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Wedding drama - advice?

(5 Posts)
Thewanderer03 Sat 01-Apr-17 19:07:09

I'm getting married in June in Greece. My df passed away last year and as we didn't want a big wedding or much fuss my dh to be and I decided to go away and do it whilst there. It's been booked for a couple of months and we're both really looking forward to it. Dm is fine with it as she is unable to fly., fil has voiced his opinion that he is upset with decision. We booked the wedding in any event deciding it was best for us. Now dh to be is saying he wants family there, dm suffers very severe anxiety especially when travelling so unlikely to come, db may be able to make it though not sure with finances after got himself into bit of a mess. In which case it would just be me and dh and his parents and possibly 2 brothers. AIBU not liking this idea? I have suggested party once home for all family and friends or getting married here to have people there but dh is not happy with either idea. Any advice?

Iflyaway Sat 01-Apr-17 19:31:16

Sounds like it's more about what they want than you do.

Don't be rollercoasted into doing what is not in your best interests.

Marriage is for life as they say.

Easier being out than in wink

Wishiwasmoiradingle2017 Sat 01-Apr-17 19:38:18

No disrespect to your new family - to- be, but this is when you start as you mean to go on with them -
Your wedding - your decisions (with oh of course!)
Unless you intent to let them rule your whole marriage also. ???

BackforGood Sat 01-Apr-17 19:41:56

I'm torn on this, as I'd be really upset if any of my dc chose to get married without me being there.
Whereas I understand your reason for wanting a quiet do out of the limelight, I can also see that the vast majority of people see a person's wedding as something they want to share with those close to them.
It's something that you and your dhtb should have been really clear about what your decision was in the first place though - he presumably could have predicted that his family would want to be there before you booked anything ?

Thewanderer03 Sat 01-Apr-17 19:46:21

Sorry posted on two threads here so traffic!

Dh originally wanted to go away and get married whilst there. Mentioned about having family there once before booking but we agreed we wanted to do it the way we had spoken about and have a family meal once home with them all so booked it. I think fil has swayed him slightly. I also think it's our decision I am not too worried about their opinions, though of course wouldn't want to upset them but I'm worried about dh being sad his family are not there though he agreed to this? And doesn't want a party once home with them or to marry here with them? Which leaves wedding as it is potentially with just his parents? Possibly brothers if they can make it.

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