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Booked too many meals out!

(9 Posts)
MillicentKing Sun 31-Jul-16 07:58:14

So, my STBX is away and I have a period of calm (EA divorce, I am under huge strain), coinciding with no school term time clock watching.

I have therefore arranged to see friends most evenings, one to one. All these friend know of my situation.

We've made dinner plans, cos that's what you do if you go out in the evening isn't it?

It's now occurring to me that I really can't afford to go out to dinner 6 times in the next fortnight (already had 2 meals out last week).

It's entirely my fault. WWYD? I'm absolutely not going to cancel seeing them (these are all really good friends). Be honest? They know I'm just about to take on a remortgage and be a single mum, but I don't want them to offer to pay. Have a starter only and risk drawing attention to myself (I've lost a lot of weight and feel quite self conscious)?

It'll be over £100 that I really need to not spend just on going out to eat.

drinkyourmilk Sun 31-Jul-16 08:00:25

Are you happy to cook at your house a couple of times? Or just suggest drinks

drinkyourmilk Sun 31-Jul-16 08:01:09

Also- look at where you would plan to eat out. Is there a cheaper alternative?

SeashellHoarder Sun 31-Jul-16 08:02:17

Yep, just offer to host at home.

cexuwaleozbu Sun 31-Jul-16 08:05:46

They are friends. They know your situation.
A real friend isn't going to bat an eyelid if you say "oops I didn't think this through. I really want to see you on Wednesday as planned but can't afford the cash or the calories for a restaurant - can we have a night in at mine or yours instead?"
Anyone who makes a fuss= not your friend.

tribpot Sun 31-Jul-16 08:08:50

As it's (allegedly) summer, why not convert a couple of the dinner plans into an evening walk? You get to chat and get some fresh air and exercise at the same time.

I would be honest and say you're having to watch your spending very carefully. drinkyourmilk's suggestion of cooking at your house is good (or getting a takeaway). If some friends offer to pay for you, you could accept as long as they're clear you won't be able to reciprocate - true friends aren't going to care about that given your circumstances.

MillicentKing Sun 31-Jul-16 08:28:56

Thank you all (on phone, excuse brevity!).

Hosting at my house has hurdles - my 17 yo will be around. He's no trouble but I wouldn't be able to talk freely about things if he's in earshot and I do not want to pack him off to his room.

Cooking dinner for 2 isn't much cheaper than me paying for a small meal out, is it?
I live quite a way from a couple of these friends (another reason we don't see each other very often) and a trek to mine is quite a distance.

I do feel comfortable with changing venue. It combines honesty with a reasonable solution.

I'll do some more thinking. Always a solution on MN!
Also with a couple of them I could actually change the plans - tell them I'll eat at home myself but meet for a drink and walk.

MillicentKing Sun 31-Jul-16 22:43:20

Update. One (my oldest friend from childhood) has confirmed ok for drinks and a walk.

tribpot Mon 01-Aug-16 14:24:40

That's good - and better for you than eating out, too.

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