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How do I convince my GP to let me have a hysterectomy?

(61 Posts)
Crumpetsforthequeen Sun 24-May-20 00:57:59

I'm 30, have 2dc and had my tubes tied during last c-section with ds9 months, I have ehlers danlos syndrome (eds) and the most horendous periods.

I've always had bad, heavy, painful periods as a side effect from my EDS but as I've got older they are just ruining my body and life (dramatic I know) now I bleed for 10-14 days and it's so heavy I have to wear both a tampon and a pad but I soak through both within 30 minutes so I can't go anywhere for longer than that amount of time so I'm housebound, I feel disgusting and dirty even tho I shower very often and I get debilitating migraines for 4-5 days which in turn sets off my other condition, trigeminal neuralgia. I'm so run down by the end of it I spend the next 2 weeks trying to get my health up ready for it to happen all over again and don't even get me started on the cramps and joint pain. I'm miserable. My mental health is suffering so badly I can't continue like this anymore.

I've been to my GP multiple times to try to convince her to schedule me for a full hysterectomy, I'm fully aware of all that goes with it as it's something I decided I wanted since before I was pregnant with my son, another pregnancy would destroy my body hence the tied tubes but I need my periods and all that hell gone so this isn't a rash, hormonal decision. DH fully supports me and he can see how much I'm suffering, we've done a good 2 years of research and we are fully aware of complications and side effects but we both agree it's for the best.

However my GP has said I'm too young, I'll regret it and I've already had my tubes tied so what's the point in having a hysterectomy? hmm I said I'm not doing this for contraception I'm doing this because I am becoming extremely unwell and depressed.

To which her aggressive snapping reply was well I don't know what you want me to do about it then. (your job maybe? Just a suggestion) And put me on tranexamic acid but it's only lessened my flow by about 5% maybe? And its done nothing for anything else, I'm already on so many different types of meds for different things I don't want to keep introducing new stuff to 'see what happens' as its messing with my regular stuff and my body feels so delicate already one more new drug and it'll od itself.

Thank you for reading this far and I apologise for how long this post is but I've been a mumsnetter for almost 8 years now and you ladies are the best at getting shit done! How do I convince this womb loving GP to let me evict my baby maker?

Ps I can't see anyone else as its 'surgery bullshit policy'

HeddaGarbled Sun 24-May-20 00:59:53

Change surgery? Go private?

PastMyBestBeforeDate Sun 24-May-20 01:01:56

Can you ask to be referred to gynae to see about excessive periods or an ablation? It's less final than a hysterectomy but once you've been referred you can discuss options with them rather than the GP.

Whatifitallgoesright Sun 24-May-20 01:02:20

I'm determined not to be the one to say it. I know, it's facile. I'm not going to say it. I'm not (Sorry Ms Crumpets. Someone with more knowledge will be here soon. Ignore me)

ShinyFootball Sun 24-May-20 01:09:14

Same idea as me probably what if!

Anyway.

The attitude of many docs around women's reproductive healthcare is appalling, seen loads of threads like this.

Can you talk to a different GP at the practice?

Crumpetsforthequeen Sun 24-May-20 01:11:07

I've requested to be referred but she said they won't do any more for you than I'm doing and I live very rurally so no other surgeries for miles and I can't afford to go private. I want to put a complaint in as I don't feel she's working to my beneficence but I doubt it would do anything.

Go on whatifitallgoesright what are you (not) wanting to say? I'm curious now lol

Neveranynamesleft Sun 24-May-20 01:11:33

Awful beyond words. Can you not change your surgery and see a different doctor? Nobody should just have to put up with this situation in this day and age.

stopchewingeverything Sun 24-May-20 01:11:45

GPs should refer to Gynae teams for this. Ask for a referral and if the first doctor won't refer, see another.

ShinyFootball Sun 24-May-20 01:12:42

Are there no other GPs at your practice?

Neveranynamesleft Sun 24-May-20 01:13:52

Just seen your post about being rural. However, I would really look into going elsewhere regardless of the distance ! Please complain , her attitude is just not acceptable or helpful

Crumpetsforthequeen Sun 24-May-20 01:15:09

Once we're booked with one GP unless it's an emergency and they're not avaliable or they're on leave we have to only see that GP. It's stupid policy that everyone in the village complains about and it's been brought up in meetings I don't know how many time but it never changes

Hagisonthehill Sun 24-May-20 01:15:58

Push for a gynae referral .Everytime your gp says they can't help ask to be referred to someone who can.And go in every month when the bleeding is too much,you shouldn't need to but make refering you the easy option.

VanGoghsDog Sun 24-May-20 01:16:05

Write to the CCG outlining the issue and asking for their support to be referred.

I did this when my GP just wasn't listening and got the referral letter back within a week. Obviously the actual appointment took a bit longer to come through. Not the same issue, but also gynaecological.

VanGoghsDog Sun 24-May-20 01:18:45

Also, it's worth £200 of your own money to see the gynae privately, I did this first so I had the full details of what was needed. I saw the GP to ask for the name of the person to see privately.
Once you've seen them you don't have to stay in the private system, you can go back to the NHS.

Crumpetsforthequeen Sun 24-May-20 01:18:56

I think I might just go and free bleed in the reception whilst I write this letter lol

But thank you though that is a very good suggestion to write a letter to the CCG, I will look into first thing tomorrow

Hagisonthehill Sun 24-May-20 01:19:28

I think you could make excessive bleeding not helped by tranexamic acid an emergency next time she's off.

VanGoghsDog Sun 24-May-20 01:20:54

You can get more information across in a logical order in a letter I think. We all feel stressed and pressured in the GP surgery so forget things or get railroaded.

Neveranynamesleft Sun 24-May-20 01:21:03

You are well within your rights to complain, the practise should have their own complaints procedure, ask for a form. If theh dont, then go higher and complain about that ! . Glad I don't have to use that surgery.

mummykauli7 Sun 24-May-20 01:24:15

Hi. I'm so sorry you're going through this. I have Ehlers Danlos syndrome aswel and I totally understand what you're going through. If your gp won't refer you to gynaecology do you think they will at least refer you back to the doctor that diagnosed you? It might be beneficial to have this discussion with a doctor who actually understands EDS and then ask that doctor to refer you instead.

Alphablocs Sun 24-May-20 01:25:34

Could you use a contraceptive that stops periods?

Crumpetsforthequeen Sun 24-May-20 01:25:40

I can't believe I have had more suggestions, information and kindness from you ladies in the last 20 minutes since posting than in the last 6 months of seeing the GP

tiaraprincess Sun 24-May-20 01:26:23

Sorry to hear that you are having such a rough time and about your experience with the gp sad.
Just a thought, have you thought about getting the Mirena coil? It often completely stops periods.

sestras Sun 24-May-20 01:29:39

@Alphablocs getting a gp to prescribe a contraceptive for a woman who's sterile is near impossible.

sestras Sun 24-May-20 01:31:12

I know how you feel op. I've asked for a hysterectomy and am sterile myself.

Can't get the pill prescribed because I have a permanent method of contraception but won't refer on to gynaecologist because there's "no need"

Crumpetsforthequeen Sun 24-May-20 01:31:49

I had the coil a few years back and it made me bleed non stop for 8 months, as did the depo and the pill caused severe weight gain that affected my joints awfully, contraception is not my friend.

@mummykauli7 its awful isn't it? Thank you for understanding, unfortunately the specialist was visiting from London and I'm hundreds of miles away from there so that isn't an option.

I think I'm going to write the letter, make a formal complaint and demand to see someone else, well I will on Monday.

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