fail.

Maryz Wed 05-Oct-11 23:17:32

Penguins, irrelevant to the op, but I know a boy called Pip (short for Philip). He is so embarrassed by his name that when he changed schools he begged his parents not to tell the new school they called him Pip.

He is now Phil to all his friends, and if anyone who knew him before says Pip he goes bright red and walks away.

SazZaVoom Wed 05-Oct-11 23:23:14

My DD's only tend to get to wear 'character' stuff - Hello Kitty/Peppa Pig etc as underwear and nightwear as i loathe it. They would LOVE to show it off to their friends. TBH a t-shirt & trousers is exactly the same as PJ's so i can't see the problem confused

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