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Body Clutter Be Gone - The Fledglings' Weightloss Thread

(412 Posts)
JigoloHarMegiddo Thu 23-Jul-20 12:04:20

Morning all!

To avoid derailing the ongoing Flylady threads in housekeeping, and to give some space to people who aren't trying to declutter their person as well as their house, I thought I'd start a separate Flylady weightloss thread.

I'm really hopeful some of the other Fledglings will hop over and join me, but if not, I'm happy just to talk to myself on here.

Flylady's approach to weightless is the same as house cleaning - focus on little, helpful routines to make bigger changes in the long run. She has a couple of pages on the website dedicated to them, but by the looks of it would really like you to buy her book 😂.

So, is anyone going to join me in decluttering the pounds?

OP’s posts: |
EasilyDelighted Thu 23-Jul-20 12:33:25

I'm in. Back later flowers

LittlemissAWOL Thu 23-Jul-20 12:39:12

I'm also in!

Thanks to my new scales weighing me heavier I'm actually starting my first week with a 9lb gain but 🤞 it should start coming down now. Won't mention the 2 tunnocks tea cakes I've just eaten 🙊

LaneBoy Thu 23-Jul-20 13:12:47

I am so in grin

I’m assuming this thread’s naughty corner will be stocked with fresh fruit, iced water and a lot of lovely salad? grin

I like the idea of a separate thread - familiar faces and chat but I could be more specific in ta da lists like what exercise and stuff. Good for motivation smile

I have done my boxing game today, there is a “daily workout” feature and I also did extra practice of the new moves. It’s not much and much as I love the game I know from past attempts at similar things that my arms flare up quickly so I am not going to do more than the daily bit for the moment while I get used to it, especially as I’m also wanting to increase weight training a bit. Ooh that reminds me my Decathlon order is in so I can hopefully collect that tomorrow yay!

I was super hungry by the time my fast ended today and I had too much cereal. First time I really felt I’ve over eaten when the time runs out - I need some better options for when I’m too hungry to make decent choices!

JigoloHarMegiddo Thu 23-Jul-20 13:13:59

Teacakes will not be mentioned, AWOL, fear not!

I find myself this morning having put on 10lbs in lockdown. It could be worse, but I was back to my top weight from last summer this morning!

My maximum healthy weight (BMI 25) at 5' 4.5" tall is apparently 10st 5, although that takes no account of build. This means I have a minimum of 3st 5lbs to lose, which is rather sobering. Although I'm aware there are rolls of fat to shift, I don't really feel any different from when I was 9st 8, a decade ago! I fear a) turning 40 b) having a hysterectomy c) takings ADs and d) the sheer amount shit the family have been through since then have taken their toll.

So, my clever plan is low carb / keto eating, some walking (also for mental health) and, in the fullness of time, HIIT / weights. But not all at once or I'll fall over. I am not tracking anything except weekly weight and my emotional response to food, as otherwise I get obsessive very quickly.

OP’s posts: |
JigoloHarMegiddo Thu 23-Jul-20 13:27:35

Lane, I specifically wrote myself a list last night of meals I can eat, to prevent hunger-based decisional paralysis. It's what I've had to do for DD and DS3, don't know why I thought I'd be any different! 😂

My exercise plan at present is to aim for 6,000 steps a day for the next few days. I'd done that by 11am today (early walk for me, dog walk, dentist, quick Tesco trip) so I think that's a good sign. The next test will be whether I can do it again tomorrow!

OP’s posts: |
LaneBoy Thu 23-Jul-20 13:43:23

I need to do an activity type list along those lines too actually meg - when I’m struggling MH wise I can’t make myself do the nice things that help me (drawing, reading etc) - I need to prompt myself before I get to that stage. A food one is a great idea!

Re ideal weight, I actually can’t imagine being at mine. I have been bigger since starting secondary, and my frame is definitely not wiry. So I don’t have a weight aim in mind really, as long as the scales are gradually reducing I’m happy for now. Baby steps, right?

squanderedcore Thu 23-Jul-20 14:47:58

Thank you Megiddo this is a fab initiative! Really grateful to you flowers

I'm in quite a depressed state about my weight atm. I always used to be thin. But the weight has crept on in the last 6 years or so. And I can barely get up on a horse, never mind ride one properly now beyond a slow amble. One year post hysterectomy, my core is non-existent.

