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bullying on school bus

(21 Posts)
NellyJob Sat 22-Sep-12 11:42:50

We live 10 miles from the school in an area where about 60 percent of the children get to school on school buses.
There are some twins who live in our village who make dd's journeys so miserable I have to drive her in every morning. She has to take the schoolbus home, but it has become so bad that I sometimes give her the money to take the public bus home.
These twins constantly shout 'pigface' at her and make 'pig' noises, (she has a cute turned up nose) and they sit behind her and kick her seat.
I have complained about it in emails and went into the school to talk about it last week and was told that specific incidents need to be logged and witnessed, but how can I do that if I am not on the bus? I said that they have a busfull of witnesses but was told that' not every child will have seen it'.
One day last week I went to meet the bus and witnessed them myself, chasing her off the bus, shouting 'oink oink'.
Their mother just stood there smoking and watching them. According to her they are not really responsible for their actions because they have ADHD.
I told her to sort it out but the next day it was even worse. That was the day i went into the school.
WWYD at this point? It is making my daughter not wish to go to school and is costing a fortune in petrol apart from anything else.

exoticfruits Sat 22-Sep-12 22:21:17

Ask to see the school policy on bullying and make them follow it. Write to the governors if nothing happens.

DanFmDorking Sun 23-Sep-12 01:36:17

If what you say is true then this is appalling.

1. Keep a diary of the incidents and record everything that happens, date and time and what was said.
2. Write to the school about the problems immediately. It needn’t be long and rambling just short and to the point. “I am very disappointed to find that … My daughter is very unhappy at school because …”
3. At the end of next week, check with the school to see what has been done. Ask them what progress has been made regarding these problems.
4. If you are not happy that the problems are being addressed then take it up with the Headteacher. Ask what progress has been made regarding the problems.
5. You may choose to approach one of the Governors about the problems ‘I’m concerned about … I want to make sure that I’m going about this in the right way’. The Governor should check that the correct procedures are been followed.
6. How the school addresses parental concerns is a measure of how good the school is.

exoticfruits Sun 23-Sep-12 08:18:39

A good list.

Funnylittleturkishdelight Sun 23-Sep-12 08:25:42

Great advice from dan

fridayfreedom Sun 23-Sep-12 08:27:30

just dashing out but... mys son had issues on the bus too. School were actually very good but we also had a contract with the bus company which stated that if the child behaved badly on the bus then they could have their bus pass removed.
May be worth exploring this because I expect their mother would be mighty pissed off if that happened and she actually had to address the issue!!!
as for incidents having to be logged and witnessed, do they really think that other kids are going to 'dob in' these idiots, in practice they don't because they may turn on them. Your child reporting it is enough evidence.
Does the school have someone who deals with the buses, if so speak to them. After one incident I went into school at 8am and demanded to speak to someone there and then. It was then dealt with.
Good luck, it's so hard isn't it. But the little shits don't deserve to get away with it and your DD deserves help.

exoticfruits Sun 23-Sep-12 08:45:48

We had a letter home saying that if anyone caused trouble on the bus they would have their place withdrawn and have to find their own way. It works - anything that will cause I convenience and expense to the parents works. The mother can hide behind ADHD and do nothing -but I bet she would put a stop to it if she had to drive or get them a taxi!
Keep on the case - don't give up.

NellyJob Sun 23-Sep-12 09:27:17

thanks all for good advice which I will act on - we had that letter too fruits - but it all seems a bit meaningless -

exoticfruits Sun 23-Sep-12 09:34:49

If you had the letter it makes your case much stronger. It also intimates that there have been problems on buses.

NellyJob Sun 23-Sep-12 09:37:24

oh right - not a recent letter - I doubt i still have it, it was sent to all bus users at the beginning of year 7, we have now just started year 9. The teacher that sat there smiling and telling me every incident would need to be witnessed by another bus user made me so....angry

exoticfruits Sun 23-Sep-12 09:54:59

Has your Dd got a friend to act as witness or the person she sits next to ?

NellyJob Sun 23-Sep-12 10:01:30

hmmm there is one girl who would be strong enough but sadly she gets off the bus very early in the journey so doesn't see it all. Anyway I have suggested her name to the year head. DD does have other 'friends' on the bus, but it is very hard for children to 'dob in' as fridayfreedom said, for example one of them is only in year 7 and is probably just grateful it is not them.

antshouse Sun 23-Sep-12 10:04:47

Can you request a seat to be saved for her near to the driver. They can hardly say that there are no witnesses if he see what's going on.

NellyJob Sun 23-Sep-12 10:10:41

maybe I will do that.........I did suggest the driver to dd but poor guy is so busy driving a noisy bus on statistically the most dangerous road in the country, he is not really going to get involved...plus apparently his english is not great apart from that....

BlueberryHill Sun 23-Sep-12 10:13:03

Do they have CCTV on the bus or could your DD sit near the driver and then there is either a witness or they won't do it near him?

The teacher smiling and saying that every incident would need to be witnessed is awful. In courts of law, the victim gives evidence and doesn't need a witness to back it up, I don't see why a school needs a higher standard than our court system. Plus, you are a witness to one event, if you have that with a log of all events and if the other girl could be a witness to one / two events you are building up a pattern of behaviour so why do you need a witness to all events.

School sound unhelpful. Could you get a copy of their anti-bullying policy and see if they are following it?

BlueberryHill Sun 23-Sep-12 10:14:19

Oops cross post with antshouse but I would pursue it.

Tuttutitlookslikerain Sun 23-Sep-12 10:14:30

We had repeated bullying on the school bus last year. I was particularly impressed with the school's handling of it, TBH and eventually it spilled out into cyber bullying etc, so we went to the Police. The Police and School Transport Dept at the council got together and told the parents and children that if it didn't stop that the bullies would be chucked off the bus made to catch one from further away which would inconvenience them. The mother argued it should be my DS who got a different bus, but the police said no. To be fair, because,it would have been a logistical nightmare getting her little darling to another bus, she made him stop!

If I were you, I would contact your local council in the morning. They might be able to work with you and the school, and TBH, I hate bullying so much I wouldn't hesitate in calling the Police. Your DD has a right to travel on the bus, with her friends, without this nasty girls treating her like this.

Good luck.

Tuttutitlookslikerain Sun 23-Sep-12 10:18:08

Sorry, should read wasn't particularly impressed with the school

Theas18 Sun 23-Sep-12 10:22:30

Umm your dd must have a phone, what about some covert recording of the verbal bullying? And second sitting under the CCTV .
Get school anti bullying policy and school bus policy and take it with the evidence to the head.

amillionyears Sun 23-Sep-12 10:39:12

If all else fails,threaten to take it to the local papers.
You can bet your bottom dollar that the school will take more notice and action.

exoticfruits Sun 23-Sep-12 19:00:40

Threatening to go to the local paper always works! We have done it , but not about school. Write a letter-send them a copy and tell them that you will be sending it unless they can assure you that your DD can travel without being bullied. (I don't think that you will have to go through with it-they won't want it).

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