Holy CRAP. I just got weighed and I need help!

[MrsGyllenhaal]

Hello.

I am in shock. I just got weighed. I have been avoiding the scales since DC2 was born 18 months ago. I knew I was big. I feel big and my clothes look awful on me. I am 16 stone!!! How the hell did this happen??? .

I am 5ft 9" so SHOULD apparently weigh somewhere between 10 to 11.5 stone. Such a long way to go.

I need to do something about this. I feel crap. I get out of breath when playing with the kids. I try and avoid most of the physical activities with them and manage to 'volunteer' DH for it. That's bad is't it? They'll grow up knowing their mummy is fat and lazy. I can't let them think that. I need to change this starting NOW!

I have suffered with postnatal depression after the bith of both our children and when I'm depressed I eat. Problem is, I don't eat healthy food. I crave KFC, chocolate, fizzy drinks. I do take the kids swimming once a week or so but with a 5 year old and an 18 month old, I do very little actual swimming, more just splashing about and keeping them safe. I also do walk a lot. I don't drive so I walk everywhere but should really make more of an effort.

I am so out of proportion. My waist could probably pass for a size 14- 16 which I don't mind but then my bum and my hips are measuring about a size 20! Consequently nothing fits nicely. It's either faaaar too tight around my bum and legs or fits OK around my bum but drooping and gaping around my waist.

I need to fix this. Any tips? My friend recently lost 4.5 stone on slimming world but it seems fairly complicated. I'm not the best cook and DC2 is still fairly young and needs a lot of supervision so I don't get a lot of time to faff about in the kitchen.

Another one of my friends has lost 4 stone on Weight Watchers. This might work for me. I need to stick at whatever I choose though. I can't carry on getting bigger each year.

So this is me. I am 29 yrs old, married, 2 kids....and nearly 6 stone over weight! Anyone else out there?

I am aiming to get down to 10 stone 5 and I'm not too worried how long it takes. I want to be healthy.

I have 79lbs to lose! Anyone want to join me?

Does anyone know if losing this much is possible without surgery? Will I have loads of excess skin left over? Is it do-able?

Thanks x

[KatoPotato]

Of course it's do-able! I've finally hit the 60lbs down marker with 10 to go!

I did it through calorie counting and exercise, using myfitnesspal and the MOTIVATION board here at MN.

I've lost it slow and steady, 1-2lbs a week, sometimes maintaining, no excess skin here!

You can do this! I still eat a little of what I fancy in moderation, I've never felt better, please feel free to join our board!

[BoulevardOfBrokenSleep]

Yeah, that's do-able, and at only 29(!!) I think your skin will be fine.

I lost a couple of stone with Rosemary Conley, basically ignoring their eating plan . All I really needed was the aerobics session and the knowledge that someone was going to weigh me each week, to motivate me. And then I just cut out pints of icecream stuff that was obviously bad and did a bit of WiiFit.

But that was only to get me down to a size 16, going further would need to be a bit stricter.

[Lizzylou]

Firstly, at 5ft 9" you can be up to 12 stone, so you "only" need to lose 4 stone to get to healthy.
Sounds better, doesn't it?

There are so many diet plans out there, you need to find what works for you.
I would certainly say that please do not see it as a "diet" though, whatever you choose choose because it is a sustainable way of life for you, or else you'll put it all back on! Break the weight down into manageable chunks, have a goal of 1stone to lose in first 3 months say. And please remember that you didn't gain weight in a matter of weeks, so it won't come off in a matter of weeks. Be patient.
Really consider exercising as well. Whatever you enjoy.
Look at Myfitnesspal too.

You can do this, you honestly can

[MrsGyllenhaal]

Thank you both. I am relieved to hear you both say it's doable! I don't even know where to begin with healthy eating. The thing is, I know I over eat. I don't eat when I'm hungry, I eat ALL the time! I eat because I know there's somthing yummy in the cupboard. I eat because DH is eating. I eat because my 5 year old is having a snack! Very rarely do I eat because of hunger. I don't think I ever allow myself to get hungry. I LOVE food. I like the act of eating. It's such a hard habit to break. But I have to!

