No invitations received yet, but wedding quandary

(3 Posts)
Ihatecobwebs Tue 02-Feb-16 20:00:58

My niece is planning to get married this year. Only know this as she mentioned it in a letter to my DM, and DM told me. Date was given.

Since then, a couple of months, no further contact, mention or invite.

Background:
My DM is getting elderly, not frail, but not as nippy on her pins as she used to be, gets tired more quickly than she used to, and her hearing and eyesight are going a bit. I encouraged her to move closer to me a few years ago, so it's easier for me to keep an eye on her, take her to medical appointments, do the heavy shopping, do stuff round the house etc.

Now my DS has been given details for a youth group weekend, the same dates. I would need to go as an adult helper. I need to book and pay non-refundable fee this week.

So, do I book it, as we haven't received an invitation, and might not anyway, or
leave the weekend free in case I'm asked to be my mother's driver? The presumption would be that I would take her to wherever needed. Public transport would be several trains, then bus/taxi - at least 4 hours.

I don't have any contact details for DN, DM just has an address, and it seems a bit rude to ask if we're/she's going to get an invite.

DN's family live several hundred miles away. I think there will be a presumption that I will take her to the wedding, whether I am invited or not.

RandomMess Tue 02-Feb-16 20:05:04

If your DM is invited could she not make a holiday of it and you deliver a few days before and collect a few days after so you could still go as a helper for your DS weekend?

ThroughThickAndThin01 Tue 02-Feb-16 20:08:49

I think I'd make a quick inquiry to DN, say things are starting to come into your Dm/yours diary, and can you she confirm the date is still the same for the wedding so you can still keep it free.

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