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Catholic blessing

(17 Posts)
nrpmum Thu 04-Jul-19 08:20:54

I don't do religion, and the last church wedding I went to was at least 8 years ago.

Bil married two years ago in HK and brought his wife over last year. They are both Catholic. Both had their previous marriages annulled through the church.

Anyway they have literally just dropped on us that they are getting their marriage blessed mid September in the local Catholic church. Bil has said to mil that the ladies have to wear floor length dresses and cover the shoulders.

I have a below knee dress that covers the shoulders, but no floor length dress. I also have £0 budget for a new dress because I am travelling for my friends wedding this month which has depleted funds.

Do I have to wear a floor length dress or can I get away with my below knee one?

timeforakinderworld Thu 04-Jul-19 08:23:09

You have to take this up with him as it has nothing to do with it being a Catholic blessing. We had a Catholic blessing and you can wear what you want!

banivani Thu 04-Jul-19 08:28:41

Very generally speaking it is normal to have covered shoulders in a church, i.e. no strappy tops etc. But not even that is hard and fast as a rule tbh. Here in Sweden I doubt anyone would care, but I’m told that some churches ask tourists to drape a scarf over their shoulders when visiting, for example. Floor length dresses - never heard of this. Below the knee is more than I’d usually see!

CherryPavlova Thu 04-Jul-19 08:37:29

No, definitely not a requirement of Catholicism. We were at Mass in shorts last week - as were many others.
In nonUK countries there is a tradition of being more covered but rarely compulsory. I’ve done Mass in HK and worn a normal summer dress without any ‘looks’. Italy was most conservative church I’ve been too but even then no rules. Whilst Ives heard about covered shoulders business, it’s often people’s idea of expectations rather than what most Catholics think.

nrpmum Thu 04-Jul-19 08:39:24

I definitely have the dress for my shoulders being covered, and it is the one that is below knee and wedding appropriate. I'll wear that.

@timeforakinderworld I very rarely see him due to him working opposite shifts to my husband and I. My husband works with him, so will talk to him.

nrpmum Thu 04-Jul-19 08:40:47

Thank you everyone. Appreciate the feedback. Will get husband to talk to him about it when he next works with him.

bellinisurge Thu 04-Jul-19 09:19:30

I'm a Catholic and was married in a Catholic Church. The floor length dresses think is UTTER BULLSHIT..

nrpmum Thu 04-Jul-19 09:43:07

Thank you @bellinisurge I wanted to be respectful without spending money I don't have. I'll go with my original dress and my husband can tell his brother that it'll have to do.

Appreciate everyone's comments. Thank you all for your help.

bellinisurge Thu 04-Jul-19 09:47:44

My late mum would probably have wanted you to cover your shoulders with a cardigan but I don't know any Catholics who would say anything other than "put your best outfit on and turn up with a smile". And I know some serious Catholics. My own wedding was a "no hats unless you want to wear one" affair. As are most weddings I have been to. I'm in my fifties, btw.

nrpmum Thu 04-Jul-19 13:10:29

We're mid forties, so not far behind. Thank you @bellinisurge

BackforGood Fri 05-Jul-19 00:26:35

Covering shoulders is polite, and was 'expected' 30 years ago (though I've been to wedding in a Catholic Church where bride had a strapless dress).
The floor length isn't a Catholic Church requirement - sounds like some kind of 'dress code' they are suggesting themselves.
What you describe is fine, from the Church's pov (unless you are going to drip feed it is a particularly orthodox or 'very, very, 'high' Catholic Church - that said you don't have to wear floor length dresses to the Vatican.

nrpmum Fri 05-Jul-19 19:56:03

No @BackforGood it's not orthodox or a high Catholic church. Just your normal one as far as I'm aware

mrswarthog Fri 05-Jul-19 20:04:33

Nope, cradle Catholic here, go to mass every week, you don't need full length dresses. I've been to 4 requiem masses in the last month and still worn knee length dresses.

isittheholidaysyet Fri 05-Jul-19 20:12:08

Yep I agree with he above. We in England are not too bothered what you wear in a Catholic church.
Though having the swim wear areas covered would be preferable. We'd rather not see your underwear.

In Europe including the Vatican they expect shoulders covered and below the knee skirts, shorts, trousers (male and female).

However different families and cultures have different expectations, so you might want to ask him.
But certainly that's not coming from the English Catholic church.

nrpmum Fri 05-Jul-19 20:16:37

However different families and cultures have different expectations, so you might want to ask him

No one other than he or his wife are Catholic. When they got married his wife wore a ballet length dress (although appreciate it was a civil ceremony). I have seen ladies coming out of the church wearing below knee, and my dress covers my shoulders and is below knee.

Trust me I'm way too old for dresses showing my underwear 😂

TheSandgroper Sat 13-Jul-19 14:38:45

I don’t recommend a pussy pelmet (I promise you that’s a bad look in a church) but what you have sounds perfectly respectable and exactly what I have worn on a number of occasions as the go-to for baptism, First Communion and Confirmation. Dh needn’t discuss it. Just turn up and know you are fine.

nrpmum Sat 13-Jul-19 14:53:49

😂 I have never heard that expression before, but know exactly what you mean by that comment 😂😂😂😂

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