Thanks again. I need some serious motivation!

[MrsGyllenhaal]

Thank you lizzylou. 4 stone sounds a lot less than 6 doesn't it?

I am just wanting to break the habit of gaining weight. All my adult life I've been getting bigger and it needs to stop. I hate specific exercise but I don't mind being active, walking, biking, swimming. I just can't stand gym or dance classes, that kind of thing.

I'd love to be 10 stone 5 but I need to aim small for now. One step at a time.

It's taken me all my adult life to get to this weight so I appreciate it's not going to drop off over night. I want to do this right and make long term changes. Still daunting though.

[FourLittleDudes]

I lost 6 stone about 7 years ago, I couldn't get to slimming classes and didn't have the Internet and didn't want to give up nice food so I used to put some music on for an hour every day and dance around, doing housework or something at the same time but still moving and singing along, using enough energy to work up a sweat but having fun too. Sometimes I did it a couple of times a day. I suppose it was like doing an exersize class every day or something.

I also swapped coke for diet drinks or Pepsi max type drinks and stopped taking sugar in my tea (but still had half a pack of biscuits!) and stopped eating bread.

It took 7 months and I went from a size 22 to a 10, 16st 6 to 9st 8. I kept all of it off until I had ds3 2 years ago and went in to a size 16, lost some again and then had ds4. I'm at a size 14 now and really want to be slim again but can't be bothered at the moment.

[MrsGyllenhaal]

WOW! Fourlittledudes, that's amazing! All that weight you lost. That must have felt amazing, especially without crazy dieting. See that's what I'm scared of, starving and being miserable or not being able to stick to it and just piling it all back on. I need to do something that won't feel like I'm being tortured. Thank you for sharing your story and advice x

[glenthebattleostrich]

Break it into bite sized chunks. I started slimming world in Feb with 4 stone to loose. I aimed to have lost 1 stone by my little girls birthday at the start of May, My next aim is to be 12stone by the time I go away for my friends hen weekend in a month, I have 6.5 lb to go to reach that.

My next goal will be to be 11.5st for the wedding at the start of Sept.

Eat healthily, don't cut out any food group, lots of fresh ingredients and exercise.

And the belief that you will do it.

[BettySwollocksandaCrustyRack]

Problem is, I don't eat healthy food

Problem is, you are going to have to do healthy foods if you want to get this weight off. MFP is a brilliant phone app which will track all your nutrition, calories and exercise and you can link up with friends, looks at their diaries and get loads of inspiring ideas.

Just aim for 7 lbs at a time, as aiming for 5-6 stone straight off is too daunting. Like you say small steady steps and remember 1-2 lbs weight loss a week is perfect and the slower you lose it the longer it will stay away.

Keep up with all your walking as well and good luck :)

[Lizzylou]

I have lost 19lbs since January, which doesn't sound a lot. But because I have been exercising, I have gained tone and definition.

I was always after the "quick fix" before, cutting out food groups/bad stuff/eating strange diet food in astronaut pouches. So I have yo-yo ed for nearly all my adult life.

Now I exercise a lot, I have found stuff I enjoy and I do allow myself to let loose on occasion, have just got back from a weekend away where I ate and drank a lot. But I also know how to rein it back in. I genuinely feel happier in myself and my eating habits than I ever have. I would like just under a stone off, but I am in no rush, just keep doing what I am doing.

Look at MFP. I guarantee you will soon be thinking differently about salads and healthy veg/fruit etc. You can eat so much more of them than a crisps/chocolate and junk.
It sort of re-focuses your mind to seeing food as fuel, fuel to be enjoyed but if you want to splurge on one thing, you cut back somewhere else to keep the balance.

