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Found fag packet in DD's (14) pocket

(62 Posts)
Reincarnatedpig Sun 16-Feb-14 13:06:24

Dd is out at a sleepover. DH just emptied her blazer pockets to take it to the cleaners and found a packet of 10 menthol fags with 3 left. I am surprised as dd always seemed to be an anti smoker. No lighter. Slim possibility they are a friends I suppose.

What is the best way if handling this? She seems fully aware of the risks of smoking so I assume it is some peer pressure thing.

Innogen Sun 16-Feb-14 13:08:09

They are not a friends.

Fags are expensive. You don't just leave them about, in my experience. You look after your own fags.

My dd would be getting a bollocking.

DipMeInChocolate Sun 16-Feb-14 13:11:41

They are not a friends. Although that's what I told my parents. Thats £4 worth of fags. Mine would also be bollocked but having been there I'm not sure what would stop me smoking.

DulcetMoans Sun 16-Feb-14 13:12:55

If she seems aware of the health risks then that might not be the angle. I see kids smoking most mornings as I live near a school and I can't help but think how stupid they look. So 'try hard', holding these little cancer sticks awkwardly because they think its the grown up thing to do and puffing out with a little cough. Do you think there is any value of telling her how stupid her and her friends probably look, as well as reinforcing the health issue and punishing appropriately? I just wonder, when I see them, would they still do it if they could see how silly they look?!

Tough for you though, hope she listens.

DebbieOfMaddox Sun 16-Feb-14 13:18:33

My brother tried to tell my mother that he was collecting cigarette packets out of aesthetic interest...

Reincarnatedpig Sun 16-Feb-14 13:18:39

Thanks. Will see what she has to say when she gets home. Imprisoned during half term with no money and only homework for company I think...

HandsOffMyGazBaz Sun 16-Feb-14 13:18:43

If it was my child, id kill em, they wouldn't see daylight for montha. But that is because my dad is dying from smoking and we can do nothing but watch it happen. Everyone knows my feelings on the matter.

However you know what works for her, you need to decide is it punishment, talking, shock tactics??

When I gave up smoking 5 years ago, I read someone's story about how their husband was dying, and they photographed everything, it was horrifying to look at and any time I see a box of smokes the same image comes into my head and I feel disgusted. I know she is only 14 but if she thinks she is old enough to smoke then she is old enough for the consequences.

Reincarnatedpig Sun 16-Feb-14 13:31:12

So sorry to hear about your dad HandsoffmyGazBaz. I think the young think they are indestructible. DH was born prematurely as a result of his mum smoking in pregnancy.

DrNick Sun 16-Feb-14 13:33:07

i had similar but not the same.
I was cross,vERY cross ( well, stern really, not raging) and withdrew all money that i gave him directly or indirectly for a while, also told the other parent

never happened again.
I would say that teenagers need to see you as a figure of authority so avoid the friendly chat

Dollydowser Sun 16-Feb-14 13:35:28

I started smoking at that age (don't smoke now, it was just a phase). I did it to piss my parents off because they were very strict, never paid me any attention. I wanted to rebel. They were very anti smoking.

Reincarnatedpig Sun 16-Feb-14 13:37:08

It gets worse there is an white ovoid tablet at the bottom of the packet. Doesn't look pharmaceutical and doesn't look like a sweet sad

ImATotJeSuisUneTot Sun 16-Feb-14 13:40:19

I'd ask her, about the cigs and the tab.

This is an opportunity for you to make it clear that no conversation is out of bounds for you both.

You'll know if she's lying I think.

Reincarnatedpig Sun 16-Feb-14 13:40:19

Will take it to the chemist to be analysed.

Reincarnatedpig Sun 16-Feb-14 14:21:59

Well as suspected DD claims the cigs belong to a friend. She says the tablet was given to her by a friend for menstrual cramps but she couldn't swallow it. The tablet is 1.5 cm, not scored and with no pharmaceutical markings - is that possible?
Not home yet, in for a bollocking when she gets here.

TheresNoMeWithoutYou Sun 16-Feb-14 14:25:41

Maybe put a pic of the tablet on here? Get some help identifying it?

Innogen Sun 16-Feb-14 14:26:35

Your DD is lying.

Innogen Sun 16-Feb-14 14:27:42

Why would you save a painkiller you couldn't swallow.

Medicine has markings, OP.

Sorry you are going through this sad

CoteDAzur Sun 16-Feb-14 14:27:43

Touch the pill to the tip of your tongue. Does it taste vaguely familiar or very odd and bitter?

Cigarettes are not her friend's. Nobody who doesn't smoke carries cigarettes in their jackets.

Reincarnatedpig Sun 16-Feb-14 14:28:17

I can't upload no access to laptop or pc - only ipad and iPhone where it
doesn't work. White tablet, 1.5 cm oval shape. Not scored and no coating (unless it came off when dd tried it as she states). No markings. Seems too big for street drug as well.

WeAllHaveWings Sun 16-Feb-14 14:32:55

can you ask for friends mothers phone number to confirm the pill story?

Innogen Sun 16-Feb-14 14:33:08

Is there any chance it could be a bought-online, dodgy diet pill?

CoteDAzur Sun 16-Feb-14 14:33:18

Touch it to the tip of your tongue.

Innogen Sun 16-Feb-14 14:34:04

Weallhavewings, why would a friends mother know anything about this?

CoteDAzur Sun 16-Feb-14 14:35:00

Because if it is a legitimate pain medication, the mother will have seen it around in the house, presumably.

CoteDAzur Sun 16-Feb-14 14:35:36

Then again, all legitimate pills have markings on them. And I'm not talking about pictures of doves or peace symbols [symbols]

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