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Am I being oversensitive?

(36 Posts)
Pootles2010 Wed 08-Dec-10 13:32:12

Just seen the East Riding of Yorkshire Police's Christmas Campaign - the strapline is 'let your hair down, not your guard', with a line underneath 'Alcohol features in two thirds of all rapes'. This makes me quite uneasy, not sure if it should? What are others thoughts on it?

scurryfunge Wed 08-Dec-10 13:36:37

It is fact that alcohol features in sexual assaults but that goes for the offender too.

I don't like the emphasis on the victim having to be careful. I would prefer something along the lines of "Oi, fellas, don't get so pissed you don't care whether someone is consenting or not".

ToyBoat Wed 08-Dec-10 13:39:06

Yes, it pisses me off too. If they're going to have posters saying 'be careful not to get raped' they shoudl have ones saying 'don't rape women' as well. Just like they have 'be careful not to make it easy for thieves to nick things out of your car' as well as ones saying 'CCTV here - don't trespass' etc.

I've never seen a sign saying 'don't rape'.

ChateauDeLaShite Wed 08-Dec-10 13:42:30

Agree. Basically implies 'you've been told, so if you get pissed and then raped it's your own fault'

SantaIsMyLoveSlave Wed 08-Dec-10 13:42:35

I've never seen a sign saying "don't nick things out of cars", though. Or the equivalent for pretty much anything other than traffic offences or child abuse (counting the NSPCC's Full Stop campaign there).

"CCTV here" covers pretty much anything illegal you might be thinking of doing. And I think it's a legal requirement to put up a sign if you have a CCTV camera, too.

Pootles2010 Wed 08-Dec-10 13:43:11

To be fair the policewoman in the interview (in local paper) did say it was about women not making themselves vulnerable, but also about men realising that women must be sober enough to consent... I just think there's traces of the old attitude of women 'asking for it'.

MadreInglese Wed 08-Dec-10 13:48:16

tbh with a 20 year old sister who regularly scares me to death by going out and getting so ratarsed she can't remember where she put her phone/how she got home/who she was dancing with I think it's a welcome warning to women who are planning on boozing away the festive season

of course they're not 'asking for it' but it doesn't hurt to be a little cautious and not make yourself unneccessarily vulnerable

if seeing that add makes one girl have one or two less drinks, which in turn keeps her 'sober' enough to wait for a taxi home rather than think she's safe to walk, then is a good thing IMO

ToyBoat Wed 08-Dec-10 13:57:37

There are often signs in shops saying 'shoplifters will be prosecuted'.

Ephiny Wed 08-Dec-10 13:59:39

I think it's good advice for everyone, men and women, to not get so drunk you're not in control of yourself, or likely to do stupid things, or not able to get home safely.

Wouldn't have liked that poster though, smells of victim-blaming to me.

Pootles2010 Wed 08-Dec-10 14:01:16

I see what you mean Madre, but it isn't very fair just to have everything aimed at the victim is it? Like the others say, there should be an accompanying ad for men to think about not getting so drunk / or to consider whether a woman is sober enough to consent.

MadreInglese Wed 08-Dec-10 14:08:24

But it's about general awareness, like someone else said, it may make a guy think seriously about whether a woman is sober enough to consent

(but I can't imagine anyone intent on committing a premeditated crime would change their mind because of a poster)

They are aimed at the victims of crime, not because they are to blame, but because sometimes you can take steps yourself to reduce the likelihood of becoming a victim of crime

snowflake69 Wed 08-Dec-10 14:37:31

When a lot of women go out they get so drunk they dont know what they are doing. It is worse for women than men as most women get drunk easier.

When I go out it is usually females that are so drunk they cant get up, dont know where they are, lost all their stuff, fell down the stairs, lying in the street in alleys etc so I suppose it is just warning them not to get too lairy.

We have people on the streets here who help the women who get too hammered get home as it is such a big problem in my area. They pay for taxis and everything if they need to. They also ring cabs or ring friends to help the women who are that drunk.

notjustapotforsoup Wed 08-Dec-10 14:43:39

Gotta be careful about falling down drunk in case a man trips up over you and his cock ends up in your vagina by accident.

snowflake69 Wed 08-Dec-10 14:49:13

Well you wouldnt leave your front door open and go down town if you lived in a busy area. I just see it the same as that. Yeah people shouldnt rape, steal, murder etc but there will always be a small proportion of people that do so best to stay safe.

You are more likely to be safe if you get a taxi home and know where you are and where you are going, than if you are in a bikini top and hot pants, lost all your stuff, have no idea where you are going and try sleeping outside half naked whilst paraletic etc.

scurryfunge Wed 08-Dec-10 14:56:11

snowflake -you are more at risk from the man in the taxi in your scenario than anything else. Clothing has bugger all to do with being safe.

People do not need to be told to take basic safety precautions in an advert. It is common sense - better to have the emphasis on the wrongdoer, not the victim.

snowflake69 Wed 08-Dec-10 15:01:33

It might be common sense to some but how come hardly anyone listens to the advice. I know I dont, I dont know many people that do and thats why everyone ends up getting that hammered week after week. Its ok if you have decent mates/partner etc but what if you get left.

I see loads of women in that state every week and have been in that state countless times. I know when reading things like this its probably is a bit silly now but never thought about it really. I only think about it now that I have a child myslef.

I know none of my friends ever think about it either. You never think anything will happen to you

notjustapotforsoup Wed 08-Dec-10 15:02:51

Unless you are in a taxi with someone like Worboys for a driver.....

snowflake69 Wed 08-Dec-10 15:13:46

I think the poster is just trying to make you think about things. In our area it is a lot of low income people so everyone gets drunk in the house and then goes out. It involves mixing a lot of drinks, drinking fast then going out etc. I do think it has an effect and that a lot of people, predominantly women dont always think about it. I have done it myself loads been ok one minute then absolutely ridiculous the next.

I have a friend that got so drunk she woke up on my settee, she had no idea how she got there, where her stuff was including bank card, phone, passport, house keys. She couldnt remember hardly any of the night or getting back. The poster is aimed at trying to make people think about getting that drunk. I personally dont think it will work though, as drinking is just to engrained in our culture for it ever to change.

scurryfunge Wed 08-Dec-10 15:29:23

There isn't a specific problem with warning people about the dangers of drink.....it is linking that to rape and blaming the victim that is objectionable.

dittany Wed 08-Dec-10 18:06:47

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Unprune Wed 08-Dec-10 18:09:27

I think there was a campaign somewhere saying 'Men - don't be rapists'. I'll see if I can find it.

Unprune Wed 08-Dec-10 18:12:40

Hmm, I can't hmm
Figures.

dittany Wed 08-Dec-10 18:14:56

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

notjustapotforsoup Wed 08-Dec-10 18:40:36

Men: No consent means no sex. Go home and have a wank instead.

SantaIsAnAnagramOfSatan Wed 08-Dec-10 19:28:28

too pissed to say yes? don't have sex with her

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