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Baby number 2; now, later or never

(6 Posts)
xsamzx Tue 24-Jun-14 00:24:16

I'm 24, my partner is 32 and our little girl has just turned 2. I always thought that one child would be enough, my partner and I were together 4 years before I finally convinced him to have a baby and now I have opened the floodgates!! He wants to keep having more now he has realised how amazing it is with our LG. I am one of 5 and at Christmas I realised how lovely it is to get together with siblings and reminisce etc so decided that I definitely don't want our baby to be an only child. I just don't know whether the best idea is to keep the ball rolling or leave a big age gap? We both work full time, my Grandma is our child minder and she is amazing, we make the most of our mornings/evenings/weekends and although we would obviously like more time as a family our life does work well. Apart from the obvious stress of getting ourselves and a 2 year old ready for the day, running a newly bought house and trying to have some time together. We recently decided to start trying for baby #2 but then a friend (of 2 children) put the frighteners on and totally warned me off the idea. My partners theory is 'in for a penny, in for a pound' we're manic busy with one child plus life so why not have more? But I am totally freaked out now. I know 100% that I don't want our girl to be an only child but I always thought I'd want a close age gap. But work is going really well at the mo, I am a manager and everything is on the up so don't want to rock the boat by taking mat leave (plus have a house to pay for so need a good job) but do I want to leave a huge gap and then have another baby just as I have gotten used to having a child out of nappies etc. I love my little girl and do not get me wrong, she was planned and I completely love my life but can't decide on what to do next. Have another baby now, later or never?! Sorry for the twenty page essay but I'm completely confused!! confused blush

whereisthewitch Tue 24-Jun-14 00:38:57

I'd do it now tbh....We've just had our second and DD is 2 9!
It's great, difficult but easier than the first time and dd is at a great age. ...she's a wee mummy to ds!
I think it's good that it's all still quite fresh in our minds, that's why we decided to not leave it too long.

joanofarchitrave Tue 24-Jun-14 00:51:32

Could you have another baby, take 2 weeks' maternity leave and your partner take a long career break/paternity leave? That would sort the job...

As the mother of an only child, I have to say it is a huge regret to me for his sake that we didn't have another, reasonably close together. I think it was probably the right decision for our family overall but only just, and it is painful to me to think about it. I think 3 years apart sounds like a good gap.

I can only say this as an outsider, but I do think the first year with a second child can be very tough. I don't see many people regretting it though.

Xcountry Tue 24-Jun-14 00:52:59

You will know when because it will feel right. I would do it now but I am not you, only you can answer that question on when the time is right

xsamzx Thu 26-Jun-14 18:32:43

Thank you for your comments, I really appreciate people's opinions smile

crazykat Thu 26-Jun-14 19:03:42

I'd do it now and get the sleepless nights and nappies over with.

Then you can concentrate on your career without constantly looking for the best time to have dc2.

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