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To move house now, or not? WWYD

(8 Posts)
MrsExpo Mon 18-Jun-18 08:53:20

DH and I have been thinking about moving house for a while (I've posted about it before). We currently live in a biggish 4-5 bed detached in a nice location, but are thinking it's time to downsize. The idea would be to look for a 2-3 bed house or bungalow - easier to look after and we ought to be able to release some capital from the house to bolster our retirement fund (I'm 64, he's 71 - both retired). I'm totally on board with the moving idea, but the timing isn't great!!

DH is an isolated person who doesn't socialise much, and he's happy with that. However, I have a good network of friends around here, hobbies/hobby related clubs I'm involved with, do volunteering locally etc so have a busy and active life.

So ... the issue is, DH has recently been diagnosed with prostate cancer and is receiving treatment at a local hospital and at our GP surgery (monthly injections). He is due to have a 7 week course of radiotherapy later in the year - possibly September/October. His health isn't great, although he's getting on with life and doing all he can - gardening etc.

He is now really pushing to move. We've had one local agent round to look at the house - we didn't like them!! - and he wants me to get someone else in to value and then market the house. He's looking at properties locally, as well as further afield and doesn't think it would be a problem if we up sticks and move to another area 100 miles away. I think this isn't the time and we'd be better to wait til next year, when - hopefully - he will be done with his treatment and we'll be better placed to move on.

So, WWYD? Stay put or move now?

Singlenotsingle Mon 18-Jun-18 09:00:15

Surely his cancer treatment would be disrupted if you move away from the area?And the answer from your point of view as well has to be stay local. As far as timing is concerned, it's a long process to move house - if you put the house on the market now, you might not find you move until next year anyway.

JingsMahBucket Mon 18-Jun-18 09:04:14

I agree with the PP. I’d start decluttering and giving away items now with look towards moving in a year. I’d stay in the area though because you personally OP have your support network who will help you through the cancer diagnosis. DH benefits from that by proxy. Don’t go isolating yourself just because he’s naturally a hermit.

AnnabelleLecter Mon 18-Jun-18 09:16:55

The stress of treatment and moving would be too much.

Isadora2007 Mon 18-Jun-18 09:20:36

If he is pushing to move then encourage a decision that is mutually beneficial- a local downsize move only. That way you keep your support network but you have a more manageable home.

Solasum Mon 18-Jun-18 09:21:31

I am so sorry to hear of the diagnosis.

In the circumstances, I think you should stay in your current area. It is important that you both have the option of independent lives moving forward, you don’t want to be reliant on him for all entertainment.

Whether it makes sense to move really depends on whether you can get what you want where you are. If it will be easy to find somewhere, and to sell, maybe it is worth considering. Personally I’d be inclined to wait a year

UnexpectedItemInShaggingArea Mon 18-Jun-18 09:25:00

If he wants to move then preparing for it might be a welcome distraction (disclaimer: I know nothing about the effects of prostate cancer treatment).

Agree with PP. Start preparing by decluttering, doing little maintenance jobs etc. Get genned up on the local property market. Don't move 100s of miles away if you don't want to.

Maelstrop Thu 21-Jun-18 23:50:13

Can’t you stay in the same area? There must be smaller houses nearby. It’s all very well that he is fine to be isolated and without mate’s around him, but you sound like you’d like to stay near your friends.

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