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Advice please

(11 Posts)
Danfra06 Mon 06-Jun-16 21:37:35

Me and my ex partner have a court order which states my daughter lives with me and spends time with him every other weekend. Basically my current partner got drunk last night (he never drinks) and me and him had a small argument which he blew out of proportion and as a way of hurting me he messaged my ex to say he needs to get full custody of my daughter and I'm psycho and need to be sectioned. This was at 1am. My current partner woke up this morning with no recollection of this and has cried ever since.
My ex has said he has been in touch with ss and cafcass and they have told him to go for full custody.
Would they do something like that over a drunken message. My daughter is exceeding herself in everything. She is 2and a half. She has always lived with me. She's only had a relationship with her dad for 9 months. I have never done any harm towards my daughter she is a very happy child.

Just need any advice on what social services would say and do. And what chance it has of going to court for full custody and if it would be given. I'm so scared. I've done nothing wrong and all this over a small argument and a lie

StealthPolarBear Mon 06-Jun-16 21:40:33

I suspect this would go a lot better if you split with your partner

StealthPolarBear Mon 06-Jun-16 21:41:41

I'd also be contacting S's myself and explaining and working with them to ensure they see what a fantastic mum your dd has.

EarthboundMisfit Mon 06-Jun-16 21:45:58

It doesn't ring true re SS.
Tears aside, your current partner needs to go, right now, for your DC's sake if not for yours.

ILostItInTheEarlyNineties Mon 06-Jun-16 21:51:24

Your current partner needs to retract what he said, apologise and admit he lied. It was a childish, vindictive thing to do and if he's a new partner I would be wary of his occasional binge drinking and acting out of character and then being full of remorse the next day. It sounds like bad news and SS might be more interested in your new partner and his influence on your dd.

As far as his allegation of you needing to be sectioned, I very much doubt SS will investigate this. You don't have mental health issues and are not neglecting or harming your dd. There is no evidence of this.

Your ex maybe making empty threats about full custody. If you are on good terms it's probably best to have a frank discussion with him about what's best for your dd.

Danfra06 Mon 06-Jun-16 21:58:03

I did forget to mention I have depression. But I've been stable for over a year and have a very supportive family around me.
Surely social services would do some sort of investigation or at least speak to me before advising full custody?

ILostItInTheEarlyNineties Mon 06-Jun-16 22:04:10

Yes they would. If your ex has only just come into his daughter's life, it sounds very unlikely.

LineyReborn Mon 06-Jun-16 22:05:54

Yes, SS would need to do an assessment first.

But ...

What a nasty, vile thing for your 'partner' to do. How long have you been together, btw? How does he even have your Ex's phone number?

MariaSklodowska Mon 06-Jun-16 22:06:06

It is not 'custody' and has not been for a long time.
If I were you, I would get rid of your BF and contact SS myself.

" as a way of hurting me he messaged my ex to say he needs to get full custody of my daughter and I'm psycho and need to be sectioned. "

And you haven't thrown him out? What a total cunt. You should get rid of him if that is his idea of normal behaviour and stop inflicting him on yourself and on your daughter.

MariaSklodowska Mon 06-Jun-16 22:07:26

I just mean that if your ex is using the word 'custody' then he hasn't spoken to a SW.

BertrandRussell Mon 06-Jun-16 22:11:37

Your current partner needs to go.

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