just got engaged...what next?

[GreenGoth89]

Got engaged last week, and I'm not sure what to do next! I've started looking at venues, and found very little (we're doing a as-much-DIY-as-humanly-possible wedding) that fits our criteria - vaguely West Midlands and surrounding areas, outdoor, not requiring us to use their suppliers, and somewhere that allows camping - essentially an empty field! I'm aware that as we'll be arranging everything there's likely to be a lot more planning that needs doing - I haven't costed up a marquee or catering equipment yet but we're already spoken to friends who have offered us their services (DJ, use of a PA, crafting stuff, helping doing prep of food etc). We've given ourselves a rough date of summer 2018, so plenty of time to get stuff done (and save money) but where do I start??

[Muskateersmummy]

I would take some time to discuss the sort of wedding you want to have. If you have no idea what, spend some time at wedding fayres and researching online. Then scout out some venues and work out your budget. I would get the venue booked but then not worry too much about the smaller stuff until nearer the time. If it's a summer wedding I would look at sending out save the dates to all those people who you really want to be there with you.

[ElspethFlashman]

First thing is: don't do anything for 6 months. Nothing spoils a new engagement quicker than bowling head first into the (rather dull) minutiae of wedding planning.

Decide that you don't start till say January. Agree that between the both of you. And spend the next 6 months wafting about, being very left handed and perfecting your tinkly laugh when people ask you about the wedding, stressing rather smugly that you're both just enjoying being all loved up at the moment and won't be even thinking about all that boring stuff till next year.

[RatOnnaStick]

Are you planning to get married outside? You can't just do it in a marquee. It needs to be in a permanent structure with a solid roof to be licenced.

[MyKingdomForBrie]

Book in the big stuff and say it's for a party not a wedding! Marquee and a toilet block as basics.

Do you not have any connections who have a field you could use? It sounds like you really don't need an actual 'venue' at all and in my experience, doing the wedding in a field thing is a lot more expensive than you'd imagine!!

[Sooverthis]

Go and try on wedding dresses you are under no pressure to buy you're are legitimately just looking.

[GreenGoth89]

Musketeer- we have an idea that we want a festival style wedding, ideally outdoors and we've got a couple of DJs and a band who are willing to play, plus having loads of games for the kids (and big kids too).

Rat- we're going to do the legal bit in a registry office and then have a interfaith blessing outdoors. Really annoyed about the difference between English and Scottish law on that one!

I'm going to go try dresses when I've lost a bit of weight - I've got 3 stone to lose, and it's not an easy task as I'm not very mobile due to a pain condition.

We don't know anyone who has a field, I did think about talking to the local NFU branch to see if any of their members might have a field we could use.

The venue I've been looking at (chase view) is £1200 for 3 days and £550 for toilet hire so that's already a fair amount without marquee/food/generator etc. I haven't found any indoor venues which aren't very prim and proper in our area.

[GreenGoth89]

Found another venue similar sort of costs, then another indoor venue but that's £3000 with catering which just seems nuts!!!

Does anyone have any alternative ideas? I feel like I'm tuning out of options!

[GreenGoth89]

How much is a fair amount to spend on catering? We've just been quoted 3k and I'm sure we could do better for less

[AmberGreyson]

Don't forget about wedding photographer. I can recommend Elena Widmer . She is a professional wedding photographer and a great person. U can discuss your ideas with her. PS she has a blog