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Wearing white to someone else's wedding πŸ‘ŽπŸ‘ŽπŸ‘Ž

(53 Posts)
MissMoodyMoo Wed 03-Jul-19 21:01:59


yes I'm talking about myself!! I'm going to own my ridiculous new found bridezillaness.

Ok so, how can I politely tell people not to wear white to my wedding? I'm aware it sounds ludicrous to some people that a bride should dictate what their guest wear but I find it soooo passive aggressive to wear white to someone's wedding! My dad's girlfriend wore a lovely πŸ™„ white dress to my sister's wedding and I low key Spent the full day and night sending my nieces and nephews over to her with sticky dirty chocolatey hands (yes i know I'm ridiculous) she even posed with my sister's bouquet which nearly tipped me over the edge πŸ˜­πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ€¦πŸΌβ€β™€οΈ I love my dad's girlfriend but I just think it's awful to wear white to another persons wedding! There is so any other colours to choose from!
Anyway! I 100% know I won't be able to hold my tongue or hide my facial expressions if someone turns up wearing white!! (Again I know I'm being ridiculous but I can't help it)

I'm thinking of dropping subtle hints into conversations and the odd fb meme!!

Ahhh why do planning weddings make people crazy??

SheWoreBlueVelvet Wed 03-Jul-19 23:25:09

The only slightly subtle way to do it is to have a strictly formal dress code. There is no way anyone can wear white formally to a wedding without looking like a bride.
I don’t think florals or polka dots and white are too bad myself though but some brides dislike them

Or send a message round, sandwiching the Bridexilla request between to more sane information.
Ie Hello the dress code is β€œ blah, blah, blah” m you would appreciate guests not wearing white, the dance floor isn’t suitable for stilettos.

hotcrossbun4321 Thu 04-Jul-19 20:31:46

I agree, it's a tricky one. In an ideal world people would have a bit of sense and consideration hmm

I went to a wedding where the bride wore a short tea-length style dress, and another guest turned up in a white, beaded, lacy dress! I just couldn't fathom the level of rudeness it took to do that! Subtle hints might be the way to go.

At mine (in 8 days!!!) I'm planning a basket of blankets for evening in case it's chilly - you could do similar and brief your bridesmaids to politely offer people a shawl if needed grin

sneakypinky Thu 04-Jul-19 20:36:44

I'm getting married next year and I will knock a glass of red on any twat that wears white.

You don't do it. Anyone who does is an attention seeking eejit who can't stand not having the limelight.

Good shout on sending chocolatey kids over!

MiniMaxi Thu 04-Jul-19 20:38:14

I have a question for you (genuine). Is this "pure white / off white" only or would you be annoyed if people wore a dress with any white elements (eg white / colour stripes)?

noenergy Thu 04-Jul-19 20:49:28

I read an article in the Sun yesterday where the brides SIL wore a long white gown.

hotcrossbun4321 Thu 04-Jul-19 20:59:46

I've worn a white dress before but with a very busy black, silver and lilac floral pattern, with a different colour shrug on all day, so very much not a white dress.

I think in this day and age of tea length dresses and brides not going full meringue as much I'd be tempted to avoid even off white/pale pink just in case - it can come up different in photos and you might get people looking back at pics wondering who the arsehole in the cream dress is

sneakypinky Thu 04-Jul-19 21:05:26

I think white striped or floral is fine. It's the block white/ivory lace and maxi dresses that can fuck off.

DappledThings Thu 04-Jul-19 21:14:00

I've been to about 20 weddings and never seen anyone wear white. Its unlilely to be an issue.

Ok, so there was one wedding where the bride's sister wore her own wedding dress slightly altered. But she was bonkers and just made a fool out of herself.

user2085372673 Thu 04-Jul-19 21:17:13

Someone wore white to our wedding and then got married in the dress a year later.

