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Posted bad online review now being asked to justify

(6 Posts)
FuckOffCuntyJournos Thu 02-Mar-17 15:40:33

NC'd as I'm feeling slighly ashamed of myself, although I'm not even sure if that's justified. There's no-one in RL I can ask for advice.

In summary, I've written a bad review of someone online anonymously and now the proprieter has posted on the forum, asking me to give them specifics so that they can investigate. I'm looking for a bit of a kick up the bum/moral guidance from you lot.

Let's call the proprietor Oliver. I don't want to give specifics as it's very identifying.

I wrote the review, as someone else was looking for the service in our location that Oliver provides. Another poster had given him a glowing review, recommending him. So I got annoyed when I saw this and posted saying, I'm actually thinking of moving from him because 2 treatments have failed and IMO the office is run very badly. I did say he generally has a very good reputation but that it wasn't my experience.

I'll give a few more specifics here, while trying to stay general too. Sorry I know this is probably frustrating to read. Let's just say this is quite expensive health-related treatment and I can claim some credits towards it from the state.

Anyway, as mentioned, 2 treatments have failed. I had to sign a waiver, so I have no legal comeback as the risk of failure was pointed out to me, albeit as very low risk. The reason I'm annoyed is:
- Oliver didn't do the first treatment, but referred me to someone as it requires extra qualifications. He has since stopped using that person, leading me to wonder if there was a question over their expertise. He then had to refer me to a new person to repeat the treatment, which seems to have been successful this time (but I paid twice).
- Oliver started a similar treatment on a second area, but couldn't finish it himself. As mentioned, I'm not sure he's fully qualified to do it, but he made it sound completely normal that he would do it. When he couldn't finish it, he then referred me onwards, and it was the fully qualified person who found out something had gone wrong since (not during) the first treatment, so it would be pointless. I was waiting 2 months between both appointments. I will now have to fork out £2,000+ to have the issue resolved. I did ask Oliver how this happened, but I feel like I was given a wishy-washy answer with no reference to the fact that he shouldn't have started the treatment himself. At the same time, I can't prove, nor will ever know, if that was the reason it failed.

In terms of the office being run badly, these have been my issues, specifically with the office mgr, let's call her Lily:
- I was given someone else's statement off the printer last year by Lily by accident. I was annoyed but it was the first issue I'd had, so I just shredded it and said nothing.
- Lily refused (in a nice way) to help me prepare my claim forms until all the treatment has finished (there is no requirement to combine everything and I would have got my refund sooner). She said she'd keep my claim form in my file. When I went to try to finish my claim a few weeks ago, she said she didn't have the claim form.
- I had one appointment cancelled as Oliver was off sick. No issues there and at the time I was given an appointment 2 weeks later by Lily. However, I was then called a few days later (by one of Lily's staff) and told I would have to wait 5 weeks for the new appointment. Told them I was very unhappy and got an apology at the time, but that was it. My sense is that I was put to the back of the queue.
- I rang Lily a few weeks ago looking for a financial statement for last year, so that I could finally prepare my claim. After having to ring twice, and being told it was with Oliver to sort out, I ended up waiting 4 weeks to get the statement.

This might be very viper-y of me, but I'm also a bit annoyed that Oliver has boasted (in front of me) about giving free (normally very expensive) treatment to an online blogger and that he's getting a lot of new business as a result.

I wonder if I'm being precious about all of the above. The terrible thing is, I'm still going there because one piece of treatment has to get finished. Oliver is genuinely pleasant, professional in all other ways, highly qualified and like I say, hugely popular and I've had no issues during the treatments themselves. However, I have started looking for other practioners and I don't think I will get the big £2,000 treatment done there.

But what do I do about my online post? I said I was ashamed of myself, and really it's because it genuinely never occurred to me that Oliver might see it. I thought I was just giving a word of warning to the person who asked for recommendations. I know, how stupid I am - it's the internet! What I posted wasn't a lie, but it's been insinuated that I'm some sort of troll.

I really don't know if I'm brave enough to tell him it was me. Also it could mean exposing a lot of personal stuff as I hadn't NCd for my post. I could try telling him about all of the issues above the next time I see him, but if I'm going to leave I'm not sure it's worth it. Also, he would easily tie it back to being me that posted the review.

In all honesty, I'd rather do nothing, finish the treatment I have to finish and then get outta there. But does that make me a despicable excuse for a human being?

I don't think it's fair for Oliver to be worrying about some anonymous person on the internet potentially damaging his business. But at the same time, in my meekish way, I feel like I have tried complaining twice and not getting anywhere.

I guess I'm asking what would you do? I know most of you would have the common sense/decency not to post in the first place. Also, I know a lot of this has been caused by me not being assertive enough and complaining directly at the time of each incident. I've learned a huge lesson.

Bloopbleep Thu 02-Mar-17 15:44:14

Why not just say what you've written above?

OrangeJulius Thu 02-Mar-17 16:17:19

You've written a bad review based on your experience, totally fine. You don't have to do anything further if you don't want.

MorelloKisses Thu 02-Mar-17 16:23:52

People want people like you to write reviews. You were honest. It is ok.

Finish your treatment and then if you fell inclined, service Oliver with the specifics above, if you aren't inclined, leave it be.

shoofly Thu 02-Mar-17 16:31:21

Can't you just tell him, what you've put above and give him the opportunity to sort it out

FuckOffCuntyJournos Fri 03-Mar-17 17:46:02

Thank you all for your replies, honestly I was worried I'd be flamed.

Bloop and shoofly you're right. The only reason I'm hesitating doing that is, that first, I'm really afraid of - and terrible at - confrontation. I'd be terrified to start the conversation or how to word it without sounding nasty. Also, now I know there's probably no way of getting away from him realising it was me that posted the review. I'm probably being paranoid about my online identity, but I don't like the idea of him being able to link to some personal stuff. I'm an idiot.

I am not going to decide right now, but I am going to strongly consider your suggestion Morello. I'll see out this treatment and then if I'm definitely moving on, it's only fair to give him my reasons for leaving, as constructively as I can. If he links me to the online post, so be it.

Thanks again to you all for responding. Much appreciated.

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