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Weight loss by being kind to ourselves? *title edited by MNHQ*

(267 Posts)
millifiori Tue 29-Aug-17 13:11:35

Holidays over. I have had my body weight in ice-creams, chips, pasties, burgers etc and though we walked about 5-10 miles most days, I'm heaviest ever.

I know I am useless at diets - they make me dizzy and weak and grumpy.

Does anyone fancy trying to lose weight with a shift of mindset? Doing loads of treat-like things that aren't food based. Eating really healthy foods we also happen to love, Being nice to ourselves mentally, physically, emotionally and socially etc. Taking exercise because it's good self care etc?

If anyone wants to try this, join in here for chat.

Today I walked back from shops with (superfit and skinny) DS1. 3 miles. This afternoon, I'm going for a walk with DS2. Going to have some salad for lunch now because I like salad, not because it's rabbit food.

Anyone else?

millifiori Tue 29-Aug-17 13:12:39

Forgot to add:
Start weight: 11 st 7lbs
Height 5 ft 3.

millifiori Tue 29-Aug-17 13:15:39

Title is supposed to say: Weight loss by being kind to ourselves. Have asked MN to alter it.

applejack18 Wed 30-Aug-17 10:27:20

I'm in!

applejack18 Wed 30-Aug-17 10:29:46

Def agree being kind to oneself and self care (for my mental health), for setting the right example to my daughters and for improving my marriage - better self esteem - happier wife - less shouting - for me it's all interlinked
Mindful eating - no junk in house - an eye on calories but not actual counting.
Height 5 foot 2
Current weight: 11 stone
Curvy frame - massive boobs
Enjoying exercise and I know it will be even better when I'm lighter

BillywigSting Wed 30-Aug-17 10:40:56

I'm 100% in with this!

I've rejoined weight watchers at 12 stone and only 4ft10. I'm so achey and miserable and uncomfortable, my skin is a mess and I'm exhausted (no surprise considering I'm lugging around an extra four stone)

Been going a few weeks and the weeks I have taken the time to be kind to myself and eat delicious healthy food i actually enjoy instead of having whatever dp is having because it's easier have been much more successful than the weeks where I haven't.

Enjoying walking (and occasionally running after very fast) ds who is nearly four.

My mum has recently finished training to be a yoga teacher so we do that together once a week, helping loads with the tight achey muscles that come with being a fatty.

Taking note of when I eat in anger or boredom and making a concerted effort to tackle the root cause instead of just eating a few biscuits.

Looking at food as fuel and taking the mindset that I want to fuel myself with the right foods, you wouldn't put diesel in a petrol car because it'll do it no good.

Realising that treats taste so much better when they are genuinely occasional, not just a habit.

Gymntonic Wed 30-Aug-17 12:58:57

This really resonates with me. I get healthier when I'm on holiday as I have time to think about what I want to do and eat. Otherwise it all goes in a blur and I end up eating what's left over and putting my workouts at the bottom of the list. Then run out of time. I'm in
Picnic today. Have spent ten minutes prepping healthy and tasty salad instead of having butties like the kids. Looking forward to it

OddBoots Wed 30-Aug-17 13:05:57

This is a philosophy I can get behind.

I am sure it is something other people know but I heard a new (to me) concept of crowding out not cutting out. To fill up both food and time with healthy happy things so there is less hunger for the unhealthy things.

I have started by treating myself to relatively expensive pre-made soups fresh. I'd normally feel guilty at the costs but they fill me up in a healthy way so I am pushing the guilt away.

FlightyMare Wed 30-Aug-17 14:18:47

Yes to all of this! I'm approaching my new improved eating plan as a way to be kind to myself and to look after my body, and most definitely NOT a diet or deprivation regime. It's the only sane way grin. It's the same way that I've giving up drinking, and it's a revelation - who knew not drinking wine would actually feel great and I don't miss it one jot. It's just how you approach things I think.

Masonbee Wed 30-Aug-17 16:17:28

I think this is a lovely idea. I'm 5 foot and 12.5 stone (clearly this is also a thread for the petite amongst us!)

