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Are small/intimate weddings shit?

(43 Posts)
HopefullyNameChanged Sun 28-Apr-19 20:09:54

Partner and I have been together 15 years, we have one daughter aged two. We've decided to get married but neither of us is into the idea of a big doo.

When we got down to who we'd actually genuinely want there, it is a grand total of 12 people. Immediate family and best friends only.

We just want a simple ceremony (not in a church) and then a nice meal. Job done.

Is that quite sad and pathetic for a wedding??

OP’s posts: |
LoubyLou1234 Sun 28-Apr-19 20:10:47

This is the kind of wedding I would like tbh but with a few more people....

Honeyroar Sun 28-Apr-19 20:11:11

No, not at all. Especially if it's what you both want.

PerspicaciaTick Sun 28-Apr-19 20:11:24

No. Small weddings are some of the loveliest and most meaningful.

Runkle Sun 28-Apr-19 20:13:19

Why would it be sad an pathetic if that's what you both want? IMO people lose sight of what it's about. Sounds perfect to me.

CookieSwirlC Sun 28-Apr-19 20:13:29

No it will be wonderful if that’s what you want!

My sister got married with just both sets of parents there and for my wedding we had a morning ceremony, exclusive use of a hotel restaurant for a lunch, all done and dusted by half 5 and there were 25 of us in total including 3 young nieces and Dh and I. No evening do, we went out for steak with another couple of friends who were staying over with us.

taraplus Sun 28-Apr-19 20:16:35

I work as a registrar and the smaller weddings are some of the best. You'll have a fabulous day. Sharing it with the people who mean the most to you both.

FraggleRocking Sun 28-Apr-19 20:16:53

Absolutely not! Weddings can get out of hand. Have who you truly want there, and it will be very special.

DramaAlpaca Sun 28-Apr-19 20:17:42

I think that sounds perfect.

Greengreengrass19 Sun 28-Apr-19 20:18:02

We are planning the same - us and our two kids plus seven other guests.

haverhill Sun 28-Apr-19 20:18:48

We had something very similar with 28 people there. It was really lovely and we’re still married 14 years later..

Redshoeblueshoe Sun 28-Apr-19 20:18:52

Sounds lovely.

ParkingIInPlainSight Sun 28-Apr-19 20:22:13

My brother did this. It was lovely.

englishdictionary Sun 28-Apr-19 20:22:53

If your small intimate wedding is shit you are marrying the wrong person.

The wedding is irrelevant if you are marrying the right one.

Other people's opinion on your choice doesn't matter.

Tonightstheteriyakichicken Sun 28-Apr-19 20:24:05

What works for you both won't be pathetic flowers

CostanzaG Sun 28-Apr-19 20:24:32

It's my wedding anniversary today. We had a very small wedding....just 6 of us there in total and it was absolutely perfect. We wouldn't change a thing

zippyswife Sun 28-Apr-19 20:25:38

Best friend had something very similar- only 10 of us. Best wedding I’ve ever been too. Really intimate. Great fun. Personal. Loved it. Have a great day.

OnGoldenPond Sun 28-Apr-19 20:26:19

The best wedding I've ever been to involved just the bride and groom, the registrar and me and DH as witnesses.

The couple were our oldest friends and were very strapped for cash so could only afford the smallest room at the registry office which only had room for the two witnesses. It was lovely and informal, with lots of laughter and jokes.

Family and other friends were waiting outside the building to throw confetti. Then it was back to the groom's daughters small house for informal party with about 20 close family and friends. A lovely celebration, lots of happiness and none of the awkwardness and stress of large formal events.

Six months later their DD arrived so cue more celebrations smile

Fakeflowersandlemonade Sun 28-Apr-19 20:27:55

This is how we are planning to get married but with probably even fewer guests. Nothing fancy just a quick ceremony and a meal x

stucknoue Sun 28-Apr-19 20:28:48

It's whatever you want it to be. Ultimately being married is what you want not a wedding

bert3400 Sun 28-Apr-19 20:28:50

Not sure what your budget would be but we got married here. It sleeps 22 , cost about £8k for the week but was amazing .

We had been together for 15 years and just wanted an amazing party with family & friends. It was a beautiful week of celebration.

RLABC Sun 28-Apr-19 20:30:51

My wedding was just myself, husband and my parents and registrar at the official bit and just us four for a meal afterwards. They did come away with us for the night though grin It would only have been better if my son could have come but, other than that, it was perfect smile

MissParple Sun 28-Apr-19 20:31:40

Nothing sad and pathetic about having the wedding you want, be that a small intimate wedding or a massive affair. You'll be marrying the person you love and then having a gorgeous lunch with your favourite people in the world. Not a shabby way to spend a day!

ShinyRuby Sun 28-Apr-19 20:32:25

Not sad & pathetic at all, in fact the opposite. It sounds lovely & how special. Good luck!

NotOnTheBench Sun 28-Apr-19 20:33:49

It's your wedding, do it your way. I overlook our registry office + we all love the small weddings. In a lot of ways it means you have only invited people you want to be there with you, not those you think you ought to invite.

Have a lovely day flowers

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