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MIL sharing our baby news on FB, and we don't want any of it online!

(6 Posts)
ThePartyArtist Mon 26-Sep-16 10:00:40

I'm pregnant with our first child and we've just started telling people. I use Facebook, DH doesn't. We have agreed that we don't want the baby on there - so there's been no online pregnancy announcement, and we won't be putting photos on.

No one we've told about the pregnancy has mentioned anything online, except for MIL who is writing lots of statuses about her excitement about being a grandma, and tagging me. I am deliberately avoiding replying to these or giving Facebook permissions for these posts to appear on my wall. However, still feeling rather conflicted about it. I can see she is just really excited, which is lovely, and I don't want to spoil her fun. However I also think it is pretty ignorant of her not to notice that we're not putting anything online and follow suit.
Both DH and I are worried that his mum might put loads of photos and statuses about the baby once it's born and we really want to avoid this. He feels it's easier to tell her BEFORE it's born that we don't want this baby to have an online presence, including her tagging me in statuses about it. I'm just worried about offending her (she loves a drama and posting on FB and I don't think will understand why we don't want it online).

I am trying to think of ways we can channel her enthusiasm into something else - have thought about whats app groups or google drives or apps where you share pics only with an invited audience. However I think ultimately these won't allow her to share the excitement with her Facebook friends, so won't seem quite the same to her. We live overseas so she will be feeling the distance I think, and I just want to keep everyone happy but also not have my child all over Facebook, including before it's born!

MoonlightandMusic Mon 26-Sep-16 23:35:11

Firstly - congratulations!

I'd go with letting DH tell her not to do it now - it will be far worse after the baby arrives. Maybe define what you (both) are comfortable with her posting - so fine for her to post about her excitement in being a grandma, not fine for her to provide photos/child's name/sex etc.,

Redglitter Mon 26-Sep-16 23:39:09

Does it really matter if she posts statuses after the baby is here.

Can you compromise and make sure her account is private and restrict or ban photos. It seems a shame to stop her posting as a proud granny

wobblywonderwoman Mon 26-Sep-16 23:39:17

Totally agree with limiting baby news on Facebook- we have put up very little

I think you haven't been direct enough with her about it. I imagine she doesn't know your feelings just from not noticing you haven't put anything up.

But I would let dh tell her. He doesn't have a fb account and is the blood relative so leave him do the talking.

RaeSkywalker Mon 26-Sep-16 23:40:10

I think you need to tell her. It's not fair to be getting cross if she doesn't know how you feel.

We've made the same decision as you about the pregnancy/ baby not being on social media, but we've made this clear to people, especially family (who are more likely to have photos etc).

RaeSkywalker Mon 26-Sep-16 23:41:04

^ and by "you", I don't mean you on your own. Your DH could do it alone, or with you.

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