We started with BLW and then chickened out because we worried DD wasn't actually consuming any food so ended up doing it the puree route. We have continued to give her finger food as well but it seems she is worse now (9m next week) than when she was 6mo. At 7m she could eat the best part of a finger of toast. Now she plays with it. She is ok with organix snacks like the biscuits and carrot sticks that look like wotsits etc and with fingers of cheese, but she is rubbish with toast and fruit. How can we help her become competent at feeding herself this way?
put in front of her, let her play with it, you get on with preparing the pureed food. sooner or later, she'll try it and like it. my ds (10 and a half months) preferred the organix sticks initially (and still would opt for those over veg), but he has gradually built up to eating anything put in front of him. (he started off doing the same - playing and then leaving it and crying)
have you tried unsalted butter on the toast? pitta bread cheese (gouda/edam can be easier for little ones as they don't crumble like cheddar) soft fruit - bananas, peaches, plums etc peas/sweetcorn (great for encouraging pincer grips). rice cakes
i wouldn't worry, she'll get there. i wouldn't stress too much.
you could try taking a bit from her tray and eating it with a big smile and exagerated 'yum yum'. babies imitate a lot.
DD went through phases (and still does at nearly 2!) of not managing/wanting to eat things she had been able/inclined to before!
I would just keep putting all sorts of things in front of her and she will eat what she wants when she's ready. It'll all work out in the end even though it doesn't feel like she'll ever eat at the time!