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2 stone overweight, fed up, have toddler and little chance to exercise

(27 Posts)
MamaHobgoblin Thu 23-Jul-09 20:44:04

And I'm eating his food with him - I think that's half the problem! BLW is all very well, but if they're on full fat cheese, yoghurt, milk, etc, then that's what's in the house and that's what I cook with. If you're giving your baby/toddler whatever you're having yourself, you can't really give them diet food! sad

I didn't scale-watch before getting pregnant, but was certainly comfort-eating after a couple of mishaps along the TTC way, and I don't seem to have shifted that much pregnancy weight. Breastfeeding at 16 months, but not worried about cutting down and affecting supply, I know that won't happen. smile

Basically, I eat whatever I fancy blush, a bad habit from the dark days of sleep deprivation and BF round the clock. NCT meet-ups didn't help much either. Only exercise I get is walking with the buggy - am SAHM and always with DS, so no chance of going for a swim, etc. HATE the gym with a passion and can't afford the fees, besides.

What can I DO? I need a shake-up and a plan. Also need to stop pinching DS's cheese... Anyone in the same sort of boat?

MotherofInvention Thu 23-Jul-09 21:27:16

I was definitely in the same boat-put on loads of weight during and after preg. The Low GI diet really worked for me, as did exercise DVDs - I used to bounce around the living room during nap times and shed many pounds that way. In terms of eating, I eventually realised the problem was that I was so busy I'd forget to eat and end up snacking on rubbish, and at mealtimes I'd eat too little in a misguided effort to lose weight and then end up starving and snacking on rubbish again.

Learning about Low GI made me much more conscious of how to avoid getting so hungry (i.e. what to eat to stay hungry longer, good low fat snacks, many small meals instead of 3 main ones, etc.). Try to plan your meals a bit more so you can put something healthy and substantial together quickly. And build exercise into your routine - you could maybe go to an aerobics class/swimming at the leisure centre or running/fast walking in the evenings if you have partner who can babysit? Or do the DVDs in the evenings behind locked doors...

Make set days, say 3 x a week, and stick to them come hell or high water. I found that doing exercise immediately made me more motivated to eat well. Keep it up, and cut down on booze if you can - that's a fatbuster if ever there was one... Good luck.

coveredinsnot Thu 23-Jul-09 21:45:12

Yes, I could have written your post, although I am also working and studying so am VERY busy! I think the key for me is exercise. If I'm not exercising, I feel lethargic. If I feel lethargic, I want to eat more. The more I eat, the more I want to eat. And usually I eat pretty much whatever I want. I know I'm not likely to stick to a diet (too busy, don't go shopping frequently enough to plan ahead, have to eat in the car/on my knee/anywhere!). Also, if I'm dieting, I just think about food even more and I already think about it all the time, so really dieting is hell!!

I think Motherofinvention summarised how you should approach exercise, and the effects this will have on wanting to eat well. If you did an exercise video or joined one of those mother and buggy outdoor exercise classes (I think there's some called mums on the run or pushy mothers or something) so you could take your toddler with you, that might kick start you! Some gyms have really good rates - I joined LA fitness last week and they will waive the joining fee if you go 3 x week for the first 8 weeks. I think this is a good motivator! I work for the NHS so my monthly fee is £33 which I don't think is bad, especially if you consider how much it would cost to do a one off exercise class somewhere (round here usually £6 - £10).

So my advice would be don't worry about the food, and just start moving more. If this means walking faster with the buggy, or for a bit longer, then do it. A pedometer might be a good motivator if walking is your main source of exercise. I think you'll find the more you exercise the more in control of your appetite you will feel, and it will also improve your mood (not that you have any problems with this, but many people do).

God I'm sounding like an exercise freak - really, I'm not. I'm 2 stone overweight, breastfeeding a toddler, totally sleep deprived and drinking a beer as I type. But everything I've said above is true!!

