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buy A present for BEST FRIEND'S CHILD... DD not invited to PARTY...

(10 Posts)
catinhell Sun 22-May-11 10:33:06


one of my best friends has a 10yo dd just a few weeks younger than mine.

when they were tiny, we always went to each others' birthday parties etc.

as the girls have got older, they have developed different interests and although friendly, have little in common (one tom boy, one girlie girl).

also parties have got much smaller as theyve got older.

we still bought for each others' dds but stopped inviting each other to parties.

NOW, a few momths we moved to a new town, and now live v close to these friends, and the dds are in the same class.

my dd was allowed a big party as part of making new friends in a new town. my friend's DD WAS invited.

However, NEXT week is my friend's dd's party and we are not invited. it is a small party with other more 'tom boyish' friends, so totally 'get' why dd isnt invited and am not offended.

but... the question is, do i still get a present, or might this upset my dd by drawing attention to the fact that she wasnt invited. also, might it embarrass my friend if we get a present.

so... card only, or keep with our tradition of buying presents? it just seems different now that the girls are classmates... WWYD??

hulababy Sun 22-May-11 10:40:45

I'd still get a small gift and a card.

catinhell Sun 22-May-11 10:41:44

thanks. really tiny token? as in obv too small a gift to take to actual party?

catinhell Sun 22-May-11 10:43:06

shall i get dd to sign or sign on her behalf?
was going to def send card anyway.

FlyingStart Sun 22-May-11 10:43:57

Give a small box of chocs (Thortons do good ones for kids @ £2.50) and a card. Job done.

hulababy Sun 22-May-11 10:45:45

No, not tiny but a gift from you as a family to the child. But yes, you could get your DD to sign.

My friend has a son a little older than DD. We live int he same town, but they don't go to the same school. Infact said friend is DD's godmother. When they were smaller they always went to each other's parties but now they are older (now 9y) they don't tend to invite one another.

However, we still send gifts at birthdays and Christmas. DD will often be the one to chose and/pr write cards/gift tages, etc.

catinhell Sun 22-May-11 10:48:21

hula, was same for us but they are now in same class its 'feels' a bit different

BrawToken Sun 22-May-11 10:49:20

I'd get her a gift card for itunes or Game or something for £5 just so she knows there are no hard feelings and you still care.

ChippingIn Sun 22-May-11 10:51:39

I would just get a present as you always have, from your family. The fact that they are now in the same class is neither here nor there - they are family friends.

pramsgalore4 Tue 14-Jun-11 20:10:31

i have this same problem, we invited her ds ( well he kinda invited himself ) but when it comes round to his party alas no invite, i still buy him a present like i always have and will continue i am friends with her and my kids are friends with her ds, up to her who she invites but i wont be inviting him again or get in the situation of him inviting himself again works both ways, but i would never say anything actions speak louder than words!!!

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