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Family holiday with inlaws

(9 Posts)
dontputmeinanoldcot Wed 17-Jul-13 19:37:08

WWYD-I have a 2.5yr DS and 4mth twins. Inlaws and DH want to go on a long weekend to the coast. They have a friend who lets out a 2 bed cottage cheaply. When asked if I wanted to go in August- a couple of months ago- i politely declined as the twins were still very new and I couldn't imagine anything worse - all squeezed into one bedroom with my DH and kids.
My mum has been helping me with the childcare but in August she wants to go home for a week. We stupidly thought that I could take inlaws up on their offer as being squished into one bedroom is a lesser evil than a week spent on my own with a toddler and baby twins. Obviously there is no availability for the dates my mum was planning on going home, but the inlaws have specified one weekend at the end of August that is free. So my plan backfired and I'm kind of committed to the weekend away. Pretty fed up and the inlaws aren't happy with me, grumbling to DH that I should have decided right at the start and not at the 11th hr,,,as they need to juggle a prior engagement. I quickly said to my DH that we can back out if not convenient but the inlaws are super keen to go. I'm happy for DH to go with DS but I got told off for being ridiculous and that we ALL have to go. It sounds nice but I've been to this cottage and the bigger of the 2 bedrooms has 2 single beds. So me and DH in a bed each, DS on a camp bed and twins in a travel cot. It's going to be tough because twins are used to cosleeping in a double with me and MIL is prone to suggesting cry it out methods if they play up. Twins are not placid babies. They cry A LOT. I can see this weekend being plain hard work as I do all the packing and bloody unpacking at both ends as DH does fuck all. If I give him a list he doesn't know where half the stuff is so I end up doing it anyway. I've semi fabricated a story that my brother from europe may be visiting the uk but DH is really piling on the pressure to go. Argh WWYD?

NobodyPutsTomArcherInTheCorner Wed 17-Jul-13 19:42:20

WWID? Lolgrin I did do it, or at least very similar. Ie baby twins plus not much older dd and in laws and dh. I will give you the benefit of my experience. The potted version.

Don't. Do. It.

Bowlersarm Wed 17-Jul-13 19:42:44

My three children are close in age but I don't have twins, so can't quite imagine how hard it is for you but....

Your DH really wants to do it (give him designated jobs), and it is only for a weekend, so i'd go if i were you and muddle through.

MadeOfStarDust Wed 17-Jul-13 19:44:17

Tell DH to take DS, there is not enough room, you will not be comfortable, it will not be a holiday or any kind of break.

purrpurr Wed 17-Jul-13 19:44:23

Re your DH not knowing where anything is, put labels on drawers, cupboards etc. I'm guessing if he doesn't know where things are kept in his own home, he doesn't do anything?

Tee2072 Wed 17-Jul-13 19:46:11

First, I would stop pandering to my helpless husband and tell him to sort himself out if he wants you to go.

Second, I would forget the first and just refuse to go. When DH asks why, reference my first point.

Third, continue with my first point in your every day life.

hermioneweasley Wed 17-Jul-13 19:51:38

So, you were willing to do it for a whole week when it was free Childcare, but now that has (unsurprisingly) not been available, you begrudge your husband's family one measly weekend when you mum sees you and the kids regularly?


I am really not looking forward to being a MIL

dontputmeinanoldcot Wed 17-Jul-13 21:20:22

Fair point hermione!grin
lets just say I panicked and lost my head at the thought of a whole week on my own with 2 screaming babies and a clingy toddler!

dontputmeinanoldcot Wed 17-Jul-13 21:34:06

Purr-he does the absolute essentials like unloading and loading dishwasher. Puts clothes into wash machine but can't quite manage to put clothes away when dry and clean, that sort of thing. Hasn't cleaned bathroom for last 5 years. Only does stuff if left explicit instructions.
Well, after a semi bicker, he has backed down. Told MIL he's not sure if he can take time off work and that I'm concerned about space. She thinks I'm being precious but I'd like to see her walk babies around all evening in a confined space!as a compromise we might pay for them to go into a b and b and we take the cottage but not sure if they will like that. They might get offended hmm

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