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Massive life decision- move to countryside or stay put?

(10 Posts)
hairymelons Wed 03-Apr-13 23:16:27

An amazing work opportunity has come up but it involves a move into the countryside, probably an hour or so from where we live now.

My main worry is that the kids will hate it and so will we :D

Basically, we would be IDIOTS to pass on this because we aren't in a good position financially and this would sort a lot of our financial issues out. However, DS1 (4) is very happy in his current school and we have a lot of family and close friends just around the corner which is also lovely for the kids. DS2 is only 2 so wouldn't have an opinion exactly but he loves seeing so many familiar faces come & go all the time.

The most complicated issue is that DS2 has some medical problems. He was very poorly at birth, had lots of surgery and is now doing well but his medical care is ongoing and we know and trust his consultant. Our GPs are also brilliant with him and understand his history so he gets well looked after by them.

DH grew up in the countryside and didn't have a very good time, especially as a teenager so isn't wholly sold on the idea.

I moved around a lot between the ages of 18 and 30, lived abroad several times and down south for 5 years and always hankered to come home and be near the people I love most of all. It's really nice being close enough to people to pop round and I like our kids hanging out with each other too, they feel like my extended family really.

I'd appreciate any thoughts really, this has been going round and round in my head for weeks and it's driving me a bit mad!

CandlestickOlder Wed 03-Apr-13 23:21:28

Money isn't everything and you can't put a price on having friends and family near.

CandlestickOlder Wed 03-Apr-13 23:22:09

And if it's only an hour away, why can't you just commute?

ShotgunNotDoingThePans Wed 03-Apr-13 23:24:27

Sounds like you have an absolutely lovely life and you'd be very lucky indeed to be able to come anywhere near replicating it in the country.
< Speaks from bitter experience >

ShotgunNotDoingThePans Wed 03-Apr-13 23:25:34

Yes why not commute?

wewantyouasanewrecruit Wed 03-Apr-13 23:25:46

OP I think you already know because your post sounds like a persuasive argument to come and live in town (or wherever it is you live now). Don't underestimate the fact that the medics all know your son (a big thing) and it is lovely to have familiar faces around you, as you said.

What if you made the move and it didn't sort stuff out financially? Are you sure you'd be idiots not to go?

hairymelons Wed 03-Apr-13 23:46:44

Yes I do already know what I want to do, I'm just not sure it's the right thing...

We have every chance of going tits up financially pretty soon so it sort of feels like there's no other option.

Commuting would be difficult (but not impossible...) as I work very long days and it would mean not seeing the kids at all 5 days a week. The idea is that this would allow me more family time as the kids would be on site. And I'm wondering if they'd be happier there getting more time with me and DH...although my aunt who does most of the childcare is well loved. Another reason not to go.

I'm mainly worried that I don't want to move because I'd have no-one to drink wine with on a Sunday evening! But really I'm worried about moving DS2's medical care.

expatinscotland Wed 03-Apr-13 23:48:20

Can you not move some place in between as a compromise?

ShotgunNotDoingThePans Thu 04-Apr-13 08:44:43

What's the 'tits up' part? (You don't have to answer this, obv). Are you struggling with your mortgage?

newfavouritething Sat 27-Apr-13 00:04:59

It depends on the type of 'countryside' - are you heading to Kent with a house in the corner of every field? Or somewhere quite remote? How far away from a 24hr tescos etc will you be? How much is a taxi ride back after a night out?

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