MamaHobgoblin Thu 23-Jul-09 21:48:47

Yes, the booze... <hides glass of white wine> That would probably make a difference right there. As would refusing to cater for any more NCT cake stalls or coffee mornings! grin

The weather doesn't help - neither of us like it outside when it's raining. I need to get into a daily habit of going for a decent length walk with the buggy, and not kid myself that the supermarket run counts.

The food is still a problem - DS can't go onto low fat dairy at his age, or isn't meant to, anyway. I don't have the time to cook two separate lunches from scratch, and he wants what I'm eating anyway. And I snack all the time... Will look into the low GI thing and see if I can tweak it round DS's requirements.

Thanks!

MamaHobgoblin Thu 23-Jul-09 21:55:48

coveredinsnot - hey! same here! grin (bloody summer colds)

I agree I need to get moving again. I was better at this last summer (but then had a small baby who needed pram walks to get him to sleep...). We have a lot of groups we go to during the week, but things have stopped over summer, so I should snatch my chances to exercise while I can. I really want to TTC from this winter, and losing the weight was always my big priority before that happened, as I know that if I'm, what, 11 stone (and 5'2" blush) when I get pregnant, I'm pretty much never going to lose it.

I think it'd be great to go swimming one evening a week (would that make any difference, though?) and my partner would be happy to be on duty, but evening exercise when I'm feeling a bit spent from a day with a busy toddler....zzzz. I need to get my mindset adjusted, I think, and look on it as me-time. I've tried the gym several times and know that I can't stick it, so I don't think that's going to work this time. Will try and rack up some walking.

Commiserations about the sleep deprivation. sad That's one thing we no longer have to cope with, thankfully, or exercise would be the last thing on my mind!

coveredinsnot Sat 25-Jul-09 10:21:20

I agree it's SO difficult trying to find the time and the energy to exercise. I'm feverish at the moment too, have LOADS of work on which I'm going to have to do all weekend, and I just feel like total crap!

I've thought about joinng weight watchers to try to get me to think about how much I'm actually eating, but I hate being told what to do! I know it wouldn't last. Ugh... what to do?!

And I'm 5'2" as well!!! (I'm sure you're me! This is quite odd...!!!) and I weigh 12.5 stone at the moment blush. My partner is a darling and says I'm fine as I am, but I feel awful, all blobby and horrible, and I know it's unhealthy to be so overweight. And now I have a son, I feel even more strongly that I should be taking good care of myself, but something just isn't happening. I have such a big appetite, I can't handle being hungry - I feel like throwing up when I'm hungry!!

What can we do?!

Annner Sat 25-Jul-09 21:29:46

I'm 5'2" and am only a little way further along the road. My DCs are now 4.9 and 2.9, and it gets so much easier once preschool gets under way. To put it into perspective, I was 11 and a half stone when DS was born, and can totally relate to the snacking, eating of their food, grazing and generally moving at the speed of a toddler.
I have got started really gradually over the past year. I took up pilates and gradually started to feel myself toning up a bit under the flab. This was before I had any inclination towards dieting! A class one evening a week should be manageable if your DH/DP is at home. It is also lovely and relaxing mentally - think yoga without the new age-y spirituality stuff. I started it to work on my appalling pelvic floor and prolapse but soon began to look forward to the classes and felt myself getting stronger.

After a year in denial that I wasn't bothered by my weight I bit the bullet and decided that I needed to get some cardio vascular stuff in. Same problem as you with time: by then I was at work again, and just didn't have any. So I bought a rebounder (mini trampoline) and started boinging, just for ten minutes or so at a time before meals, gradually building up to a good 30 minute jog three times a week while DH was at his exercise class and Cubs during the week. Oh, and pedometer helped to encourage me to walk the long way round when out with the children, to look for opportunities to zoom around the park, etc. I'm now feeling brave enough to start the couch to 5K running programme.

That spurred me on to work on the food, so I found Foodfocus through Mumsnet and began to record all that I ate, working out how much I should be eating. I'm now 10.3 stone, en route to my target of 9.9.

