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One in three South African men admit to rape

(42 Posts)
Prolesworth Fri 26-Nov-10 10:19:35

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Beachcomber Fri 26-Nov-10 11:52:19

Chilling is the word for it Prolesworth sad.

Thanks for posting this. We don't have anything much to fight this sort of stuff I suppose apart from awareness and a willingness to help/support the women concerned however they see fit.

Prolesworth Fri 26-Nov-10 11:53:54

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RibenaBerry Fri 26-Nov-10 13:29:00

God that's depressing. Even more so if you think that 39% of men thought you couldn't rape your wife. I wonder how many of them have actually raped their wife, and therefore how high the figures would be if that were included.

20% of men said that, in some rape cases, the woman wants it to happen. Er, no, that's pretty much the definition of it being a rape: she didn't want it to happen.

Mind you, the UK poll? 26% think it's your fault you are raped if you dress in revealing clothing? 30% if you are drunk. Good god. Do you ever hear people saying "it was his fault that he got attacked, mugged and beaten up, he was a bit drunk".

Sigh. I worry for my daughter...

ISNT Fri 26-Nov-10 13:37:46

Very shocking.

Also agree that it's not an "us and them" thing as if they did the same survey here the results would be pretty horrifying. It would be interesting to see how the questions were phrased - in a culture where sexual violence is quite normal many people don't see rape as rape IYSWIM. Happens here too.

OTOH ribena you do hear people saying that when people were attacked while drunk they were asking for it/vulnerable etc. The huge difference is that there is no stigma about telling people you have been mugged etc and there is no question that the police won't take it seriously.

Beachcomber Fri 26-Nov-10 13:38:06

Ah, got you now Proles, with regard to the UK too I mean.

ISNT Fri 26-Nov-10 13:38:55

May have got confused with a double negative there in my post confused but YKWIM

RibenaBerry Fri 26-Nov-10 13:52:00

ISNT - do you? I've heard people say you put yourself in a vulnerable position. And I've heard people say it was your own fault if you walked out in front of a car or started a fight. But never that someone was to blame for being mugged/beaten up because they were drunk.

Agree about the stigma point. No one would ever suggest in those circumstances that there hadn't been a crime.

ISNT Fri 26-Nov-10 13:57:14

Yes I do hear it, a lot. Or I used to (don't get out much these days!). I used to know a lot of heavy drinkers and a lot of people who have been beaten up/mugged, and certainly when things happened to "pissheads" it was no surprise/people would shrug etc.

RibenaBerry Fri 26-Nov-10 14:15:15

Sigh. That's sad too. Getting completely wasted is not a wise or safe idea for anyone - it is a dangerous world out there and it does make you vulnerable. Even leaving aside violence, I know someone who walked out in front of a taxi and was knocked down (thankfully not seriously hurt). But it depresses me the hositility we show to many victims of violence.

Rape is still in it's own category though isn't it. No one would say "no, your wallet wasn't stolen, you were drunk so it wasn't a mugging" the way they do with rape.

Prolesworth Fri 26-Nov-10 14:15:38

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ISNT Fri 26-Nov-10 14:19:15

ribena yes that's the fundamental difference I think.

RibenaBerry Fri 26-Nov-10 14:22:06

Prolseworth - the idea that you can't validy say no if you've been promiscuous is chilling isn't it? You've said yes to 10/20/100 men (what is promiscuous to these people?) and so when the 11th/21st/101st comes along you've automatically said yes.

Like the theory that you can't rape a prostitute.

8% actually believed that stuff.

frikonastick Fri 26-Nov-10 14:27:19

the main reason why vicitm blaming isnt as prevalent as you would imagine, is that there is practically no concept of there actually being a victim in rape. or that there is anything wrong with rape in the first place. no need to blame the victim if you arent ashamed of raping her in the first place.

smallwhitecat Fri 26-Nov-10 14:30:46

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MummyBerryJuice Fri 26-Nov-10 14:31:03

Fucking hell!

frikonastick Fri 26-Nov-10 14:32:12

yep.

frikonastick Fri 26-Nov-10 14:33:54

its even more horrific when you extrapolate it out to baby rape.

something that is COMMON in south africa. as in, happens every day.

Dolittlest Fri 26-Nov-10 14:35:43

Add the rampant spread of HIV in SA and the picture is even more depressing.

MummyBerryJuice Fri 26-Nov-10 14:35:47

Yup. It unfortunately is sad and angry.

Prolesworth Fri 26-Nov-10 14:36:09

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ZZZenAgain Fri 26-Nov-10 14:41:31

an older statistic I read on the BBC IIRC mentioned school boys surveyed in South Africa. I was shocked that I think it was 1-3 or even more classified gang rape as a fun activity.

Sakura Fri 26-Nov-10 14:41:55

baby rape sad sad sad sad

frikonastick Fri 26-Nov-10 14:44:15

oh sure, i mean, its not like men dont know that its ILLEGAL to rape. just that they dont care. and they dont see woman as being as 'real' as they, men are. so there isnt any reason to blame the victim. you would have to feel guilty first, right? or afraid of repercussions. of which there are none in south africa. so, no need to shift the blame.

ZZZenAgain Fri 26-Nov-10 14:48:37

yes sakura. The idea being you can cure yourself of AIDS by sex with a virgin, so therefore girls are targetted, the younger the better. Horrible

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