I like the idea of crowding out too. It's the first I've heard of it!

I went on a stress busting run over nearby hills in the rain this morning and I'm trying to drink more water, lovely and refreshing!

millifiori Wed 30-Aug-17 16:45:39

Brilliant. Just stopped work to find there are a few takers for this chat group.

Applejack Thanks for being first to dive in. Iagree that not having rubbishy food in the hous ehelps, though DH just won't agree with this, and buys stuff anyway so I need to shift in attitude so I don't want to eat that stuff. We need to find some healthy snacks that DC love. I do popcorn and also roast cheap chickens and leave them in the fridge for them to pick at, but we need a few more.

OddBoots - I love the idea of crowding out. Do you know much more about it? Fresh soups sound wonderful too.

Billywig Like you, I'm on a mission to find instant stress-busters that can take the place of comfort eating. Life here is very stressful right now - lots of family illness and lots of demands on my time beyond work and DC. One I've done in the past is a quick youtube video of a favourite uplifting song. Can help a bit. Do you have any?

FlightyMare I fancy giving up drinking Sun-Thurs, so it's just a weekend thing. Love the taste of alcohol but hate feeling drunk.

Gymntonic great username. That's the spirit ;)

MasonBee I love the idea of a rainy, hilly walk. Had a short walk with friend and dog up the local hill and back through the woods - about 45 mins in all.

Yesterday - two walks - into nearby town and round a lovely garden - total 14k steps. Healthy food all day but also had two glasses of rose. It had been a very tough few days (sad news0 so I decided not to get all uptight about it.

So - do we want to just chat or do we want a bit of structure?

I'm aiming for:
a daily walk for an hour minimum
10 mins HIIT or kettlebell a few times a week, say 3-4 (so I don't feel like a failure if I miss a day)
40-50 daily squats while brushing teeth
a daily pamper after dinner in that dodgy time where you feel the need for a bit of comfort: nails, feet, skin, hair, meditation, mini facial, candlelit bath etc
Get back to yoga when it restarts
Aim to swim once a week with DS, who needs to anyway for physio, so that's good motivation.

What about you? Dailu aims or just stay kind to yourself?

what are your best alcohol free not-fattening tipples?
best healthy snacks?
best non-food rewards?

By the way, we are all shorties on here so far but big tall women are welcome too! grin

Gymntonic Wed 30-Aug-17 17:10:30

I'm 5'11 so plenty tall enough! Have managed 20,000 steps over summer but will have to aim for 10,000 minimum from September. And daily physio exercises to build up my core and back 5 times a week- 10 minutes but so often don't 'find ' the time.

millifiori Wed 30-Aug-17 17:53:21

20k steps a day Gym? That's incredible. We walked everywhere on holiday and only managed 20k+ about three or four times. And we all felt it the next day. Guess that shows we're unfit. How do you manage it? And what shoes do you wear?

applejack18 Wed 30-Aug-17 18:01:47

Structure please!
My daily aims:
Min 2l water
Active (either gym, jog or big walk)
Sensible eating
Sensible bedtimes
Better grooming
Weekly aims: meal planning and house decluttering (the letter esp for mental health)

Shall we have a weigh in day? I absolutely don't want to be Slave to the scale as the number affects my mood but otoh also need some monitoring/accountability
Also really aware now that a monthly tracker might be fairest of all due to impact of menstrual cycle.

GreyandGrumpy48 Wed 30-Aug-17 21:02:20

Can I jump on too please. 5'1 and 12.3. Desperately need to get my activity up and my diet balanced but I need to be kind to myself when doing it.

Octopus37 Wed 30-Aug-17 21:11:39

Can I join please, I am 5ft5 and last Saturday weighed 9st7, petite frame, this was my weight at 7months pregnant so not good. Doing well so far, on day 5, not going to weigh myself for a while cause if I am loosing will make me slack off and if not I will be demoralised. Like the idea of the kind to yourself mantra, as not feeling too kindly towards self at the moment as am a bit disgusted with myself for letting weight gain get this far. Fresh soups are a great idea, and for me ready meals that aren't too high in calories also work well. Good luck to everyone else

Masonbee Wed 30-Aug-17 21:47:39

I want to share all of @applejack's structure! I love the idea of a pamper session in the evening too!