MissMoodyMoo Thu 04-Jul-19 21:30:54

I'm totally prepared to rugby tackle white wearing guests out of our venue πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

MissMoodyMoo Thu 04-Jul-19 21:32:40

Or I'll nip to the charity shop buy a bunch of Β£1 dresses in various sizes and if someone has the audacity to show up in white or something totally unacceptable they will have the option of leaving or wearing a charry dress! AND I'll make the point of not washing them πŸ˜‚πŸ™„

blaaake Thu 04-Jul-19 21:32:38

You could put a funny note at the end of the invitations saying 'ps if anybody turns up in white you'll be going home without teeth'

Obvs a bit more elegant than that though grin

MissMoodyMoo Thu 04-Jul-19 21:35:41

Since I'm on a roll with my ranting πŸ˜‚πŸ™„πŸ€¦πŸΌβ€β™€οΈ
What is with the girls that ask what colour the bridesmaid dresses are then deliberately show up in the exact same colour??? I've known this to happen a few times and it honestly just blows my mind how attention seeking can be

MumofTinies Thu 04-Jul-19 21:36:51

I wouldn't put anything in the invite, anyone who would be silly enough to wear white will just look a tit!

I'm guessing you have a wedding photographer, maybe have a word with them to make sure any idiot who does wear white is placed in a less prominent position in group shots.

timeforakinderworld Thu 04-Jul-19 21:37:03

A guest turned up in a LONG white dress to my wedding and asked someone to take pics of her and boyfriend outside the church- not sure what was going on there but she made herself look a bit ridiculous. She also broke up with said boyfriend shortly afterwards.

ASilhouetteAndNothingMore Thu 04-Jul-19 21:41:20

I had no bridesmaids at my wedding. My work colleague asked if she could bring her daughter as her plus one, I was fine with that. Until the daughter turned up in a full bridesmaid type outfit angry

MissMoodyMoo Thu 04-Jul-19 22:02:21


ilovepixie Thu 04-Jul-19 22:10:03

I have a friend who got married and her own mother wore white!

joanneandthegiantpeach Thu 04-Jul-19 22:16:21

I didn't say anything to my guests beforehand (I personally think it might look a bit bridezilla!) I didn't even notice what anyone wore as I was having too much fun but looking back at my photos, one guest wore a white/champagne plain maxi & they just look a bit silly. Anyone who's seen the photos comments on it looking ridiculous rather than her "stealing the limelight". Even if you decide not to say anything, anyone who does it, just looks silly anyway & wont steal your spotlight.

Someone else asked what colour the bridesmaids were wearing & knew they were having flowers in their hair. Said person wore the bridesmaids' colour and flowers in her hair.

Knitclubchatter Fri 05-Jul-19 04:30:28

Wear pink or yellow tinted glasses. You won’t notice the white wearers.

Fantababy Fri 05-Jul-19 04:36:04

Who the hell cares? Presumably they're your guests so they'll know that you're the bride?! If someone chooses to wear white it's probably because it's their favourite outfit to look nice for your wedding - not because they want to upstage you. And if they do do it to upstage you they're a twat, and will look like one.

BreakfastAtSquiffanys Fri 05-Jul-19 05:13:31

Ask your dad to buy his girlfriend a non white dress for your wedding, just in case

IAmAlwaysLikeThis Fri 05-Jul-19 05:20:42

You can't say anything without looking mental.

Trust me, this will seem like nothing after a year of marriage. I barely remember a thing about my wedding, let alone what anyone was wearing, so I wouldn't stress.

Just focus on the marriage, that's the important thing, not what some people have chosen to wear.

SushiForAmateurs Fri 05-Jul-19 05:26:25

I agree with Fantababy - why care?

The only person you'd be giving an aneurism to, by seething your head off, will be you.

Likewise, at your sister's wedding - the only person having a ruined day (by the sounds of it!) was you?! Getting kids to ruin over with chocolate hands? Did you really not have anything more fun to be doing? I know, I know, you're being light-hearted, but I bet you actually were doing this - when you could've been knocking back πŸ₯‚ having a dance and enjoying the craic. confused

You're the bride. Everyone knows you're the bride. No-one can upstage the bride - least of all a random guest most people don't even know.

People will either be judging the guest as clueless, or (more likely), they won't notice or give a tiny shite.

Seriously. It's a total waste of blood pressure.

And if you're going to be so het up on the day as to be all passive aggressive and obvious, then just own it, and say something on the invitations (thereby letting everyone know just how insecure you actually are).

Alternatively - get over it, and have a lovely day.

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