Now = 93 kgs = 14.6 stone. (I am 5ft 8 and a bit/172 cms.)
Need to lose approx. 30kg (4.7 stone-ish).

Ultimately want to reach approx 63 kg = 10 stone but would be happy with 70 kg initially . I have a thin frame; thin hips, wrists and ankles which basically means I carry all my weight ahead of me, and you can see my bust and stomach enter the room before I do blush And I have quite a few weight-related health issues: creaking painful joints, particularly knees, and basically feel crap and sluggish.

@ 0.5 kg per week over 52 wks = loss of / 1 kg a fortnight ie 2kgs a month @1400 daily calorie intake.

6 month goal = lose 12 kgs by the end of December 2020
ie get to 81kg = 12 stone, 10 pounds.

To be honest though, when I look at these figures, I am already thinking "this is just impossible".

12 month goal = lose 24 kgs to get to 69 kg = 10 stone, 9 pounds by mid July next year (July 2021).

Beyond that = from 69 kgs possibly another 6 kilos to lose from July to December 2021 to get to 63/65 kgs but realistically I will probably pause at 70kg.

[Please can someone kindly tell me if those figures are wrong.]

Trouble is our whole life tends to revolve around food. I live in a country that is obsessed with it. My dh is obsessed with it. My family is obsessed with it. I thought it would be better under lockdown as we are not socialising as much but dh has been baking bread, cakes, experimenting with local dishes, ordering loads of different ingreds etc etc and I have the willpower of a slug. And I am popular with my family if I cook, in a way that I am not popular if I clean and organise.

Also I feel rather depressed atm. I am conscious I shouldn't feel this way as we are fortunate in a thousand ways. But for various reasons, there is a lot of stress in our life atm, over which I don't feel I have much decision-making power or control, which can be very demotivating. Part of this is to do with the personalities involved and part of it is situational and part of it is firmly in my court as I haven't taken the bull by the horns.

In summary, I've been advised to take ADs by the doc but haven't so far because I only feel depressed in town and not in the country.

Anyway, anyway, in short. I really want to do this but I am not in a great place atm (menopausal, post-hysterectomy, fat, bit depressed, stressed by business and family dynamics in which I don't have a lot of control). But that means I need to do it even more ifyswim as it becomes a vicious cycle.

Hope that wasn't too much info blush

Good luck everybody! We CAN do this! We really can.

The methods I am using at the moment (since mid-July so not very long) are: drink more water, cut down on biscuits/cake/ice cream etc, don't have seconds, log everything on MFP (but find this quite time-consuming and I don't always get it done) and eat 2 meals a day instead of three. Or if I eat three, I try and only eat half portions of the three ifyswim. Leslie Sansome and Lucy Wyndham-Read for exercise. And usual dog-walks. Exercise steps up considerably when in the countryside. Low carb makes me feel physically ill and if I'm honest, I'm not sure about any eating regime that cuts out an entire food group (but that's just me!) but I am trying to cut down on bread and only eat small portions of rice and cous-cous, and even smaller of pasta. Upping veg intake mahoosively. French women eat 12 a day apparently! I also need to be far more consistent than I am currently.

Heigh ho! Onwards and inwards! grin

squanderedcore Thu 23-Jul-20 14:48:21

Cripes. Sorry. That was far too long blush

EasilyDelighted Thu 23-Jul-20 15:21:03

I'm trying 16:8 mainly because it wipes out an entire meal (breakfast) and my main danger time which is pre-bedtime snacking.

Other than that, slow jogging, yoga, plenty of water, very little alcohol, 5 a day.

I've been overweight since my 20s when I first had my own home and kitchen and could eat whatever and whenever I
liked. I've tried WW (years ago), SW (last year, worked up to a point but the meetings were at awkward times and I didn't like the emphasis on low fat food substitutes), mfp which made me obsess with calories and low-carb high-fat / blood sugar diet which made me feel worse both both physically and mentally. However I have friends who swear by low carb / keto.

