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Telling someone not to leer at you makes you a hypocrite, apparently...

(8 Posts)
HoldMeCloserTonyDanza Wed 22-Jun-11 14:16:40

I just really need to vent.

Was added by a guy I knew (and dated briefly, to my eternal shame - I was only 16 in my defence) on FB two days ago. He just posted "to the woman breastfeeding in the cafe - wouldn't you stare if I whipped it out and took a lovely, natural leak on the table."

Fucking cock.

He has just got a ton of comments MOSTLY but not entirely telling him he's a twat. So he clarifies - oh his problem isn't with breastfeeding, it's just that the woman should expect to be stared at if she's going to feed, and if she doesn't like the attention she's a hypocrite to complain about it - because complaining only draws more attention to her.

So if someones leering at you, shut the fuck up and take it, you have no right to complain.

ARGH I am just so angry. I am just going to unfriend, I can't actually bring myself to comment because I'm so upset. Good for that woman for standing up for herself. When I was new to feeding I avoided leaving the house out of fear of incidents like this. That's what the patriarchy wants. Stay out of sight, cover up, you have no right to complain if you get harassed. Christ.

Sorry just needed to let it out. Fucking wanker.

HoldMeCloserTonyDanza Wed 22-Jun-11 14:19:51

I should really call him up on it but I just get so angry and shaky I can't.

What a fucking cock.

queenofthecapitalwasteland Wed 22-Jun-11 14:40:16

You're right to be angry. I've not been there myself but when my sis was BF in a public area she would hide herself in a corner and do everything possible to hide what she was doing, it almost seemed comical to me but I understood her reasons.

Does he stare at women in swimming pools and beaches and expect them not to say something? Does he grope women in pubs/ clubs as that's obviously what they're there for? Sadly I would guess it's a yes to all of those, and it means that he's a problem for all women around him. winds down

Please send this idiot a message before you un-friend him, I'm glad the majority of people think he's an idiot but it might help you to add your voice.

wrongdecade Wed 22-Jun-11 14:55:29

erm, yes becasue pissing on a cafe table is comparable to breastfeeding hmm

I hope he's actually been hitting a crackpipe it might make his views more plausible.

LRDTheFeministNutcase Wed 22-Jun-11 15:39:35

It feels to me increasingly as if anything women do can be construed as hypocritical and attention-seeking ... both those terms seem to get flung around almost as frequently as the old cliche 'hysterical'. It's just another way of saying 'how dare this woman take her attention of me and my penis and have an opinion that doesn't a sycophantic repetition of my own?'

Isn't it strange how, with all the women's boobs in plain sight you get in teh media, you'd think people would be desensitized but instead this man must be super-alert for the slightest glimpse of boob ... how little sex do we think he's having?!

HoldMeCloserTonyDanza Wed 22-Jun-11 16:33:24

Thanks folks. I've calmed down a bit now.

The thing is the way he's phrased it is to make it clear that his problem is with someone sticking up for themselves and criticising him. If he had just stuck to being anti-breastfeeding that would actually be easier to handle. But he felt himself losing the argument so it was turned around into a problem with women being too shouty. So if you have a go at him you're just proving his point.

God bless feminism because before I'd never have been able to figure out and articulate this bullshit.

HerBeX Wed 22-Jun-11 19:36:29

Ah uppity women.

Men like him hate them

aliceliddell Wed 22-Jun-11 19:47:07

Yes HerBeX, and we hate them right back. There are no circumstances in which they will not say whine 'What about the men?'.

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