To summarise it all, I suppose that the key thing is that every little tiny thing that you do does help and make a difference, and is motivating. I try to see setbacks as just "not helping" rather than being "bad" and look at where I've come from rather than how far I still have to go. Breaking it down into small chunks, helps too: i.e. to be ten and not eleven stone, to lose first of all half a stone, then 5 kilos, then a stone, etc. I've been overweight all my adult life, and I'm aiming this time to build a healthier lifestyle more than I am simply to lose weight. Mumsnet helps hugely! Don't aim to lose more than 1 pound a week, and you won't miss out too much.

I cooked with low fat cheese etc once my children were two. Some recommend squirting uneaten toddler food with washing up liquid so that it becomes less tempting...

coveredinsnot Sun 26-Jul-09 10:40:18

Great advice Annner really inspiring story, and great to know that you did is so steadily without making a complete drastic overhaul of your life. Also LOVE the idea of squirting leftover toddler food with washing up liquid!! Reminds me of the phrase I need to say to myself more often: 'I am not a bin! The food is better off in the bin than in me' So difficult to override the feeling of wasting leftovers by throwing them away...

canttouchthis Sun 26-Jul-09 10:58:38

I'm also a SAHM but bought an exercise bike and use this 3 times a week (when DS is in bed - so around 7.30pm for 30 mins). If there's a will, there's a way.

I can't afford membership to a gym but using a bike means I can exercise from home, I don't have any fees to pay at the gym and don't need to drive anywhere to do my exercise. It is in the home which means I've no excuse!

I also like to snack but tbh, when I exercise regularly I'm less inclined to snack. V odd! However, my waist is shrinking and very comfy now in size 12 jeans again (don't feel like I've rolls of fat hanging over them like I used to!).

It can be done, if you are willing to make the effort. I had to psyche myself up to doing the exercise and I've not looked back since mid-May.

You may also want to look into hypnotherapy to help with the weight loss if it is really troubling you. It has high success rates.

MamaHobgoblin Sun 26-Jul-09 20:34:22

Should we start a new thread for overweight mothers of small children who are 5'2"? grin

Thanks for all the support and advice. Am cringing at the idea of squirting washing up liquid on my lovely homecooked food, rejected by DS, but can see its merits...

I used to do WW - while I was working away from home, pre-DS, I lost loads and was briefly down to just under 9 stone! But I also hate being told what to do, and I'm also very into my food and the foods and recipes prescribed by WW are frankly appalling. grin I'd rather eat less and well - just need to get back into that mindset.

Maybe I should get some sort of fitness aid for at home, then. Do you really lose weight boinging on a mini trampoline? (DS would love one of those in the house!) I have zero willpower and self discipline, but the goal of losing weight before starting to TTC again is a good one! (Am extremely broody...)

fatslag Sun 26-Jul-09 21:33:58

Can I join? (but I'm only 5.0!)

I am currently doing 1200 kcals a day and it is working well. And I've found that cutting down on sugar means that you don't get hungry.

My trick is that I don't count fruit and veg in my 1200 kcals, it seems ridiculous to ever eliminate f&v from your diet (same as weight watchers), but don't eat bananas, avocados, nuts and stuff... I am used to cooking 3 different meals for 4 of us, the "plain" version with hidden veggies for the kids, the "exotic" version for DH with lots of colours, herbs and spices, and then some kind of low fat low cal something for me. You get used to it!

I have tried so many versions of different dieting tricks, and have come to the conclusion that simply cutting your calorie intake and noting everything that you eat really does work.

I will probably be posting on here in a week confessing that I have eaten 3 mega bags of crisps and 5 bars of chocolate, but until then...

Annner Sun 26-Jul-09 23:05:16

The latest (and most exclusive!) weightloss club. If you're more than 5 foot 2 ....

I have found that boinging is pretty good. Massive claims are made for it, e.g.here but even though I can't find exactly how many calories an hour it is meant to burn off, it certainly seems to be more effective for me than calorie counting alone. I bought the Reebok one mentioned here in Argos, and I only paid about £30 even though the same one was on Amazon for £50.

