I have no clue what I'm doing?

[PixieofCatan]

I know I'm missing things and it's not as simple as I think!

I have the ceremony venue I want to book, it'll cost me £145 for the ceremony including a registrar. That is all I know, I need to double check timings with DP tonight and book the registry office tomorrow. I vaguely know that there's something about registering the wedding before the date?

Regarding the day itself, we intend to just go to a restaurant and then for a few drinks, so that can be booked in the new year.

I need to buy a dress, a pair of rings and a suit for DP.

Now please tell me how woefully unprepared I am and what I need to do. Last time I was looking at the wedding prep lists I was just getting myself in a tizz because they have loads of things on them that don't apply. We're having a smallish ceremony and meal and that's it. Low key, close family and a couple of friends each only really!

[LineRunner]

When you ring the registry office tomorrow they will explain it all to you.

It really can be as simple as you describe. Have a lovely day. Just make sure you get some good photographs!

[PixieofCatan]

I just called and didn't think to ask about everything leading up to it They won't get annoyed if I ask them then?! I didn't want to keep her whilst asking questions about things that should be basic

& thanks :) Hopefully I will but the photographer I want is not doing weddings at the moment :( He's a family friend so I'm hoping to collar him at an event before Christmas and ask for a favour

[TreadSoftlyOnMyDreams]

You do know that white doves have to be booked AGES in advance

Sounds like you are going to have a lovely day.

I'd scout around the shops now so you have an idea of style of dress that you would like to wear. That way if you are lucky you can just buy it online in the Jan sales for 50% off The really nice part is that the wedding and often the clothes departments will be deserted this time of year so it will be lovely and quiet.

We did a save the date via email [as our wedding was overseas for many people so we wanted to give them a chance to get flight and hotel deals] and didn't bother with cards. Anyone not on email was contacted separately.

I've heard that there are lots of proposals over Christmas/NY. If you want to get married quickly and wanted bespoke rings you might want to get quotes now. Assuming a standard ring in a standard material, should take 5 mins.

[Rainbowshine]

With the registers office you go to an appointment prior to the wedding for them to check your ID and also details for the ceremony. They'll talk you through that.

I had a small wedding too and the only things I can think of are flowers (we just had a button hole for DH and a small bouquet for me) and whether you want a professional photographer or just family or friends to do this. Do make a list of who you want in each photo- we nearly forgot to take one of us as a couple on our own! Monsoon is good for dresses and as others have mentioned the sales are a good opportunity to get things cheaper.

[Merrow]

You need to give "notice" I think at least a month before the wedding? This has to be done in your local registry office (which might be the same one you're getting married in).

Otherwise at the end of the all you need to really achieve is:

• ensure people know where and when it is happening
  
• make sure there's food and drink
  
• choose something to wear
  
• turn up on time!

[PixieofCatan]

tread Doves are next on my list ;)

Didn't think of the sales! I'll see if I can grab somebody to come shopping with me next week, I hate shopping but I'd rather go before the real Christmas rush starts!

We've told everybody who needs to know the date already, only about 20 people coming! I don't even know if we're going to bother with invites, if we did then they won't be anything elaborate!

We are getting bespoke rings so I'll need to get on that, thanks for the thought.

Flowers/bouquet I'll need to remember, got to decide if I'm knitting/crocheting them or not.

Thanks all :)

[TreadSoftlyOnMyDreams]

What kind of dress/outfit are you looking for?

[PixieofCatan]

I'm not 100% sure yet, probably not a traditional wedding dress though.

[kaykayred]

You have to register the wedding at LEAST two weeks before the ceremony. You book an appointment at your local registrar (at the town hall), and bring along copies of your passports. They will also ask you both questions separately to check basic information like your partners name, occupation and date of birth.

There is a fee of £35 per person when you give notice, which is payable on the day.

They will also give you a booklet which is filled with all the language options for the ceremony. You have to book a second appointment in order to discuss which wording options you have chosen.

For the booklet, there are few obligatory things you and your partner need to say during the ceremony in order for the wedding to be legal, but you can choose from three specific wording options (whichever you prefer).

Lots of civil wedding stuff is also completely optional, like the exchange of rings, etc, so you obviously have to let them know if you are planning on doing it, or skipping it. You also have to put down the names of your witnesses (although you can leave it a bit later if you want, it's just to make things go smoother on the day).

If you are getting married inside your own borough, then that's all you need to worry about. If you are getting married outside of your local borough (say you live in Camden but want to get married in Wimbledon), then you also need to reside in the residency in which you are marrying for a period of 9 days before giving notice. It's fucking ridiculous, and I have no idea why they make you do this. If this is applicable to you, then you have to provide evidence to them to show your residency requirement has been filled during your first appointment when you give notice.

There is also a registrar fee which you normally pay online, which is something like £350.