if you were fat for years then lost weight, where did your motivation come from?

(47 Posts)
DancingDuck Sun 03-Jan-16 11:04:21

My problem is motivation. I have none. I know I am fat. My clothes are uncomfortable. I look colossal in photos. I've never dieted for longer than about five or six days, Most diets I think I'll try last half a day or less. Don't really trust myself to have the self discipline or stamina. I hate feeling hungry and get so grumpy about it. generally I eat quite healthily but the portions are too large (I'm short but DSs and DH are beanpole men and eat vast amounts. I match them. hmm With snacks on top and a glass of wine every day, I am way over on calorie intake every day.

How did you gain motivation if you had none before? What tricks did you use to stay motivated?

OP’s posts: |
StealthPolarBear Sun 03-Jan-16 11:06:38

The horror of realising I'd probably get type 2 diabetes or have a stroke in the next decade or so. It suddenly felt real.
I already had joint pains which i hadn't connected to my weight. They vanished after the first couple of stone.

amitha Sun 03-Jan-16 11:10:32

I was in WW and various other diets for years (10+) unsuccessfully. Then i got diagnosed with MS and preserving my health became my no 1 goal. Changed my diet completely, started exercise, my condition improved a lot and lost all the weight, that was nearly 5 yrs ago and i love feeling so much healthier, so many niggly health issues (not related to ms like hayfever, joint pain, bad skin) just went away, of course being lighter is better for me too.

DancingDuck Sun 03-Jan-16 12:04:04

Both for health reasons, not social acceptance, vanity or romance. That's interesting. I am permanently absolutely knackered. Like someone has drugged me. Maybe losing the excess weight would help with this? (About 2 stone overweight.)

OP’s posts: |
StealthPolarBear Sun 03-Jan-16 13:29:16

Yes it did for me. I'd been lugging around all this extra weight, I seemed to have so much more energy.

StealthPolarBear Sun 03-Jan-16 13:30:25

That said I was about 5 stone overweight, so much more than you. I could lose 2 stone now!

pippistrelle Sun 03-Jan-16 14:31:39

Maybe it's like they say an alcoholic has to reach a low point before they can begin to reform, and possibly at just two stones overweight, you haven't reached the point at which losing weight is more important to you than not. Not that I'm suggesting you shouldn't bother, because clearly, you want to do something about it.

My motivation was vanity and embarrassment driven. I felt my outside was showing the world how out of control I was. Consequently, I was avoiding doing some things I might otherwise enjoy because I felt uncomfortable and embarrassed. Also, I wanted to sort out my bad relationship with food in order to set a good example for my daughter. That's a work in progress, and I think it always will be for me.

Good luck, OP.


RubbishRobotFromTheDawnOfTime Sun 03-Jan-16 14:54:11

I had gestational diabetes during my second pregnancy, which was a wake up call. I didn't want to develop full blown T2 diabetes later on. I held on to my testing kit and checked my fasting blood sugar occasionally post birth - it showed pre-diabetes. This was enough motivation to get things sorted. I knew I couldn't keep going forever with no lifestyle/diet changes without developing T2D and other illnesses so the sooner I did something, the better it would be. Also I wanted to look better and have an easier time choosing clothes, tbh! I've really enjoyed this part of losing weight.

Having had some experience of a better diet while managing my blood sugar during pregnancy (I was able to stay at the same weight from 28 weeks to birth, meaning I effectively lost weight) I knew how to go about it. Just cut out snacks, reduced portion sizes and carbs e.g. one slice of toast instead of two or three, one sandwich not two, the recommended portion size of pasta or rice.

I either skip breakfast if I'm not properly hungry or have some full fat plain yoghurt with a handful of mixed nuts and seeds. Then for lunch, a three egg omelette with lots of veg (I use frozen chopped peppers, onions, mushrooms, spinach etc as I'm looking after my 4yo and 1yo and only have one hand free usually) or a piece of toast with a big salad and a protein element e.g. small amount of cheese or hummus, or tuna. Soup's good too.

Dinner, lots of veg with lean protein and some rice, noodles, or pasta usually. Wholegrain carbs as much as possible. Processed food as little as possible. Fill up on vegetables. Drink only tea, coffee, water and wine smile but I need to cut down on the latter as I've hit a plateau and was probably drinking too much anyway.

Don't eat unless you really are hungry. This changes your attitude to eating. And try to make your calories count, nutritionally. It's a permanent change you're making, not a short term weight loss plan. I still have things like mince pies and chocolate but take it into account and don't go overboard.

I'm also doing some weights when I can - ten minute Youtube arm, back and squats workouts and trying to get as much movement as possible into my daily life which is hard when in charge two small children. Things like standing/walking at playgroups instead of sitting down and joining in at soft play!

End result, since last April I've lost around 4.5 stone, going from BMI 37 to BMI 28. Still one stone to go to top end of BMI but I'd like to go down another stone after that. I feel so much lighter, more energetic, healthier and definitely look better.

I see you only have 2 stone to go. You can definitely do it! You'll feel better for it. Make sure you get enough sleep as well smile

iwantbrewstersmillions Sun 03-Jan-16 14:58:09

That's why I need SW. It's not for everyone but knowing I'm going to a meeting every week keeps me focuses

DancingDuck Sun 03-Jan-16 16:52:13

Robot I need to do what you're doing. That sounds so sensible, and a good way to live. I have trigger times of day, 4pm is the worst. I can eat healthily at breakfast and lunch, and at dinner. And I don't snack in the evening while watching TV very often. But at 4pm I can put away 600-900 calories in the blink of an eye. If I could crack that habit it would be a start.