FoodFocus reckons that for me to lose 1lb a week, I need to take on board 1428 net calories a day. Your net calories are the number that you eat minus exercise calories. So in Tesco terms, every little really does help. I just count time on my bouncer as "jogging", or fast walking when I've been slightly sluggish. Over time you can even run on it, boing, jog, and as long as it gets your heart racing, you're exercising. I've just done my first two runs in Couch25K (well, jogging in intervals with running, really) and felt that the rebounder had helped me to build my stamina and strength, even if my poor body was unprepared for the hard impact of pavement running.

You need to store it where it is easy to get out, but exercise when you don't have to leave the house is far more appealing than having to heave yourself to the gym once the children are in bed. And the sofa is sooo handy for afterwards... Oh, and you can do it in front of the TV. I often watch Ch4 news, jogging in the main bits and then trying to run hell for leather during the ad breaks.

Whatever you decide to do, start with a small change, and don't introduce the next stage until the new thing has become habit. That way it's more likely to last.

Good luck, and keep posting, Annner

Annner Sun 26-Jul-09 23:07:15

Oh, and chucking out beautiful homemade food still hurts, four years on. sad

I remember ranting in the annoying early toddler days that I could just make food and then chuck it straight in the bin, and cut out the middle man. Hmmmmm.

peppapighastakenovermylife Mon 27-Jul-09 12:52:03

ooooh...can I join in? I am not 5ft 2 i'm afraid but do have a 3 yr old and 10 month yr old, a job and am studying...and a bad summer cold grin

I am 13 stone and would just be happy to lose a stone of that at the moment. Two stone would be great...am never going to have the will power to get any lower.

Eating seems to be the only thing keeping me going. I swear breastfeeding makes me retain weight too. I am doing ok on the exercise front - had been going out for a run three times a week before this damn cold. I just cant stop eating junk - its my life line.

Have managed to get to nearly 1 pm only having cereal for breakfast and soup for lunch though

I so need some motivation.

fatslag Mon 27-Jul-09 21:04:45

grin annner for the "throw it straight in the bin" approach. My ds2 is like that as well.

I also use a Glen somebody self hypnosis cd to brainwash myself into eating less. Who knows, I'm being pretty good so far (3 weeks of dieting, 3 kgs down) so maybe it works?

Concordia Mon 27-Jul-09 22:10:09

oh, peppa pig can i join in the 'not 5ft2 but 13 stone (exactly said the scales this morning) with a 10 month old and a 3 year old. ' club? Oh, i'm on maternity leave and only studying in name only, so i don't quite qualify.
I find with being at home with the children i don't get much time to excercise. we don't have family support and if i can talk DH into supervising both children i tend to clean the house sad was going to go for a run today but decided to clean the kitchen floor and vacuum the lounge. because 10 month DD is now crawling around eating all the bits of mud / 3 day old food etc in sight hmm
i have been on low GI diet for two weeks now, and feeling a lot lot better for it, not always hungry like usual, esp in the afternoons. But only lost a couple of pounds.
in general i really try not to finish off baby / toddler food and just throw it but sometimes i can't resist. it's the cheese that gets me.
i need to excercise and think perhaps i should buy either - some DVDs or an excericse bike or similar. my parents had a treadmill but it was such poor quality you couldn't walk above a certain speed on it let alone run - so that kind of put me off. Do you need to spend a lot to get something good?

thatsnotmymonster Mon 27-Jul-09 22:36:41

Can I join too? I am quite a bit taller too though grin

I have a 4yo, 3yo and 1yo. So have all the same problems. I am so hungry whilst making yummy food for the dc's I end up eating it too. They are always hungry so I need to have loads of snacks in for them.

If I try to exercise (dvd, wii or trampoline) when they are around they just hijack it. I am too tired in the evening when dh comes home at 7.30pm. Have been going out running but really difficult to keep it up.

I am 13.5stone and would like to lose 2.
Am thinking of trying the hypnotherapy thing and have just registered on Food Focus.