JigoloHarMegiddo Thu 23-Jul-20 15:46:23

I think what this is demonstrating is that one size definitely does not fit all! I'm very aware keto makes some people very unwell; but giving up grain is something I have to do for the sake of my knees, which were buggered before I turned 40 and are now definitely feeling the strain of extra weight as well. The (composite) mantra I'm trying to live by is "Just Eat Real Food: mostly plants, not too much" and see how it goes from there. I'm very aware that if I break the seal, so to speak, and have one sugary thing (cake / ice cream etc) I then can't stop, so I have to be vigilant.

I know exactly what you mean about family stress making it worse, SC. I feed people because I love them, and it makes me feel needed when they like what I cook. And I grew up with a model of eating my feelings, so I eat if I'm sad... If I'm happy... If I'm angry... If I feel worthless... If it's Thursday etc; and when I had 3 DC under 4, I ate sugar to stay awake. I remember being in hospital after DD was born and working my way through a packet of chocolate digestives overnight in an effort not to fall asleep and drop her.

Lane I really like the idea of a list of go-to, non-food happy things to do; and go-to exercise options. I used to do Lucy Wyndham-Read but I seem to have lost my mojo there.

I'm really glad the fasting is working for you, ED.

OP’s posts: |
squanderedcore Thu 23-Jul-20 16:36:31

I'm totally with you when it comes to eating foods that are as non-processed as possible Meg and very much agree that what suits one person, may not suit another. And tiredness is a huge factor I think. That definitely can become a downward spiral as the more lacking in energy one feels, the more one tends to eat carbs/sugar (well I do) and that leads to more fatigue and so on.

And in the midst of a busy family life (yours much busier than mine!!) it's so hard sometimes to have the focus to eat "mindfully" when you have 102 things crowding in to your mind. But at least we are aware and that's the first step I reckon!

merryhouse Thu 23-Jul-20 17:15:39

I don't think I eat emotionally as such though there were times in my past life when I browsed the kitchen simply because I was bored. Food is so nice! I remember my sister saying "my problem is, I use food to make my life interesting and fun" - since then I've been consciously trying to find other interesting and fun things instead of having a snack.

Doesn't always work grin

I never had issues with weight when I was young, so escaped a lot of the emotional baggage some people get. However, I do think I have certain emotional issues that cause me to self-sabotage whenever I get close to my target. Years ago one of my sisters commented on my (kind-of post-partum) weight loss and added "you always were the slimmest of us"; and half a decade later I realised that was the point at which I started to gradually put weight on again...

I also have a thing about Not Being On A Diet, which I don't feel ready to get rid of right now but needs serious consideration.

Last time I weighed myself - before lockdown! - I was 70.7kg which is a BMI of 25.7; with a fat mass of 29.2% which according to the machine at the gym is athlete level (hahaha) but according to the table in the gym's own app is somewhat above ideal (I'm wondering whether it hasn't realised I'm female) and is all very vague and inaccurate anyway. In fact I've just googled and other places say 21-24% is fitness and 14-20% athlete, so there you go. My waist:hip ratio is still under 0.8 but both are a bit bigger than they were in March...

I'm still doing an exercise class run by our karate club, originally 3 times a week but only twice at the moment (I was immensely pleased with myself for doing something something similar on my own yesterday). I need to start going out for walks again (which I actually enjoy) and maybe limit the home-made ice cream to every other day? Perhaps also get the Wii Fit board out - oooh, it's just occurred to me that it will weigh me if I ask it to.

LaneBoy Thu 23-Jul-20 18:07:41

Ooh I really miss Wii fit! I wish there were more games like that on the switch (the ringfit one looks good but not as fun, and is £££).

SC don’t apologise for writing lots - it’s helpful for all of us! We’ve ended up discussing deeper reasons behind clutter etc before on the fledgling thread and now thanks to our lovely meg thanks we have somewhere to discuss the weight stuff too. And anyway, there is zero point starting some eating regime without at least trying to understand the reason for the gain in the first place, right?

It’s really interesting what you’ve said about how much happier you are in the country, and that you don’t feel in control of family stuff. All worth thinking about.

Totally agree about different approaches. I found low carb easy in pregnancy - I had to do it to keep GD under control, and I lost weight even as the bump grew, but doing that for Cagletini was easy - and I knew it was only for a matter of weeks. I’m trying to use a little of what I learned still but I know restricting anything doesn’t work for me - so delaying is a “safer” method.

