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Anyone want to join a thread about Eating Less.

287 replies

bumblingbovine · 17/05/2011 13:35

I read this book by Gillian Riley a while ago and it made so much sense. She has a website here
www.eatingless.com

I may even go to a seminar but I think the book has most of whast you need in it. There is a chapter free on the website to get an idea of the tone


She talks about stopping overeating and says that focussing on weight is completely counterproductive. I really would like to try this but thought it would be useful to have some support.

I have been thinking about this for a while but issues with my ds have got in the way. The other thread on fat/overeating has reminded me

I will need to dig the book out agin but the key thing she talks about is setting some realistic limits on the what, the amount and when you will eat and then sticking to them.

The idea is to "stop overeating" not to "lose weight". In fact you can stop overeating much more easily than you can lose weight and it happens quicker.

So my food plan would be to

Eat 3 balanced meals a day (one portion only - no seconds)every day. This would be
Breakfast between 7am and 9am
Lunch between 12pm and 2pm
Dinner between 6pm and 8pm

To have a maximum of 1 snack a day which should be of a reasonable size and reasonably healthy

Dessert if eaten should be fruit or yoghurt during the week but can be something less healthy at the weekend for dessert if I want it

Success would be sticking to the food plan each day. Weight would not come into it.
everybody's foodplan would be different to suit them

We could check in every few days (or daily) with how we have done or if we are having trouble with cravings and wanting to eat more.

Does anyone want to try this?

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SoloIsAHotCougar · 17/05/2011 14:38

Just join the Paul McKenna group or get his book. It is fabulous and so easy to follow and lose weight.

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bumblingbovine · 17/05/2011 14:49

I tried Paul Mckenna some of his ideas are good but whatever he says he is still talking about being thin and uses the thought of that as motivation. I am not talking about that I am talking about eating less as an aim in itself.

I know from experience that when I focus on losing weight or on keeping my weight the same (when I have lost the weight) I end up going wrong.

My aim would be to feel in control of my eating and if I am achieveing that I would be suceeding. The problem for me with using weight loss as a measure of success is that it is an uneven process and I can too easily feel like I am failing (e,g on the weeks I don't lose weight or on the days I am feeling fatter than usual for no particular reason)

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tunise · 17/05/2011 14:59

I've just come from that 'orrible fat thread (thank you for the link)
It all sounds really good,i'll have a look at amazon for the book. I started my healthy eating plan last week with that kind of general structure, my biggest downfall is anything sweet which i cannot stop myself from eating so i have decided (much to the childrens disgust) that there simply isn't any biscuits,cakes, choc or fizzy in the house but we will have some 'treats' on a Saturday if people still want them.

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bumblingbovine · 17/05/2011 15:08

Hi tunise

I am glad someone is interested. I am pretty big so it is hard to let go of the caring about my weight but I am trying.

So far I have managed to eat my lunch 10 mins late (2.10pm) but I think I can live with that. I do have a tendency to put off eating until I get too hungry then over eat and to eat at weird times of the day so that I have no clear idea of whether it is reasonable to eat someting at a given time or not.

Lunch was a chicken salad and salsa wrap and an apple so fine in terms of content I hope

I am exactly the same with sweet stuff. Gillian's book does talk about cravings and the desire to overeat in her book but tbh I have forgotten a lot of it. I need to re-read.

I am planning to eat pasta with ricotta and tomato sauce and green beans for dinner. with yoghurt and fruit (probably grapes for dinner)

My worst time is after dinner and when ds is in bed. The desire to eat is quite strong then and I in fact do most of my "crap/junk eating then"

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SoloIsAHotCougar · 17/05/2011 15:12

But our thread is a really good source of encouragement. We eat what we want to eat whenever we are hungry. We've learned to recognise real hunger and we've learned to recognise the feeling of fullness and therefore when to stop eating. I've lost 22lbs and there are some of us that have lost over two stones since mid to late February.
It really works, but I'll say no more other than to say that you will be made very welcome over there if you'd like to drop in and join us.

