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Husbands birthday present?

(15 Posts)
mowgeli Sun 23-Apr-17 23:00:32

Hi ladies,

I've been really sick and haven't ordered anything for my husband birthday on 26th of April. I was in hospital for it last year so I missed out on getting him anything then either. I feel really bad for him.
Money isn't amazing at the moment. He got a great mountain bike for Christmas but hasn't been able to use it except once because my health is shit and he's constantly with me.
I've ordered him online for next day delivery but some stuff isn't next day delivery. It won't kill him to wait as we both have many difficult things on our minds.
I've got so far:
A new back pack his is broken (Herschel Military in Navy Blue)
Amber EDT from new brand Labratory ( I think this is Le Labos more affordable line)
Some clothes from O Neil because we love the out doors so three hoodies and 2 t shirts.

Anything else I could get? I was thinking a jacket for summer but he claims he has too many even though his collection is shit and also not good for the summer for our doors? Sunglasses are hard because he needs to try them on. He has too many shoes. Unpredictable health means no tickets to anything until we know.
I'm looking for something small and sentimental that I won't have to make because I'm too sick at the moment.

Is this enough for him? He's been amazing to our son and me for the last two years he's lived with a chronically I'll wife. I know presents aren't that important and I'll write him a nice card. It's just he was raised as a Jehovas Witness so never got any birthday when he was younger.

Ok Aibu to think this is enough or should I get one more thing?

Ps it's our money but he is the one who physically earns it through his business.

Thank you

BackforGood Sun 23-Apr-17 23:18:42

Sounds loads to me, but only you know what the tradition is in your family.

However, if money is tight, and if you've been ill, then I can't imagine he'd want anything more, even if you have previously got each other more.

mowgeli Sun 23-Apr-17 23:27:10

We used to get each other a lot of presents before I was sick. We have a new understanding of life and are more humble now. I just wondered. I know it's a lot of money it's just in the past I've surprised him with holidays etc as I've had the means to.
Thanks for the in put your probably right. He can use the bits when we go camping again soon. I love him so much and I don't want him to be djssapointed with his gifts as nobody else will get him anything.
Ps I know gifts don't mean anything about how much we love each other.
I just wanted some advice and thank you for being gentle I am very fragile at the moment xx

MyKingdomForBrie Sun 23-Apr-17 23:30:20

Do you feel like he will be disappointed? It sounds like you have some nice bits but I tend to try and go for something to do as well as things to wear - so a gadget or activity type thing, keeps them amused on the day!

CointreauVersial Sun 23-Apr-17 23:34:19

That sounds plenty. But maybe add a nice day out/meal out/ticket to something.

mowgeli Sun 23-Apr-17 23:36:24

brie I'm not sure if he will be dissapointed. We feel a lot less materialistic these days. I did think a good quality camera but the iPhone 7 has amazing quality now so no need. Then I though a strap to put round the phone so he has access to it when we are walking but he said no when I asked him.
what about a small print for the house? Or is that crap? We have a lot of wall paper and photos already.. maybe something for camping. I'll have a quick snoop online for some sort of cooking camping thing.

I'm finding it hard to read people's emotions at the moment with the medicine but I think he genuinely meant that he doesn't want anything only really a token gift. I've also texted a few of his friends he hasn't got many because I've been sick for two years now but to see if they could met him for a beer in the evening.

God I love him and feel so grateful for all he does I'm lost as to how to explain it to him. He's my universe.. he has been upset lately about his business which has suffered because he hasn't been as involved as usual and also he's upset that he hasn't socialised so hopefully some of the friends coild come back and say yes to just one beer. It would make him cry. He is very lonely xxx

SparkleSoiree Mon 24-Apr-17 01:19:09

Are you in a position to organise a small get together for him? Sounds like he would like that.

I hope your health improves flowers

yecartmannew Mon 24-Apr-17 07:29:03

Is there someone who could come and sit with you for a few hours so he could go out on his bike?
Otherwise I think the friend idea is good.
In our family it is much less about material items and more about personal things like this where the gift is thought / time etc.
Ie when the kids were little I often got vouchers from them that they made themselves for washing up for a week or taking the dogs out. Meant so much more than a bunch of flowers or box of chocolates.

CocoLoco87 Mon 24-Apr-17 07:45:06

Could you get him a selfie stick or a go-pro camera so he can capture moments of your camping trips or when he goes on bike rides? You sound lovely and I'm sure he'll be really grateful for his gifts and for you!

AnotherEmma Mon 24-Apr-17 07:57:03

You've already been very generous with gifts. It sounds as if you want to show him how much you love and appreciate him so I think - other than just writing a heartfelt message in a card - you can show that through thoughtful rather than expensive gifts. For example, you could order a personalised card with photos (from Moonpig for example) and/or a personalised gift from notonthehighstreet. You could also make a fuss of him on the day by putting up a "happy birthday" banner and balloons (maybe I'm childish but I still love it when people do that for me!) and get him a birthday cake, you could even order a personalised one if there's still time/money.

I also like the idea of organising a party or celebration for me, especially if he doesn't get much down time due to looking after you.

Could you organise a bit more support for yourself to give him a regular break? It's a separate issue from his birthday but it does sound as if you're wanting to make up for that with birthday presents. It would be great if you could organise things so he could use his bike a bit more for example.

AnotherEmma Mon 24-Apr-17 07:58:21

Don't know where "for me" came from, obviously i meant "for him"!!

mowgeli Mon 24-Apr-17 07:59:10

So last night I messaged his friends and three of the six are genuinely unavailable due to terrible family situation with one and two working.

If we can't do his birthday then I'll see if they can meet him on the weekend. I'll need to find someone to stay with me and our son. I'll ask my SIL about that. My poor MIL is exhausted and I'm now looking into child care...she has enough on her plate without looking after my fill of beans one year old.

We have a go pro and a selfie stick. Maybe I'll plan something that can be cancelled last minute for day July time

X

mowgeli Mon 24-Apr-17 08:03:06

Agreed emma the card is always heart felt. I'm trying to get his friends together. My parents are paying for all of the fees privately thank god because I'm losing the will to live at this point even though my life Is such a nice one when healthy.

I'm looking into help see my cross post with you.

Also he hates cake and says they are a waste of money!!!! But I'll do some balloons a banner and can make him coffee in bed with some toast and I'll bring our son in for cuddles with his dad x

MyKingdomForBrie Mon 24-Apr-17 14:31:43

Balloons banner and coffee in bed sounds perfect! I don't think you need to get anything else.

mowgeli Wed 26-Apr-17 19:41:50

Brie thank you I did this morning as you said for my husband and he explained how things have lost their importance to him as he's gotten older and I've gotten sick.

Humble pie x

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