Who is this Lucy person? Is there a particular video (am assuming YouTube) you’d recommend? I’m enjoying my own workouts but I get bored sooo easily so anything to mix things up would be good.

JigoloHarMegiddo Thu 23-Jul-20 18:37:15

Lucy Wyndham-Read is a you tube fitness expert. She can be irritatingly skinny and perky, but her workouts are between 7 and 15 minutes, and they really do work. The Drop A Dress Size one I've linked to above is very effective (although I'm not sure it was a total dress size - but it made a difference!). She offers reasonably sensible nutrition advice as well, and targetted plans at a cost, but none of them suit the way I need to eat (she majors on whole grains, avocado and banana!).

Anyway, she has massess of stuff on Youtube included seated workouts for people with movement difficulties, if you're sore, so it's worth a look.

Her facebook group can be a bit full on, though!

OP’s posts: |
MrsTidyHouse Thu 23-Jul-20 18:45:46

megiddo thanks for starting this thread. I really need it.

My goal is to incorporate cooking and eating into my daily routine, in the hope that it all becomes automatic and takes up less space in my head. I'm very aware of the ideal weight for my height, but that weight has proved unattainable for so many years that I don't expect ever to reach it. My initial goal is to get my bmi under 40, and keep it there.

Low carb suits me best, and also more salad and veg. My eating disorder is triggered by stress, mostly around family issues that are beyond my control. Today was especially bad, partly due to not thinking ahead. I looked through some items that brought up painful thoughts, and handled some family stuff very badly later on.

JigoloHarMegiddo Thu 23-Jul-20 20:32:31

I hope this gives you a space where you can work out your thoughts on food, then, MrsTidy. I'm sorry your food difficulties are tied up with family relationships, and hope you can put down whatever happened this afternoon.

I have definitely found having a list of meals to choose from much easier today. Because I did the evening dog walk too, today I have done 9,600 steps! My goal was 6,000, so I'm pretty pleased.

I know what you mean about goal weights being impossible, SC. I can't get my head around the idea that this time next year I still might not be where I want to be - because life often intervenes and then I eat cake - so I'm looking at this a week at a time. I will celebrate each half stone, but I'm not planning any more than that.

I might treat myself to a lovely planner for this, though...

OP’s posts: |
MrsTidyHouse Thu 23-Jul-20 22:24:04

Oh, it all took an even more convoluted turn this evening. In all honesty, I was much happier in lockdown, when I could ignore just about everybody. Now it seems as though that calm is gone forever, in the space of a few rubbishy days.

Anyway, after a small binge, I've discovered a wee gem on the Scottish tv channel, and am now planning tomorrow. I also had A Good Idea re school and after-school care, made a couple of phone calls about it, and feel much more positive about August.

It'll be nice to have this thread to just ramble away. Thanks megiddo

KTCluck Thu 23-Jul-20 22:28:58

I’m in!

Thanks for starting the thread Meg, and you should absolutely reward yourself with a lovely planner.

Sorry you’re feeling low SC, hope you can get back to the country soon.

Small steps will eventually lead to the big goal Tidy. Sorry today has been tough flowers

I was always fairly slim and could eat what I wanted until I hit 30. I got back to my target of BMI 22 by going to SW after I had DD and was breastfeeding. I kept it off for while even after she was fully weaned, but then over the last year or so I put on over 2 stone and wasn’t far off hitting the obese line.

I started Noom around the end of Jan I think (similar to MFP but with articles around psychology of eating, goal setting, stress, mindful eating etc) and I’ve lost 8lbs up to now. That’s been a bit up and down though as I’ve been on and off ‘the wagon’.

My current target is to get back to healthy bmi (only 5lbs now I think, it suddenly seems possible), then it’ll be another 18lbs to get back to target. My main challenges are to stop being a couch potato, and to learn moderation. I love that about making life interesting without resorting to food Merry. Food is absolutely my go to for celebration, comfort, to make myself feel better, rewarding myself, relaxing and entertainment. There’s far more out there though.

We’ve got this ladies!