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tunise · 17/05/2011 16:06

Hi Bumbling,well i have a huge amount of weight i'd like to shift or to look at it another way a lot of over eating i'd like to undo.
I'm currently on mat leave and i'm unlucky enough to work in a job where all the female staff are very slender and even before this baby i was the only larger one there. I cannot go back even bigger than before Blush
I've also started drinking much more water than i did before and reducing the amount of coffee i drink as i cant drink coffee without sugar.
What about exercise- does that play a role in the eat less plan? I'm having a go at the 30 day shred which everyone raves about and trying to fitin some long walks with the pushchair.
Foodwise today have had porridge and a satsuma for breakfast, carrot sticks and houmous, a egg and maya sarnie on brown bread and some strawberries for lunch. Dinner is going to be pasta (snap!) with a tomato and veg sauce and maybe a yoghurt for pudding and i've got a nice ripe pineapple for snacking this evening.

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bumblingbovine · 17/05/2011 16:38

hi tunise

I think exercise is very important and definitely encouraged Grin
but I believe it is more about about changing the way you think about food.

I think the core of this is that instead of avoiding the desire to eat, that you have to sort of face it down while always reminding yourself that you can choose to eat if you want to.

So for instance I like risotto and often find myself feeling deprived if I can;t have a shedload of the stuff. To deal with this I tend to do one of two things
1 Tell myself I musn't have too much (this generally leads to me eating too much anyway as I have a strong rebelious streak!)
2 Trying to avoid the feeling of wanting to eat more by avoiding eating risotto or maybe distracting myself to avoid the desire to eat more. This usually leads to me eating it later instead or the next day
3 Cooking less risotto - This usually leads to me eating something else instead as a "consolation prize"


GR suggests another way:
Telling myself that I can eat as much risotto as I want to that is a choice that I can make. I am allowed to eat the 2nd or 3rd or even 4th plate. However I also need to remind myself about the consequences of eating that second (or third or fourth) plate and I need to accept those consequences.

In the consequences part she says we need to avoid the "gaining weight reason" as this has so much baggage for us so for me it would be that I would feel bloated and guilty about eating it and would feel bad immediately afterwards. I can avoid that feeling by actively choosing to eat less of it.

Once I have acted on the choice to eat less and have finished my food I may well feel the desire to eat more. She says that this is not something we should avoid as the practice of overcoming this desire is where we build our skill in dealing with the desire.

It was a bit of a revelation to me to relalise that most people who are not overweight have the desire to overeat but they are just more practised than me in dealing with that desire and not acting on it.

Also she says that she doesn't think we can elimiate all adictive eating, just reduce it so if we do eat too much one meal we just start again at the next meal.

She does suggest using a couple of things to help.

One is timing . Once you have eaten, decide on a time no lass than an hour or more than four hours away when you will eat again and don't eat before then.

second is planning
Just before eating a meal, plan how much and what you will eat. What it will look like on the plate etc, how much it will be be very clear about what you will eat. At this point remind yourself that you actively choosing this, keep reminding yourself that you can eat as much as you want but once you have decided what and how much you will eat then eat what you have planned and no more.

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HowToLookGoodGlaikit · 17/05/2011 16:46

lol SOlo, think you are just being ignored now :) I agree though, the Paul McKenna method is brilliant and requires no willpower.

Planning on exactly how much you are going to eat, and then eating past your satisfaction level is still over eating. The only way to stop overeating is to only eat when hungry and stop when satisfied. Anything outside this is overeating. If you really dont like Paul Mckenna, try The Overfed head. Exactly same principles, just without PMcK :)

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HowToLookGoodGlaikit · 17/05/2011 17:47

Realised that I sounded a bit arsey in my last post Blush sorry! I really do recommend that book though, there is a free ebook copy online that you can read :)

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bumblingbovine · 17/05/2011 18:54

Look I am not ignoring anyone. As I said I have tried Paul Mckenna and it just doesn't work for me. One of my major problem with it is only eating when hungry. This just meant I was constantly eating at times that were not meal times which just meant I was out of sync with mealtimes at home. I am not sure how you can realistically run a family if everyone eats when they are hungry if that doesn't co-incide with meal times.

