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Ending a friendship

(13 Posts)
someonewhowonders Tue 13-Mar-18 12:15:50

Hi. I was wondering if anyone had ever sent a text message to a friend to end the friendship and what you wrote. The friend only seems to text me when she wants to diss about her husband but when I text her to have a vent about my junk, it's 99.9% of the time met with silence. I'm done with it. I talk to her at school pretty much every day every other fortnight due to her shifts and can time it so I don't see her but I need to plan carefully how I end this friendship without upsetting myself. Thanks for reading.

GinUnicorn Tue 13-Mar-18 12:17:31

Honestly I think it might be gentler to naturally drift apart. She will be hurt

someonewhowonders Tue 13-Mar-18 12:21:55

I don't think she'd be hurt at all which is why I dont want to upset myself if she just ignores me with whatever I put/say. It's not my nature at all to hurt her but I can't be ignored one day then spoken to as a convenience.

Bexter801 Tue 13-Mar-18 12:23:14

I don't think there's a need to send a text,if your texts are simply blanked,start doing the exact same.

SmashedMug Tue 13-Mar-18 12:32:12

Gentle ghosting is the easier option. As in you slowly stop replying. A text to end the friendship will just cause drama.

TalkinBoutWhat Tue 13-Mar-18 12:46:25

Just do to her what she does to you. If she doesn't respond to your texts, do the same to her texts.

If she asks why you didn't respond, just say 'oh, I just thought you were venting and didn't require a response'.

someonewhowonders Tue 13-Mar-18 12:47:04

Supposed to be meeting her and her family in a fortnight to take the kids trampolining for my sons birthday. Have already paid the balance for them all. Very worried she's gonna forget and be a no-show wasting £50+ for her kids. Now I feel like I can't text her for fear of being ignored. I don't want to prompt her either as I want it to be HER that remembers not me chasing. Again. If that makes sense.

Bexter801 Tue 13-Mar-18 13:06:32

Well maybe for the greater good(kids,and her family),you could send a reminder! Kids excited for party? Sort of text. Or just Leave it,if she can't make the effort to even reply,after you organising it all.

SmashedMug Tue 13-Mar-18 13:08:11

Text her to cancel that and take someone else or arrange some sort of refund. You don't have to wait around for her to decide for you.

Aprilmightmemynewname Tue 13-Mar-18 13:11:06

I ended a 7 year friendship by text I am afraid. She was so obsessed with her ex and it didn't sit right with me when all talks were within earshot of her dc (+mine). I wished her well for the future, asked that she didn't contact me so it didn't turn nasty, but for us to move on with our lives as non friends. Felt so so much happier, she had been draining me for a long time.

user1474652148 Tue 13-Mar-18 13:17:34

Cancel the birthday meet up and take someone else.
Slowly ease away by simply not replying as often and choose not to be available to meet up.
No need to cause upset and hurt just so you have closure.
Decide this friendship isn’t for you and let it die naturally

Meowstro Tue 13-Mar-18 13:21:17

If you suspect a no show, worst case scenario is either don't remind her and be prepared to waste £50+ or remind her and she doesn't come. She may come if you remind her but it sounds like that's best case scenario, just cancel and ask someone else - although if she finds out she'll justify in her mind that the end of the friendship was caused by you and overlook herself. Don't text her to end it, just stop responding if necessary but if she's silent with you, it probably won't happen.

someonewhowonders Tue 13-Mar-18 16:22:50

Thanks for the suggestions. Think I will ride it out now till trampolining day which is a week Sunday. Not gonna text her in between. I'll see her in the mornings when she takes her kids to their schools and she'll wave. Maybe I'm over reacting to this but the ignoring thing is repetitive and upsetting. She's always been good when I've seen her in person. Will wait and see what happens with the birthday thing then decide.

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