OP’s posts: |
Francescal88 Sun 03-Jan-16 17:01:31

Mine wasn't for health reasons - by time I was 24 I'd got to 17.5 stone. I queued for hours to go on Collosus at Thorpe Park only to be too big for the harness. I saw people pointing at me, I had to get off the ride and wait for my family. I lost four stone in seven months after that.

Bookaholic Sun 03-Jan-16 17:03:58

About 10 years ago I decided that I may as well make peace with being fat, I always had been and always would be so thought I should get used to it. I started reading all kinds of fat acceptance literature - blogs, books etc - and though 'bugger this for a game of soldiers!'. I lost about 8 stone over 18 months. I have put about 6 of them back, but am back on the way down again (have lost 1.5 stones in the last couple of months)

Nothing else hit that trigger for me, and I could pretty much pin point the moment at which something in my brain flipped and I decided not to be fat any more.

I have no idea whether I'll lose a substantial amount again, but I am already feeling a lot better and have a lot more energy. I've no idea if this is 'real' or a placebo effect, but I'm enjoying it.

DancingDuck Wed 06-Jan-16 07:39:41

Bookaholic - really interesting that you were motivated by acceptance literature. How did you lose and why did you regain do you think?

OP’s posts: |
beardsrock Wed 06-Jan-16 20:15:17


When some idiot on the street said 'She's beautiful, shame she's fat'. And laughed loudly.

He did me a massive favour, that idiot.

beardsrock Wed 06-Jan-16 20:16:04

Obviously it wasn't just that.

But he did me give me an 'I'll bloody show you!" attitude grin

beardsrock Wed 06-Jan-16 20:18:37

'That's interesting. I am permanently absolutely knackered. Like someone has drugged me. '

This is too much sugar, I can guarantee it!

MNetter15 Fri 08-Jan-16 16:44:10

After 5 years or so of ignoring and being in denial about my weight, I just randomly weighed myself one day. Entered figure into bmi calculator - obese. That was day 1, and I am now in the healthy range.

I was just fed up of being fat, really. Things like avoiding social events, people, no confidence, not wanting my picture taken. I just didn't want it to be like that anymore.

Raasay Fri 08-Jan-16 17:01:49

TBH, two stone to lose isn't actually that much. You could easily lose that much by Easter.

It's not about denying yourself food it's about eating different things.

Your 600 calories at 4pm could be much better for you if you switched to fruit for example.

I lost 5 stones after my DC were born. People didn't recognise me in the street I looked so different.

Get yourself to a class, SW, WW whatever is near you. Go every week, even if you don't have a good week. There are lots of offers on just now and slimming classes are always friendly.

I find Pinterest quite motivational, make a board of all the cool clothes you would wear if you were slimmer (that you can't wear now) and if you are having a wee crisis have a look at your pins to recharge your motivation.

Just think, if you start now an lost only 1lb a week you'd be two stones lighter by July.

2lbs a week you'd make it by the Easter hols.

There a good meme I saw on FB which says, losing weight is hard, being fat is hard.

Choose your hard.

toffeeboffin Fri 08-Jan-16 18:49:09

Honestly Dancing, two stone isn't much at all. As Raasay says, you could lose it by Easter.

Cut the wine. Cut the choc/cake/crisps. No lattes/cappucinos etc, just coffee with milk.

Eat smaller portions. Less bread and pasta, more protein and veg. Eg, swede mash instead of potato mash. Pile of broccoli, carrots, steamed spinach with each main meal. Home made soup before every meal.

Snack on protein and fruit veg snacks.

Drink loads of water.

I know you said your meals are healthy - but if you are overeating then it counter balances the health aspect.

Would you mind posting a typical day's food?

toffeeboffin Fri 08-Jan-16 18:50:20

At 4pm instead eat:

Two hard boiled eggs
Hummus and veg sticks
Cottage cheese and apple sauce
Big bowl home made soup
Apple spread with peanut butter

Themodernuriahheep Fri 08-Jan-16 18:56:42

Bump, some of the most useful advice I have ever seen on here.

SeasonalVag Fri 08-Jan-16 19:10:47

I can recommend
1. Eating soup. A pint of soup has about 350 cals a pint and it definitely fills you up as much as a lunch.

2. Chicken breast again v filling. 300 cals ish

3. Baked potato....under 300


No sugar

TwoTonTessie Fri 08-Jan-16 19:13:14

I was in a rut, hated my job and was feeling,fat,frumpy and middle aged. I was also fed up every time I went clothes shopping as nothing I liked fitted me very well.
I joined a local SW club,have dropped 3 dress sizes in under 6 months and love clothes shopping now. I also have a new job and feel a lot more confident. I just stopped eating bread,cakes,biscuit's etc and ate healthily with occasional chocolate treats. I've found it easy - 3.5 stone lost in under 6months. The hard bit will be keeping it off but I've thrown all my big clothes away now so don't intend to go back to how I was. Good luck flowers

GiveMummyTheWhizzer Fri 08-Jan-16 19:47:43

I didn't want to still be huge when I turn 30 later this year.

6 stone off last year. Couple more to go to get to a size 14 from current size 16.

Sootyboysmum Fri 08-Jan-16 20:25:10

I joined slimming world and invested in a good cross trainer and the weight flew off and i think writing down what you eat during the day helps as you can see what you have had aswell as snacking on fruit you enjoy!

good luck

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