[MrsGyllenhaal]

Thank you for all the fantastic advice and words of encouragement. I am feeling inspired by you all. Well done to everyone who has lost weight. It's such a struggle for me not to just snack. Like I said, I actually enjoy the act of eating and often will be so full but can still pack away a huge amoount of calories just through habit.

I need to see food as a fuel. That's the problem, I don't see food as a source of nutrition or health. I see it as something to LIVE for which is my problem. I am food obsessed!

This is going to be tricky isn't it??!

Mmmm baby steps and all that. I like the idea of breaking it down into manageable 7lbs chunks. That does seem a lot more do-able. 7lbs, half a stone.....nothing too challenging...I hope!!!

I also think I don't drink anywhere near enough water....or any liquid actually. I live on cups of sugary tea...not good. I am hoping to introduce water, fruit for snacks and really track what I consume because I never really am aware of the enormous amount I've eaten until it's too late!

[MrsGyllenhaal]

Ok so right here and now, I am going to set myself a target to lose 7lbs by DH's 30th birthday in 6 weeks time. That seems achievable to me....here goes!

[MrsGyllenhaal]

I will keep writing on here to keep myself motivated and try to keep track of things. It means I may be talking to myself but I don't mind that too much .

I just need to find something I can stick to... like calorie counting, or maybe just making better choices where food's concerned. I do like the sound of weight watchers but I don't want to go to meetings. I will have a look on the net and see what I discover.

Firts things first, up my water intake and walking. I can do this right??????

[Lizzylou]

Fabulous!
Upping your water intake helps massively.

Have a look on Myfitnesspal, honestly it is free and can become quite addictive, you log all your food and exercise and it totally focuses you.

You can do this.

[BsshBossh]

Of course you can do it without surgery MrsGyllenhaal :) I've lost over 5 stones in just over a year without resorting to any drastic measures. Take your time and explore all the weightloss threads here - there are so many ways to lose weight so take your time to work out what would suit you for the longterm. I spent alot of time reading all the diet threads on Mumsnet - lurking mainly - until I worked out what would suit me.

[MrsGyllenhaal]

Wow BssBossh...over 5 stone?!!! Well done. That is fantastic. You must feel great. Are you at your goal weight yet? How did you end up doing it in the end?

[BsshBossh]

Thanks. I thought I'd reached goal weight then realised I could actually get leaner so I'm aiming for another stone.

I lost the first chunk of weight doing good old fashioned calorie counting because I realised I needed to learn what normal, healthy portion sizes were. I used the excellent MyFitnessPal but ignored its recommended 1200 cals (too much like deprivation for me) and ate an average 1800/1900 cals a day (less during the week, more on the weekends).

After 11 months, I figured I had a handle on portion size and stopped logging. I started 5:2 fasting (motivated by the combination of fasting health benefits, weight loss and not needing to log) and lost the rest of the weight. I also started exercising (running and weights).

I'm now using 5:2, no snacking between meals (weekdays only) and exercise to lose (the last?) stone.

I highly recommend joining the appropriate support thread on Mumsnet when you decide how you want to lose weight. There are very motivating and supportive threads on here covering everything - MFP, 5:2, Paul McKenna, low carb, Weight Watchers etc.

You can do it! Good luck :)

[MrsGyllenhaal]

Thank you Bsshbossh! You really have done brilliantly. It's not easy is it?! Surprisingly easy putting weight ON though !

I think I like the sound of weight watchers but it's basically a low calorie diet so I may just go down the calorie counting route. I have been gobbling up around 3000 calories on a dailt basis so even cutting down to 1,800 calories would result in a loss I hope. You say it took you just over a year?! That's incredible, you must have been very determined. You have inspired me again! Thank you.

