Caught husband lying(1 Post)
I'm new to this site and wanted to get a few opinions from people who don't know me or my husband so here goes! I will try to keep it short however it's the small details that count sometimes!! Been married 26 years H has always been loving caring good husband couldn't fault him. H got a new job in 2013 expense account trips abroad as its for a European company. Meals out entertaining drinking etc! Said to him a few times u need to stop as he was out drinking but nothing to terrible he has a big client acccount that he has to look after. Has to entertain them things seemed to change in my eyes around January 2015 he had been to the Christmas party with big client and never told me what had happened (unusual). He was still out and about and I warned him a couple of times to treat it as work and not a social life. Then May 2015 my niece passed away then in June we went on holiday H was not himself I said what's wrong? Nothing he said!! Then in June he said he he a meeting and then was going out after I said funny that u would have a meeting in same day. I then found out he had lied I checked his phone (first time in 28 years) he had lied about the meeting. Said he didn't want it to look like he was out having fun and didn't want to hurt me!! Really!! Said it had given him the kick up the backside (getting caught) that he needed. Anyway I didn't think to much of it just that he was an idiot!! Then in July my Nephew passed away it hit me for six he was like my own son. Husband was cold. Day after funeral he went to a meeting and didn't call me all day when I mentioned this to him he said he had obviously in my emotional state I thought maybe I had forgotten but check phone records and he didn't call me till 7.25 that evening he called numerous people before me. Then I caught him lying again in September he said he had got in about 7pm in actual fact he got in at 3 (I wasn't in the country in this day) weird email on phone. Then he has a night out arranged I say I'm not happy my best friend tells him his marriage is on the line. He goes anyway!! He is absolutely going no matter
What is at stake!! Anyway it all calms down in November And December (to be truthful I was too grief stricken to deal with it properly) then in January he is up to it again goes on business meeting I find a message on his phone from
Work colleague (female who works for the big clients) who he says he don't say 2 words too her but the content of the message was deleted. Confront him he says he don't know. He has anothe 2 day meeting in January read his email again and he has got totally drunk! Then he asks if it's OK if he goes out I tell him I'm not happy best friend tells him marriage is on the line. He goes anyway! Then in March it all comes to a head he goes to the factory in Europe gets totally drunk and get in trouble with his boss! I find an email from his boss saying he wants to talk to him. I then say I want him to call this work colleague he always goes out with he don't want to I take his phone but he has sent this fella 2 trxt secretly to tell him not to answer the phone. And deleted them I only found out because I had turned off iMessage on his phone so saw then on his phone record! He then confesses he has been to strip clubs while he is away working. Taken cocaine and gets drunk he don't remember the text messages or why he deleted them. I send his phone away for forensics and find that he has sent this girl a text at 2am when he was drunk he also googled a girl who works there!! I don't think I can forgive him for all this as it was at a time when I needed him. He is totally gone back to normal now. No going out tells me where he is etc. But this all went on for 18 months. I'm tired with thinking about it and so upset that I didn't get time to grieve my neice or nephew properly as I was busy checking on him!!
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