Need advice on practicalities of having my 3 yr old at my wedding!

[dhaydon1]

Hi! My toddler is 2 and will be 3 when we get married in July next year. I'm really really worrying about how it's all going to work with her!
E.g how will i get ready (in peace? Without weetabix catapulting and tantrums and smeared makeup?)
Will she be ok going down the aisle or will she insist on me carrying her down because she's shy? I don't want to face a tantrum just as i enter the church, but don't want to leave her out :(
Can i expect granny to feed her lunch just as we are about to leave for the church and how will that work?!
She is really not happy with anyone but MUM at the moment and extremely tantrum my. She won't let her grandparents have her at all. However it would be so much easier if they could have her in the morning. I am hoping she will be better in a year but i just don't know! Help me... I'm freaking out over these details!!

[Glitteryfrog]

Could she walk down the aisle between you and your dad (if he's walking with you) or wait with daddy for you to walk in... If she ran up the aisle to meet you that would be cute.

Can you give her to the men (your husband, your dad any best men) because they'll be greeting people who she knows and it'll be more fun than watching you put on a dress and make up.

[SellFridges]

We got married when DD was almost three. We had her stay with GP's the evening before. At one point she was going to stay with DH but they offered and it was much easier. They brought her to the ceremony all dressed and ready to go. She wasn't going to come in the wedding car anyway as I didn't want her in the car without a car seat.

At the ceremony she walked down the aisle with one of my adult bridesmaids. She chose which one she wanted to walk with.

At the reception she was pretty clingy for a while until she realised she had the run of the place (she was the only child). We bought her some new toys and craft bits which we put in her seat. She had great fun and we didn't need to watch her too much as everyone there was keeping an eye out for her.

We took pyjamas with us and she changed into those later in the evening before PIL took her home.

So basically I'm saying delegate responsibility for the day!

[SellFridges]

I just noticed you said she's nervous right now with GP's. I'd build up time with them ahead of the day. Make it an adventure.

[LibrariesGaveUsP0wer]

You have a year to get her used to GP and a three year old is very different to a two year old.

Do you want her to walk down the aisle? There are lots of.other options.

[dhaydon1]

Thank you so much everyone. First ever post on here! I think i feel pressured to have her walk up the aisle as my family say how cute and wonderful it will be. I think you are right that i should wait and see what she is like as a 3yr old and definitely build up time with grandparents if possible.

Re giving her to her dad in the morning i wonder maybe if he could have her aafter breakfast while i get ready, and drop her back before we leave for church so she can go in the car with my mum who is the only other person so far that she is happy with?

I'm just wary that if she's been with daddy all morning, when i arrive at the church she might not want to leave me in order for me to walk up the aisle! !! I feel so bad saying this as if she is a burden, love her so much, i don't think it helps that she's going through such a difficult stage at the very time that I'm planning and visualising the wedding!!

What did you all do with your little ones while getting ready e.g make up artist, hairdresser etc?

Who took little one to the church?

Thanks again x

[dhaydon1]

Thank you, I'd better start building up her relationship with the grandparents hehe! I'd love them to do that overnight and theyd be happy to. If only little one would not throw an all out tantrum every time they come over or we go there :(!!!!! X

[LibrariesGaveUsP0wer]

I didn't have kids when I married but DD1 was a bridesmaid at 3. I would have her somewhere else whilst you get ready. If she can see you she is likely to want you, or want to join in.

Just remember also that the difference between 2 and 3 is as big as the difference between 1 and 2.

[dhaydon1]

Thank you very much for the reassurance :) x

[Helloall1]

Hi

Our 4 year old walked down the aisle first with our bridesmaid and sprinkled flower petals, they really enjoyed having a special job to do on the day.

They stayed with hubby night before and our Grandparents mainly looked after them through the day for designated bits. I was a little worried too but it went so well.

They weren't keen on the sit down meal, but we took colouring books etc and all was well.

Good luck x

[dhaydon1]

Thank you Hello all, out of curiosity did hubby dress her and take her to the church? And do her hair? My partner is worried about that bit lol. The sprinkling petals is a nice idea, she might not feel so overwhelmed with a job to do xx

[Helloall1]

Quite a few of us stayed at the venue the night before, so I made sure everyone had timings and little jobs to do.

Hubby brought little one to the venue in the morning, they chilled out, had bite of lunch then got dressed. Came to my room for pics then walked down the aisle. They were shy but really enjoyed it.

Our was slightly easier as had lots of family and friends already at the venue.

It was lovely seeing little one all dressed and ready. Timings are so important, make sure you know what's happening and when. Show your little one lots of pics, keep them involved so they feel part of it.

We took ours to all our venue visits, to ring shopping, meal taster etc. They were such a wonderful part of our day xx

[dhaydon1]

Thank you xx