EasilyDelighted Thu 23-Jul-20 23:00:34

I'm like that, using food for comfort and reward. I think some of mine goes back to childhood, my mum was always on a diet and depriving herself and I didn't want to be like that, ironically she is a now a lot slimmer than me, she has a much healthier diet, very little processed food, pretty well everything cooked from scratch. I am partial to processed food such as crisps and takeaways unfortunately, although I do enjoy cooking and am pretty competent.

Did ok-ish today. I am going to have to be careful on days that I'm at home not to get to lunchtime and hoover down crisps or whatever because I'm starving, that did happen today with a pack of doritos before lunch.

HungryHazelEyes Fri 24-Jul-20 04:40:39

Oooh, I have to join in on this thread too, thank you Meg for starting it. As I've mentioned to you before I'm mostly low carb/ keto. I was doing really well, started in 2018, in January, mostly stuck with it, even through the loss of my dad that year. I have had a hard time since November 2019 (Thanksgiving over here). I had lost 27 pounds in that time, but gained back 17-18 pounds. I know that it's easier over time and I start to not want the carbs, it's just the initial getting back on the wagon I'm having a hard time with.

I will be happy if I lost 17 pounds, ideally 22, but know that might never happen. I'm 5'7" and weigh 172 pounds as of this morning. I would be happy weighing 155 pounds. I do find I lose weight when I track using mfp, but get mad at myself for needing to log everything in order to see the scales move.

Meg I'm sorry your mum made you feel like you needed to lose weight from the age of six, I couldn't imagine that! My dad kept telling me I was fat the last time we visited as a family before he got really sick, so I have that memory and him as a frail old man that needed help to sit up, less than 2 years later. It's tough for sure, and still something I'm fighting with.

Sorry I wrote an essay as well!

THATscurryfungeBITCH Fri 24-Jul-20 05:55:20

I'm just going to watch for a bit if thats ok .... not sure i am ready to commit yet

JigoloHarMegiddo Fri 24-Jul-20 08:10:59

Of course you can just observe, That! You've got a huge amount going on, and weightloss, sadly, is not usually something that takes care of itself in the background.

I was a plump child, like my Dad, which DMum found perplexing more than anything else. She was tiny and lithe and sporty, 5' 2.5" as an adult and a hulking 7st 10lb when she got married. She "ballooned" to 8st 2lb putting on the Honeymoon Half Stone! I remember when I first realised I was unacceptably fat in society when my friend and I were pretending to be Abba, when we were 6 ish, and said "friend" told me I'd need a corset if I was going to be in her group, and I asked my Mum to make me one. I think that's probably actually what pushed Mum to try to help with my diet.

4 DC of my own and lots of diagnoses later, I realise that 1) I don't have a lithe body shape. I am solid. My ribcage is never going to be less than 34", even when I was very skinny (Mum was 28", at her heaviest). The Welsh miner, from my Dad's side of the family, has come out strongly in me! 2) My undiagnosed hypermobility made it uncomfortable to run around, so I did reading instead and it became a vicious circle. 3) I have been fighting my weight ever since then. I was skinny (for me) in my teens, after I took up ballroom dancing and practiced for an hour every night. I got married at 9st 2lb, with a 24 inch waist, in a (wedding dress) size 12, through sheer hard work, and have dipped below 9st at various points with the heartbreak diet / workplace bullying / extreme control / swine flu, but it's not a natural place for me, whatever anyone else may think. Genetically, both my grandmothers and 3 of my great-grandmothers were "well padded" in their later years. Only one of them was a little bird-like old lady, like DMum is turning into. I'm a bit stuffed, in that regard.

OP’s posts: |
EasilyDelighted Fri 24-Jul-20 15:06:09

I'm just going to write down a thought from yesterday so I can come back and remind myself. I met a friend of a friend for the first time yesterday. She was probably a similar age to me (early 50s) but she was slim, tanned, toned, and looked fantastic in short denim shorts and a white cotton shirt tucked in and belted. I'm going to try and remember her when I lapse, I'd love to look a bit more like her. She seemed lovely too.

LaneBoy Fri 24-Jul-20 16:21:18

Aah it’s lovely to see so many of us!

I set the boxing game to a 20min workout today and it felt more like proper exercise. I also need to remind myself how much better I feel wearing my gym stuff! I’ve been in jammies for a couple of days 😳 but decided to get dressed into them and do the exercise and it has made me feel a bit better.

I must plan some lunches again as I forgot today.

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