..about my dads will?(4 Posts)
My dad had many affairs when I was growing up and left my mum for one of the women when I was 21. About a week after the divorce from my mum came through he married her, and my sister and I had to clear out our rooms for her children. We are both in our 20s and it was probably time to get rid of a lot of the things we had growing up - however, it was still quite an emotionally charged situation as we were leaving our family home (actually it felt like we were being kicked out of our family home).
My dad is very much a woe-is-me kind of guy, so despite the fact that he has seriously hurt us and my mum, he sees himself as the victim. I think he sees his story with his wife as the ultimate love story and they were able to persevere and be together in spite of all the odds. Although he was already having the affair with now-wife, when he got a new job he moved himself and my mum hundreds of miles away from where we'd all lived for 15 years and so when he left my mum, she was stranded, didn't know anyone, and ended up having a nervous breakdown (she has since recovered and moved back to my hometown). He doesn't think much about other people, and I think that he believes that now we're adults, his responsibility to his children has expired.
He is still working and is in the top 1% of UK earners but he claims to be skint all the time (!!!! due to payments he has to make to my mum). I had to ask him to stop talking to me about money as DP and i are really not very well off and it just grinds me down to hear my very wealthy father telling me he has nothing, and the next week splash out on a brand new car. Then! He was visiting my sister a few months ago when he told her we would inherit nothing in his will. He claims if he died tomorrow his wife would be destitute, and that she will inherit everything and when she dies it will be split between us and her children. She is much younger and a quick google tells me there's no way he can stipulate in his will what she does with the money he leaves her. I doubt we will inherit much which is ok; i feel like if he doesn't want us to have it, we are not entitled to it.
The only thing is... in our old family home there is a lot of furniture that our grandfather made, and some artwork that was given to my dad by the artist "for his daughters". These things have very little monetary value but they are really special to me and my sister. I am aware that his (young) stepchildren will grow up with these things in their house, and might come to love them like we do. AIBU to ask my dad to at least put those in the will for us? WWYD?
I'd ask him. They were intended for you. He cant begrudge you that surely. A tough situation but I can't see how asking for some sentimental furniture and art work can offend anyone.
If he's brought the subject up then I can't see a problem with asking for one or two pieces that mean a lot to you.
If he wanted to then he could give her a lifetime interest in the property which means that your inheritance would be protected, but it sounds unlikely that he would.
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