I am not having a go at all but I explained why I wanted to try something different and didn't want to get into a discussion as to which way was better. My aim on this thread is to see if anyone is interested in trying it this way.

Also I could argue that you are not listening to me. I do not want to focus on weight and since the vast majority of people on the Mckenna thread are focussing on that I felt it wasn't the thread for me

I have done the weight loss thing so many times with many different methods and I am now 47 years old and weigh more than I ever have. I am trying something different.

As I said I think the Paul Mckenna method is great and I am genuinely glad it is working for you.

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bumblingbovine · 17/05/2011 18:56

Also the thing about planning what you eat is for the early days to help get some order in your eating. The idea is to get back in control not to lose weight.

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HowToLookGoodGlaikit · 17/05/2011 18:56

I was just pointing out that you are still overeating if you are eating outside your hunger, as thsi is what you said you wanted to work on? I must have been mistaken, sorry. Hope your new diet works for you :)

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SoloIsAHotCougar · 17/05/2011 23:57

Ditto HowToLookGood. Good luck :)

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MerylStrop · 18/05/2011 00:02

This is what I need to do

I comfort eat and I eat when I am bored. I need to stop.

I need to improve my breakfasts and lay off the suppers.

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bumblingbovine · 18/05/2011 10:48

Hi Merylstop

I'm glad you are intested. Did you look at the website? I think you need to get the book to properly understand the philosopy but there are some magazine articles on the website - good ones are here www.eatingless.com/downloads/eatingless-the-telegraph.pdf

and here
www.wiget.com/
And also a sample chapter here www.eatingless.com/downloads/eatingless-free-sample.pdf

Also she has a vidoe on the website you can watch

I had a great day yesterday. Evenings are a massive trigger point for me but I kept telling myself I could eat what I wanted as long as I understood that the consequenses of eating more than I needed were many including

  • feeling bloated and lethergic that evening
  • Waking up the next morning and remembering what I ate and feeling depressed, guilty. hopeless

    Gaining weight doesn't count as a consequence as I am already overweight and worrying about that does not stop me eating so it doesn't work for me.

    A major consequence of overeating for me is also that one for me is that I am expending a lot of energy on thinking about what I have eaten, what I shouldn't have eaten, trying not to eat etc. That is energy that I am not spending on other things that are really inportant. At the moment I am having major issues with my son and he needs his mother present and dealing with him, not running away into food.

    In the end I ate my dinner as planned and some fruit as a snack before bed


    Today for breakfast I ate
    a slice of toast with some peanut butter on and half a banana
    A small glass of a homemade smoothie

    Lunch is a box of leftovers (quite a bit smaller than I would usually bring in) and an apple which means my planning is done as I will eat what is in the box and the apple

    I will see how today goes but it is liberating not having that constant voice in my head saying "you must, you shouldn't, you need to etc)
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erebus · 18/05/2011 13:07

Thanks for the links, bovine

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IvaNighSpare · 18/05/2011 18:33

just started reading her book, count me in :)

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IvaNighSpare · 18/05/2011 19:10

just started reading her book, count me in :)

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IvaNighSpare · 18/05/2011 19:10

oops, sorry, double post!

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bumblingbovine · 18/05/2011 19:44

Hi to anyone around still interested in this. I can't stay on here long at the moment as I have some urgent work that needs doing. I have just eaten dinner though Jacket pot, with tuna mayo, broccoli and carrots. I am not sure if it was a bit too much but overall I feel ok.

Am definitely craving more food though. What the book says about eating itself being a trigger for craving more is so true. Once I start eating, no matter what it is I am eating I find it really hard to stop. When I finish a meal I am always looking for what else there is to eat even if I am quite full.
Not satisfing that desire is not something I am that used to. Even when on I diet I'd probably be munching on celery and carrot sticks all evening.

Anyway the leftover easter eggs are looking very good at the moment. I keep telling myself I can eat them if I want as long as I accept how that wil make me feel and so far it is working. I think the "rebelling" thing is a big part of my eating problem Grin as even the thought of "you shouldn't, can't" makes me eat loads.

