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Hi all, long time poster but name changed for this..!
From my first sexual encounter at 17, I have suffered from mild vaginismus. I am extremely tight, uncomfortably so.
I can't use tampons, and have never been able to 'relax' enough to insert a finger myself. Smear tests are a nightmare hence putting my last one off for a couple of years.
I'm 34 now, and have been with DP almost 6 years. He has always respected my needs, never pushed or insisted on anything. I love being close with him. For the last 6 months or so though it has been almost impossible, and certainly the last three months there's been no intercourse, we basically just give up because my muscles are so tight he can't get in (sorry if TMI). I try my best to relax, and I want to be intimate, but something is stopping it. It takes around 15 minutes for him to get about an inch in, by which point he is worried about hurting me and we usually just end up cuddling.
Lube doesn't make a difference.
I am at a total loss of what to do. He asked me a couple of days ago if I thought we'd ever have sex again.
Are there any online therapy courses or anything? I would go to the GP but read some awful stories about being told to just get on with it.
It's really affecting me now, and I don't know what to do!
Hi sorry to hear about this issue, when i first started having sex with my partner i was too scared and worried about the pain. I was tight too. I would always push him off. Took us a few months before my virginity finally broke.
Anyways during that time i spoke.to the docter who told me that i need to buy some dildos (different sizes) start of by using the smallest first. Make sure you use lube and just relax. Each time you succeed move on to next size up. This should help.
First few.times.i didnt like it. But i got used to it and got easier each time.
You can buy them from anne summers or search for them online x hope it helps