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Sad about not being invited to wedding

(11 Posts)
2weeksholiday Mon 15-Aug-16 15:45:52

An ex colleague and, I thought, friend, got married on Saturday and I wasn't invited. Two colleagues that I work with went and have talked about it all day. One of them I know is quite close to the 'friend' but I didn't think the other one was. I feel really sad about it 😢

Do you think I should do anything? I sent her a text saying congratulations, but I think that this demonstrates we aren't friends anymore.

She's 50 and on her second marriage. She came to my wedding and sons christening.

Dreamfrog Mon 15-Aug-16 23:12:49

I understand you feel left out but don't say anything about it. It's done. Perhaps the other two have kept more in contact than you realised. Don't dwell on it. It's not worth it.

2weeksholiday Tue 16-Aug-16 09:38:52

I know it's not worth it. Thanks Dreamfrog x

MrsNuckyThompson Tue 16-Aug-16 09:53:17

Agree, sounds hurtful but you don't know what's gone on in the background. They might only have had a limited number of invitations, and who knows what the relationship with the others is like. Nothing good can come of saying anything - at worst maybe the friendship is over, at best maybe you'll get back in touch and she'll explain herself what happened. Take the moral high ground.

ThoraGruntwhistle Tue 16-Aug-16 10:01:53

A couple of people from school who I thought of as close friends have got married over the last few years and invited lots of mutual friends but not me. I only found out about one of them by seeing the pictures on Facebook. It is a bit hurtful but you just have to accept it and move on, there's nothing else you can do.

RaeSkywalker Tue 16-Aug-16 10:05:53

I agree with what others have said- sending a text won't change it, I'd do nothing and wait to see if she initiates contact at some point. It does sound like the friendship might have fizzled out though- sorry sad

FaithAscending Tue 16-Aug-16 10:15:14

I had this with a current colleague. She invited everyone from work (apart from those working - we do shifts) except me. I don't know why. I've thought of various reasons like that I've unintentionally annoyed her, there was limited space. In the end I just had to accept it was her choice. Obviously we still work together so I asked about the wedding/honeymoon when she got back and acted like it didn't bother me.
It hurts though, I get why you're upset.

2weeksholiday Tue 16-Aug-16 13:12:56

Thanks everyone, I feel better that you get why I'm upset. I will try and move on and not let it get to me too much

imsorryiasked Tue 16-Aug-16 13:58:48

We had a very limited number of invites and picked 4 of our closest colleagues (we worked together, big office) and their partners. However one colleagues DH was unable to attend so without asking she brought a friend. The friend was another colleague who neither of us particularly liked. Word obviously got back to other people in the office and some people were naturally a bit put out that we had seemingly invited one person and left out lots of others who we were closer friends with.

OliviaStabler Tue 16-Aug-16 14:13:28

I had this with a friend in my mid twenties. I thought we were good friends but she did not invite me to her wedding. She showed me the photos at a later date but was upset. It finished the friendship for me as either a) we were not as close as I thought or b) she had limited spaces but did not tell me. I felt pushed out.

Mari22 Tue 23-Aug-16 15:39:15

My OH's best friend! And our daughters godfather got married and didn't tell us. We found out when they posted pics on Facebook. I was so upset and couldn't believe it. I questioned why they hadn't told us and she said they hadn't told anyone and as there was only limited numbers they'd invited family only. I can understand the limited numbers, and didn't have a problem with that, but we were so hurt that they didn't tell us about any of it. There were words and we haven't spoken since and it's so sad as our girls have, effectively, lost their godfather. I can understand your upset xx

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