I have set a time of 9pm before I can eat again. I'll decide then if I want my fruit/yoghurt and if so work out how much of that I will eat.

How is everyone else doing?

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ppeatfruit · 19/05/2011 11:21

I'm on the P.M. thread, I don't do EXACTLY what he says (i eat for my blood type) so healthily.I also agree that the title is not helpful BUT if you did it you MUST have found the 'chew 20 times' idea fab.

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ppeatfruit · 19/05/2011 11:43

IMO P.M. is so positive and the work that is done on self image actually changes people!! With the chew 20 times principle at the heart of it (that really helps) also we all eat with our families!!

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IvaNighSpare · 19/05/2011 16:06

I'm still here, and loving reading the book, so far it is making so much sense.
I did Slimming World a couple of years ago, lost five and a half stone, but have piled it all back on again.
I know I have an addictive nature and Slimming World became another addiction. I was incredibly focused, my target was to be declared Slimmer of the Year, and I became incredibly competitive, driven by the urge to be the best.
I loved the adulation and admiration for achieving slimmer of the week, slimmer of the month, and, yes, I got my slimmer of the year, too.
But then, I ran out of steam, lost my 'focus', I'd got the approval I so desperately sought but couldn't go any further. And the buzz of it all soon faded away.
Reading the book I'm realising that my views were skewed and relied entirely on building my self-esteem on others' approval of my successes. All that mattered to me was the number on the scales, and my entire week could be lifted or destroyed depending on the result. That is no way to live, so I rebelled against it. Too much, and gave myself 'justification' to eat.
I need to release myself from this self-destructive way of thinking, and I hope this book will help direct me along the right path.

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winedog · 19/05/2011 16:57

Hello, count me in. I think Gillian Riley's book is great. It really gets down to the nitty gritty of how your brain works when you are addicted to eating. My problem is that I can identify when my eating is addictive but still eat anyway! I would love some support as I really need to face this. I know I need to face this and it will eventually become easier. The issue of self esteem is also very true-true self esteem comes from within and being proud of yourself, not relying on the approval of others. I waste so much time worrying about what i should/shouldn't be eating, loathing myself for overeating and then do it all over again. True sign of an addict-repeating the same things over and over when it does you damage.Blush

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bumblingbovine · 19/05/2011 20:02

Hi Both

I really identify with what you are both saying, the "competitive dieting"
and also the knowing food is my drug of choice but not knowing how to stop.

I find mornings very difficult because I have to get dressed and looking at myself in the mirror always starts the voice in my head "you are so fat, you look disgusting, you need to diet, you have to stop eating, I am going to be good today etc.., It's no good I'll never do it, I've been trying for 30 years etc.." No wonder I was feeling bad about myself!!

I have started to say the following to myself all morning when I get dressed

"I can eat whatever I want to, I can eat whatever I want to etc". I also occasionally add "as long as I accept how it will make me feel afterwards if I overeat". It is almost like a mantra and I keep saying it in my heat while I dress so that I can't start thinking all the other negative thoughts. I have to say I already feel lighter and more positive.

It seems to be working as I am actively making the choice to eat less at breakfast and lunchtime without any fear or resentment which there always was in spades when I was "trying to lose weight" and I am feeling better about myself.

I am still struggling a bit with the size of my evening meal but I have managed not to graze/binge in the evenings so far which is fantastic for me. So my evening trigger times are difficult but I am getting there.

My mental state is quite good actually if a bit fragile but I keep finding myself thinking about how thin I will be in a year which I always do at the beginning of a new "diet". The problem with that is that I am usually so euphoric that I have my eating under control that I start projectiong into the future as to how thin I will be. Then I see myself in the mirror and the contrast between what I see and what I have been fantasising about and the reality hits so I feel terrible and eat again. So the euphoria and then the crash is just like the dieting and the bingeing. I seem to live in the extremes.

This isn't happening at the moment. I do feel content and clear headed and have more energy which is a result of not wasting energy and time thinking about what to eat, what not to eat etc.

I am going to try and check in every day so that I can record how it is going for me

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