confused, feeling guilty, need some support - bit long sorry

[eggybrokenoff]

We're in a big muddle over weaning and don't really know how to get out of it! We EBF'd (with an occassional bottle of formula as I couldn't express) for 5.5 months. always intended to BLW at 6 months - ended up starting a little early as DS was showing signs of wanting it. The experience was not the fun nice one I was expecting. HAted him biting off huge pieces of food and gagging on them, spent all the time convinced he was about to choke. At the same time the pressure to give lots of food (from mum, friends etc) was mounting, and DS sleep was getting worse and worse. So I cracked and agreed to give lumpy purees. He's now being spoon fed commercial food 3 times a day, which has happened quickly. He's a bit constipated, it has made no difference to sleep, and I am so guilty that I might be hurting him, and that I'm undoing all the good work of struggling to breast feed for so long.

am I damaging him? where should I go next - back to BLW and deal with my fears, or stick with lumpy second stage type foods?

I know I'm completely overreacting, and that this shouldn't be such a big deal but for some reason it really is making me very anxious and upset. I just want to be confident I'm doing best by him

[Jic]

Hey stop beating yourself up. Don't worry just start giving him what you're having mashed up, just watch for salt and nuts and overly greasy stuff. Either mash it so it's lumpy or use a hand blender. You don't need to give him jars all the time, he'll be fine on whatever you're having. If BLW isn't for you then don't stress, the benefits of you bfding him will be lifelong so stop worrying about that, and relax. Jars are not evil, just use them when you're out or whewn you really need to. Good luck.

[FrameyMcFrame]

why are you using the second stage puree? Agree with jic, just puree stuff from your meals

[bluemousemummy]

Yes good advice from jic. I agree with you about the BLW thing, I understand and appreciate the theory but in practice I could never deal with the gagging either - just looked wrong to me. If he's constipated make sure he's getting enough fluids, breastmilk but also some cooled boiled water with his meals. Try to give him fresh food wherever possible but nothing wrong with jars occasionally. And don't beat yourself up about it! WHAT you feed your baby with is far far more important than HOW.

[eggybrokenoff]

thanks for the advice - will stick to some kind of cereal for breakfast then - maybe baby stuff for the iron, a bit of whatever for lunch - veg or some finger food if I'm having something, then whatever we eat for tea. i guess things like pie and risotto will be easy to turn into food for him. I think I really am getting too stressed about this!

and he's officially not constipated now - off to the nappy forums to ask advice on weaning and re-useables cos I'm not sure my washing machine is up to this!