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Another mother said this loudly in the playground....

(34 Posts)
tired99 Tue 20-Sep-16 18:03:32

This morning at school drop off another mother pointed to my ds1 who is 5 and said "his shoes are on the wrong feet". I replied "not again!" to which she replied "he's always got clothes on the wrong way around." As you can imagine I was mortified.

For a bit of background, I do have to check every morning that he's got his shoes on the wrong feet and had this morning but he'd put them back on the wrong feet again! His jumper is occasionally on the wrong way if he's had p.e. but never before school!

I'd only spoken to this mother once before, last week at the PTA meeting.

Mummamayhem Tue 20-Sep-16 18:05:50

Sure she didn't mean her own child? Or saying it in an isn't he cute/funny way? Just shrug it off, he's learning.

takesnoprisoners Tue 20-Sep-16 18:07:42

So what? She was only pointing out the fact. If you don't like it just ignore her.

NewPotatoes Tue 20-Sep-16 18:08:00

Surely she's the one who should be blushing as what one assumes was meant to be a joky 'aren't five year olds adorable?' comment clearly didn't emerge the way she thought?

DavidWainwrightsFeet Tue 20-Sep-16 18:09:42

He's five - it's an endearing foible and I suggest that you'll be happier if you interpret her remark in an affectionate way.

Or as pp said, the "he" in the second sentence could have been her own child.

tired99 Tue 20-Sep-16 18:09:54

No she spoke to me directly about my ds and it didn't seem very jokey.

ChinchillaFur Tue 20-Sep-16 18:12:21

Aww I reckon she was just trying to make friendly chit chat. Shame it didn't come across well. At dd's school we all chat about or dc's little foibles in the playground. It's .... bonding?

AnotherUsernameBitesTheDust Tue 20-Sep-16 18:13:54

I don't really understand why you were mortified? My youngest was always in clothes that were round the wrong way/shoes on the wrong feet etc. I'd laugh about it. I'd have laughed if she'd have said it. If she really was being nasty then who gives a fuck? Most kids get their clothes wrong at that age.

Lilaclily Tue 20-Sep-16 18:15:09

You're massive over thinking it but if you're sure she was being mean at least now you know who to avoid at the school gate

hesterton Tue 20-Sep-16 18:16:05

She should be mortified she made you feel mortified. Don't be mortified and noone needs to be mortified.

CorkieD Tue 20-Sep-16 18:17:54

I would also consider it an amusing foible in a five year-old. If she didn't find it endearing, I would consider the remark odd. Perhaps she has OCD or something similar?

GerdaLovesLili Tue 20-Sep-16 18:18:27

Small Son is nearly 8. He's only just reached the stage where I don't have to rigorously check that his clothes/shoes/head are on backwards. He's just not that engaged with reality sometimes.

If someone said that to me it would probably be in a tone of resigned solidarity, or at least that's how I'd interpret it.

Onenerfwarfrombreakdown Tue 20-Sep-16 18:19:14

Why are you mortified? confused who the fuck is she and why does she even matter? If I was in a good mood I'd laugh it off. If I was in a bad mood, I'd give her a glare and say something like "and this is your business HOW exactly??"
Either way, stop giving a flying fuck what some random thinks about you and your child. School gates can be tough, grow a thicker skin and find some nicer people to stand and chat with. smile

Queenbean Tue 20-Sep-16 18:19:47

She was just making chit chat

tired99 Tue 20-Sep-16 18:22:07

It wasn't the shoes on the wrong feet that bothered me it was the second comment.

I guess I must be reading too much into it. We are new to the area and I've not found people to be that welcoming.

MrsHam13 Tue 20-Sep-16 18:34:45

I don't think you are reading too much into it. I think she was making a dig to make you feel inferior. That's what some people do to make themselves feel better. Iv experienced it a few times over the years with a few different mums. Some people think life's a competition.

I'd of just replied 'aw that's nice of you to of noticed, he has been doing well attempting to get himself dressed in the mornings. He has a strong sense of independence and determination. It will take him far in life' smile and walk away to fix his shoes.

WinchesterWoman Tue 20-Sep-16 18:37:05

She was rude, don't worry you are right. You just don't say that sort of thing to someone you don't know well. It's a bit off really.

WinchesterWoman Tue 20-Sep-16 18:38:04

Yes, Mrs Ham is totally right. She does sound like someone to be avoided. Always asking about reading levels I bet. These people are just painful. What a shame you've met one so early on in primary.

Whatthefreakinwhatnow Tue 20-Sep-16 18:42:38

Oh for God's sake, are you really upset by this?! You've got another 13 years of school to go, maybe work on getting a grip thicker skin, or you'll be mortified all the time! hmm

WinchesterWoman Tue 20-Sep-16 19:02:26

Oh it's embarrassing when something like that happens. It's a small thing but it's not nice.

user1473184683 Sun 02-Oct-16 04:56:51

Tbh I would find this quite rude as this woman does not know you well enough to say things like that.

MoominKitten Sun 02-Oct-16 05:02:03

Maybe she's trying to start a conversation, but was a bit clumsy.

DustyOfSkye Sun 02-Oct-16 05:15:28

I'd give her the benefit of the doubt to begin with and see how things go. She might just be socially awkward with a tendency to blurt things out or she might be a complete pain in the bum judgey pants.

Either way, try not to take it too seriously. its a sweet and funny mistake that he's bound to grow out of in time. smile

FreddoFrog Sun 02-Oct-16 05:22:24

Cut a sticker in two, put a half
in each shoe so your DS knows when he's got them on the right feet (ie the sticker is correctly back together again. A smiley face works well)

Teachers/other parents are forever saying this to my (young) kids. Just ignore, most likely she meant it in a light-hearted way.

SofiaAmes Sun 02-Oct-16 05:25:36

Just make a joke out of it. I do. I just tell people that our entire family aren't terribly good with left and right, but we do get it right 50% of the time, so that's something. This usually leaves the bright people smiling and the dumb ones trying to figure out why we get it right 50% of the time.
Having said that, I would probably point out that your child's shoes were on the wrong feet, not out of nastiness, but out of trying to be helpful because I would have appreciated someone pointing it out to me.

Milestones are not all that they are made out to be:
My latest is that my 15 year old ds has just figured out that he never learned to tie his shoelaces properly and announced to me the other day that he was ready to learn this skill.....NOTE that he has been building his own computers since he was 10 and eating fish eggs with chopsticks since he was 2 (not Japanese, just like going out for sushi). Clearly not a fine motor skill issue.
Dd misspelled her own name until she was 8 or 9 and still at 14 misspells at least half of what she writes. She was reading at a college level by 9 or 10. Spelling is just not in her skill set. I went to MIT, got an A in advanced calculus, but can't add 5 and 7 in my head and don't really know my multiplication tables.

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