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Has anyone read My Absolute Darling?

9 replies

GunpowderGelatine · 01/11/2019 23:01

I bought it a while ago and it's been in my book 'queue' but I didn't realise it contained a story about sexual abuse. I was sexually abused as a child and teenager - how triggering will it be??

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cyrilted · 01/11/2019 23:07

I have this book and gave up on it about a third of the way in. I just couldn't get into it at all. I need books to have me gripped and excited to read more but this just didn't do it. So not really answering your question about whether it's triggering but as it's a book I've tried I thought I'd give my opinion!

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lovelychops · 01/11/2019 23:08

I think it could be triggering for you sorry. I read it and found it very uncomfortable and I cant say I enjoyed it. The fact that its written by a man, for me, makes the abuse in it very... I dunno how to explain. I didn't like the way it was described. (Obviously I wasnt going to like that part, but it really jarred with me). I'm surprised I finished the book tbh.
Sorry i hope this makes sense. I didnt want to read your post and not try to answer your question. I'd be very wary if you're likely to be triggered
Sending hugs

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Jesuisclaude · 06/11/2019 13:18

I think it might be very triggering yes. I didn't think the denouement lived up to the beginning, in that it felt a bit thrillerish, and I was expecting something more ... i dunno, profound, maybe? To pay off the seriousness of the first half.

Very good writer though.

But this:

The fact that its written by a man, for me, makes the abuse in it very... I dunno how to explain. I didn't like the way it was described.

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GunpowderGelatine · 06/11/2019 21:01

Well I had a go at reading the first chapter then put it down. I'm absolutely horrified (and yes I was warned here so should know better!) that the author described the rape at the end of chapter one in such romantic terms and uses the word "pussy" to describe a child's genitals Shock how the hell has this book got so many rave reviews?!

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lovelychops · 06/11/2019 21:39

Brave of you to try Gunpowder.
I totally agree with your post. The way the author writes about the rape and words he uses are really jarring. Especially as it felt so different to the tone of the rest of the book.
I think it could have been a good book, but it's those descriptions which ruined it for me.

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RetreatingWeasels · 06/11/2019 22:51

I started this book ages ago and really just couldn't get into it. I hated the language and it didn't seem to have much of a plot. I gave up on it.

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Jesuisclaude · 07/11/2019 12:04

That's what I mean... I think if you are going to be so graphic about horrifying themes, you need to be doing it for a reason that really pays off intellectually and emotionally. For example, Lolita is one of my favourite books, because to me the real thing that it demonstrates is how EVERYONE let Lola down, how smug and hypocritical and disingenuous society around her was. It is a horrifying, mind-boggling, intellectually stretching read, there's a point he's making about what we as society are prepared to turn a blind eye to.

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GunpowderGelatine · 12/11/2019 15:40

So I went to donate this to the book bank today having given up after chapter one but I noticed there was an interview with the author in the back, which I read. When asked "What research did you do around victims of child abuse?", he answered "None" Hmm he didn't speak to a single victim. In short he felt it would hinder him if he heard actual experiences from writing something unique.

I'm annoyed I've contributed to him financially now.

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Jesuisclaude · 26/11/2019 12:55

The only thing is, he might feel that he would end up writing their stories, and thereby profiting by them.

I can see how that is very upsetting though. Flowers for you. What other kinds of books do you like to read?

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