New job - feeling left out(6 Posts)
Ive started a new job in the same company but my new team that i am sat wih dont talk much.....and when they do they dont really talk to me. They are all older than me by around 20 years+ although there is a loud young girl who sits behind our team and she gets them talking - but however hard i try and include myself theu dont seem interested. Going back to just my team, i do a slightly different job to them, so i cant even spark up a conversation by asking for their help or opinion. Im also not very good at making conversation, im very muh an introvert so starting conversation is something im not good at. I try to make a coulple of conversations a day but they are short lived. The team are a heads down team and quite studious and when they do talk 75% of the time its about work - whereby i cant join in. However....there is a lady who sits next to me and i tried making conversation with her monday asking her did you have a nice weekend she said yes did you and that was it. When another team member asked her she started telling him about picking up a pottery item she made and they had a laugh and a joke...why didnt she tell me? Im not sure what to do because i hate feeling left out and lonely. Im considering looking for a new job because its getting to me that much. I thought maybe its me giving off a cold vibe, but my old team visit me to ask questions or to say hello and i have a great happy positive convo with them, surely my team would see this and want me to be part of their convos ? I have only been in the job 3 weeks but they have not really asked me anything about myself during this time unless i have pushed them to ask. Any help or thoughts is much appreciated.
Just keep your head down and get on with your work. Don't worry about talking to colleagues too much.
It's not easy if they are making zero effort.. .. I agree it would be better to try to concentrate on the work.. And not worry about communicating too much at the moment.. It will just wear you out otherwise (easier said than done I know)...I understand that you would like to fit in and it's a horrible feeling being basically ignored..
I felt like that, only it is the other way around, they are all 20 plus years younger, so not a lot in common. I was made redundant after being in the job over 20 years. It's hard to start again. I have been in this job just over a year now, it's better now, but still feel a bit of an outsider. I keep my head down a lot of the time, but do make the odd comment. One of the women has just returned from maternity leave and as my daughter is about to drop her second child, that has at least given me something to talk about.
As long as you are polite and courteous, you should hopefully settle in more soon.
Just going through the threads i have posted and thought i would update this one to say.....everything is going well!!! I have settled in my team and we have a good (but quiet most of the time) relationship. The one person i was worried about ignoring me has actually become my work mum!! How things can change in a few months. Im so much more relaxed now and believe it or not....i enjoy work!
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