I'm happy to do a weekly weigh in if (some) people would like to- I've never tried it before!

I'm having licorice and peppermint tea as my evening drink tonight- I don't know if that will serve as a non alcoholic tipple @millifiori?

I would love some nonfood reward suggestions too- all the ones I think of involve buying myself something (books!), which I can't really afford to keep doing grin

WishingCarrot Wed 30-Aug-17 22:08:15

Me too please :-)

I'm 5ft0 and about 8.5 stone.
My downfall is sitting on the settee of an eve eating 😳
I'm due back in work soon after maternity leave - so will be more sedentary for part of the week
Also about to start weaning my dd off the boob - so can no longer kid myself that I have worked off 500 calories a day breastfeeding

millifiori Thu 31-Aug-17 07:59:00

OK, Let's do a weekly weigh in on Saturday mornings because I'm hoping most people will have a bit more time then, than during the week.

I'll send out a weekly list of rewards and mini challenges we can do if we feel like it (no pressure, no 'failure' if you don't) - one a day, for the first week, then hand over to someone else for more suggestions.

I'll post that on Saturday too, so we can spend the few days until Official Start Saturday 2nd September getting ourselves prepared and organised.


Get hold of all the things that might help you succeed in advance. e.g:
-notebook (for journalling, record keeping, bucket listing etc)
-nail polish/remover/buffer, files etc for a manicure session
-cleanser/toner/hot cloth/facemask/steamer for a facial
-pedicure kit - pumice, clippers, footcreams etc
-a great book you've always wanted to read

-your trainers/running shoes smile
-home gym equipment - kettlebells/weights/stretchbands etc
-gardening gloves and tools
-old fitness dvds you've not undusted for years (Hello, Jillian Michaels ;) )
-browse youtube for HIIT/5-10 min workouts you like the look of and save them to favourites

-Make a long list of ALL the healthy foods you actually love eating. Get some in.
- Look up/dream up some recipes that use them. You already know what sort of eater you are. If low carb helps you, go that way - if low fat bulked out with loads of veg and some wholegrain carbs feels better, work on that.
- Get in some herb/fruit teas (only if you like them!)

Fact-finding mission of prep week
What's your physical or emotional weakness right now that makes you turn to over-eating? Pinpoint it and do a bit of research online about the best, healiest foods to combat it (e.g. best diet post partum/menopause/anti depression etc.)

Remember, none of this is setting you up to fail. If you don't do any of it, meh, you're human, stick around and try again next day/week.

millifiori Thu 31-Aug-17 08:01:27

Typo - I meant healthiest food but healiest works too. grin

millifiori Thu 31-Aug-17 08:03:00

Hello Grey Wishing and Octopus - welcome.

ibuiltahomeforyou Thu 31-Aug-17 08:21:29

I love this! I'm doing Slimming World and the weight is dropping off but I want to get to grips with the psychological side of loving myself and not punishing/rewarding with food.

I am another short one! 5.2 and currently 9.10 - started at 11.7 in June. I might go and stock up on pumice stones, facial kits, etc today! I'm breastfeeding round the clock

NotMyMonkees Thu 31-Aug-17 08:30:00

I need this! Have had a terrible few months where mood/health/weight/activity have spiralled out of control. Had already decided to challenge myself to focus on self care when the schools go back, but a group will help me keep focused. So far I have dug my multivitamins back out and started taking, and dusted off my herbal teas. Good luck everyone, we deserve this 😁

NotMyMonkees Thu 31-Aug-17 08:31:26

P.s I'm another one on Team Tall! No idea of current weight as seem to have lost scales, but definitely in the overweight/obese category. Am trying to focus more on health than weight though.

Gymntonic Thu 31-Aug-17 08:47:54

Milli that's a great checklist. On holiday til Sunday without scales so will weigh in on Monday this week if that's ok. I reckon about a stone and a half off would be good for me though.

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