[BsshBossh]

If you want to go down the calorie counting route then plug all you details into the Scooby calculator below and then eat at the daily calories it suggests (eg 10, 15, 20% calorie reduction). I did this and didn't feel deprived at all cause I was still eating loads. In MyFitnessPal I just manually adjusted the settings to enter my own daily calorie target. Eating lots kept me motivated! And you can always undereat a little on the weekdays and overeat on the weekends - so long as your daily average is at your 15% (or whatever) reduction. I think each week I just aimed for a 3500 calorie deficit to lose 1lb a week (but sometimes ate more and sometimes less). Don't "eat back" any exercise calories if you're going by Scooby numbers:

scoobysworkshop.com/calorie-calculator/

I'm on a fab MyFitnessPal thread here - loads of supportive women including LizzyLou upthread :)

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/big_slim_whatever_weight_loss_club/1744186-Super-Hard-Chiefs-dont-mention-the-poo

[MrsGyllenhaal]

Thank you Bsshbossh.

Well, I have read up on WeightWatchers. I have purchased a weightwatchers calculater to work out the points in food.

Until the calculater and the books (food guides) arrive I am just going to be counting calories. I am limiting yself to 1600 a day which seems do-able. A lot of sites recomended 1200 but that seems a little too low and restrictive to me. Like I say, I am prepared to wait to see results and don't want a crash diet that I can't stick to!

So far today I've eated 2 low fat yogurts, some mango, then for lunch a weightwatchers Lemon Chicken Risotto meal (I know, ready meal doesn't exactly scream healthy diet) but it was delicious and I was busy with DS2 this morning so didn't have much time to prepare anything from scratch.

So far had 500 calories. Going to get weighed every Monday and report back here just to log it for my own reasons and to track my progress.

Hoping it'll keep me motivated!

[MrsGyllenhaal]

Oh I also measured my self this morning. My thighs are disgusting 30 inches [gross] Waist is 36 inches. Midway between shoulder and elbow round y arm is 15 inches. YUCK!

I am in shock that my thighs are 30 inches!! I knew they were big but that is just repulsive. People have waists thinner than each of my thighs! In fact my own waist is only 6" bigger! That's ridiculous!

Anyway, that's why I am doing this. Not pretty but I am going to make a change.

[eslteacher]

MrsG I definitely don't think you need to go lower than 1600. Well done on getting started.

I recommend stocking up on low cal snacks, including gum to chew for when the temptation to eat random crap comes along.

Get comfortable with feeling hungry sometimes. Its just a feeling, remember it won't kill you or harm you!

Good luck going forward, as long as you make a few changes in the right direction and keep them up the weight will come off!

[BsshBossh]

Well done for starting MrsG and agree, don't go lower than 1600. You might even be able to get away with more. You don't want your body to get used to low calorie eating because when you can't keep that up and want to increase your eating a bit you might put on weight.

Good luck! There's a Weight Watchers section here somewhere - you should join one of their support threads. I bet you're not the only new WW starter.

[Lizzylou]

Well done MrsG, you sound really focused and like you are in for the long haul. Very sensible sticking at 1600 cals.
Bssh is right, joining a thread for support really helps. Other people (like Bssh!) can be really inspirational and motivating. Also great source of hints and tips.
Really well done, those measurements are only going down

[MrsGyllenhaal]

Thanks to you all.

Well I managed to stick to 1600 cals fairly easily yesterday. I have made DH hide the bathroom scales because I can feel the temptation to weigh myself after every wee creeping in I know if I see the number rise by a quarter of a pound, I'll feel crushed! So I've told him to only let me have them every Monday!!!

My friend and I went out for a power walk on Tuesday night for 2 hours, we didn't mean for it to be that long actually but we got chatting and it was actually really nice. We're meeting up again tonight for another walk. I know it's not exactly a high energy work out but it's a step in the right direction.

Today I have been on a walk with DS2 in the pushchair for an hour. We had a nice chat and it's gorgeous weather.

I am so looking forward to next summer when hopefully I'll be fitter, not having to drag my fat arse around with me!