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Family becoming strangers

(10 Posts)
user1492510349 Tue 18-Apr-17 11:15:14

Hi all me and my partner don't drive and his siblings live around an hour away but starting to get really annoyed every time they are in town they never ever tell us so we never get to see them or there kids gets me really down because we are missing out on everything and our nieces and nephews are just strangers, other family members go down but never even offer to take us even though there is plenty of room on a Rare occasion we get asked 5mins before there go which is impossible to get out of work. Anyone else been in this situation xx

vvviola Tue 18-Apr-17 11:20:52

Is there public transport that you could take to go visit them? Or do you invite them up to visit you? Or is there somewhere half way that's easy for you to get to.

You can't expect other people to do all the running - if you want a relationship with them, you need to let them know. Yes it's hard when you don't drive - but that doesn't stop you inviting them (and you may find that once you've invited them a few times, they may start saying "we're in town on Saturday, fancy catching up")

stolemyusername Tue 18-Apr-17 11:24:16

You need to learn to drive, or at the very least look up the public transport options available to you.

If I was travelling somewhere an hour away I would quite probably plan to do other things while I was in the area (shopping/lunch/local attractions), so it's doubtful I would be too forthcoming in ferrying you about.

Justmadeperfectflapjacks Tue 18-Apr-17 12:28:54

Are they just not that into you for some reason? Fall out? Niggling issues?

skyzumarubble Tue 18-Apr-17 12:37:17

It is extremely frustrating to expect to give lifts to family members all the time because they can't drive.

NotCitrus Tue 18-Apr-17 12:43:18

They're just not that into you. I live about 40 min (drive or public transport) from SIL and we meet up about once every 5 years, after a lot of attempts to persuade them that dn and ds ought to get to know each other. If they wanted to, they could come over or we could visit them every other weekend and most days in the holidays!

Wolfiefan Tue 18-Apr-17 12:45:11

You can't expect people to visit you everytime or give you a lift everytime. Can't you use public transport?

user1492510349 Tue 18-Apr-17 15:04:10

This is the problem we know what town they live in but won't tell us the address we have invited them down or said when use are next in town we will catch up but no luck when they used to live round here we where so close and at each other's houses all the time but starting to think we were used as babysitters. We never ask anyone for a lift but when they are going down they could say do u want to come etc x

Justmadeperfectflapjacks Thu 20-Apr-17 19:53:42

The fact they won't give you their address spells it out imo.
Sorry op.

Allthebestnamesareused Tue 25-Apr-17 17:04:52

They moved away and won't give address! hmm. Did you continually try to use them as a taxi when they lived nearby. As to others offering you lifts perhaps they too feel used!

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