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Feeling like a horrible mother....

(3 Posts)
allie741 Sat 10-Nov-12 23:04:49

Hello; I need some suggestions as to how to deal with a silly situation, but because of how I have reacted to it, it is making me feel really guilty and like a horrible mother.
Here it is: Some time ago, my friends, our children and I went out for lunch, afterwards we bought some identical silly toys to all the children. Now, today; one of those friends hosted their yearly fireworks party. All the children were playing, and I saw my son and other children playing with that little cheap toy. Before we were going home, I saw that my son was still holding said toy. Without asking whether it was his or not, because I really thought that his toy was in his little toys basket at home, I made him give it back, although he said it was his, and that before coming to the party he had put it in his pocket. I then said "I don't believe you" and I also said "you are lying" my son, 5 1/2 was upset, and kept insisting that the little toy was his. I was completely sure that when we would get home I would find the stupid toy...and when I went to his wasn't there. I feel horrible because I called him a liar, and now it looks as he was saying the truth...but, I am still not convinced that it was my son's toy. Now he is sleeping soundly, but how do I deal about this tomorrow? do I call my friend? do I make my son look after his toy in his bedroom? do nothing hoping that my son forgets about it in the morning? I do remember when I was a child and my mum didn't believe me, it felt horrid...I feel like I broke his trust...what would you do?

InNeedOfBrandy Sat 10-Nov-12 23:08:19

You say sorry and get him back his toy tomorrow. It's not a bad thing to admit you were wrong and apologise, it actually teaches him a lesson and will not undermine your authority.

dampfireworksinthegarden Sat 10-Nov-12 23:10:27

let it go, Allie. unless your friend calls you to say that the toy is missing, then leave it.
if you are sure, however, that you WERE mistaken and that the toy really IS your son's, then apologise to him for calling him a liar.
get your child used to owning their mistakes, by recognising one's own.

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