I am starving now. Dinner was at 5pm as was at a friend's house and she cooked pasta for all of us (loads of cheese etc in it).

Might have some smoothie.

coveredinsnot Tue 28-Jul-09 18:25:48

Food Focus seems to be helping me a lot - I love graphs!! Makes me feel a bit competitive about losing weight, which is exactly what I need to feel... grin

MamaGoblin Tue 28-Jul-09 23:26:09

Annner, you've almost convinced me to buy a rebounder! I was planning on going to the local Argos this week, too... grin

Is it noisy? One of the things I'm wondering is if I can do some home exercise during DS's precious naptimes without waking the shallow-sleeping little love up... hmm

I've been trying to fit in more walking, and today went to a PYO fruit farm and bagged lots of lovely stuff - and then bought a (small) bag of toffee popcorn in the farm shop! Whyyyyy? And what are they doing selling toffee popcorn in a farm shop anyway, that's what I want to know?

But otherwise, since I started this thread, I've been consciously refusing alcohol (no matter how much I think I deserve it) and opting for water rather than juice. And not using DS's fullfat milk on my bran flakes. grin

coveredinsnot Wed 29-Jul-09 21:45:25

Arghh I've just finished a beer. Poo.

I'd like to know if you can use one of those mini trampoline things when you live in a flat. Will I make the windows shake, and the old lady downstairs' light fittings wobble?

Annner Sun 02-Aug-09 21:39:47

Hello again y'all... Mrs Rebounder here again.

MamaG - you get the sort of noise that will get the neighbours' eyebrows raising nicely - lots of per-doing-ing and twanging. You need to turn the TV up to hear it at the same time, although you could use headphones, I suppose. But we haven't found it hugely noisy, as I usually boing just after the children have gone to bed, and they don't hear anything.

Coveredinsnot - I'm not sure about using on a first floor, to be honest. You could put it on a square of carpet or yoga mat, or even those foam ELC playmats to cut down on any effects below. That said, mine doesn't move around and I use it on laminate. The ones with six legs like Reeboks are more stable than the cheapo ones with only four.

I didn't lose any this week sad but have my period, which is always a cue for some excellent fluid retention. BUT I went shopping with a friend and (drumroll) got into and bought the first pair of size 14 trousers that I have been able to wear since my early twenties grin Very exciting weekend, then. My rebounder is currently feeling unloved, as after using it three times a week for three months I have started the couch25K running programme, and am two runs into Week 2. So far, so good, and I'm in one piece.

MamaG, every little first step makes a difference! That old mantra is so true - if it took nine months (or more) to go on, it's going to take as long again to go. Great.

If it helps, why not try posting one thing a day that you have done that has sent the smugometer off the scale, i.e. opened a bottle of wine and didn't have any; got off the bus one step early; took the stairs in M & S instead of walking, etc.

Mine is ... ignored seconds of nice homemade lasage and stopped at one portion.

Good luck!

llareggub Sun 02-Aug-09 21:48:14

I've lost about 2 stone by exercising more. I have a baby and a toddler and try and do a Davina workout 3 times a week. I also use the wii fit to jog and do yoga. My eldest son needs lots of exercising so we go out for lots of walks. We also have a trampoline and I bounce for about 10 minutes a day with my son.

Evenings are my worst time for raiding the cupboards so I always get the ironing board out to stop me picking at food.

I have cut down on my sugar intake too, but I pretty much eat what I want. Exercise is key for me.

MamaGoblin Tue 04-Aug-09 09:34:53

Well, my baby flab is still here twice as long after the baby as it took to go on! It's my eating habits - I have to change them. I'm going to go to Argos and get me one of those things, but god knows where I'll store it between times - garage, probably.

(Annner, BTW, I'm not MamaG, she's someone else! grin)

Llareggub, do you like the Davina workout? What sort of exercise is it?

sarah293 Tue 04-Aug-09 09:39:10

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LeonieSoSleepy Tue 04-Aug-09 09:55:46

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