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I'm probably being neurotic but he's surely not eating enough [whimper]

(8 Posts)

DS is just over 12 months and still BFing (all the fecking time). We started off mostly BLW although DP (SAHD) does a lot of spooning these days.

In a day he will have maybe half a weetabix or a little teeny bit of porridge and a few mouthfuls of fruit and some natural yoghurt for breakfast, a few chews of a ricecake or something mid morning, lunch could be a few chews of a sandwich or leftover dinner with fruit, midafternoon probably fruit again and some pasta/meat and veg/risotto/whatever we have for dinner. He gets offered cows milk now but only takes a couple of oz at a time.

He BFs first thing (5am [pale]) and then before I go to work, lunchtime, teatime when I get in, bedtime, 11pm and then wakes again sometime between 11 and 1 when he comes into bed and feeds again.

I feel like he's relying heavily on BM, which is fine I guess, although I am tired, so tired now, and I am as sure as I can be that he would sleep better if he didn't feed to sleep so much. He uses BFing for comfort while teething (so, that's around 5 days in seven for the last 2 months anyway ) so I'm reluctant to withdraw it completely.

When we offer finger food, if I give him a 'soldier' of toast for example, he'll maybe take 1 or 2 bites then throw the rest away. Often he rejects soft food with fingers but will take the spoon, but after 2-3 mouthfuls he's batting us away. He's not great with a spoon himself but he has his own one for every meal (until it too gets chucked).

I want to be really laid back about it but feel stuck in a cycle of BFing - less food - hungry - more BFing etc etc.

whoisdoingthedishes Wed 06-Aug-08 11:21:01

I feel for you. My DD is just the same although she's only 8 months so I'm hoping it will get better.

How active is he? I'm guessing that sometimes they may feel too restricted in the high chair. Can you put food in an easy to reach place so your DS can "find it". My DD has done that recently, and I'm very impressed, she managed to chew through the skin of a banana! The bad thing is that then all the floor gets messy.

ChairmumMiaow Wed 06-Aug-08 19:53:21

DS is only 6 months but I can see similarities here.

He started off BLW at 23 weeks really eagerly, and then went off his solids almost entirely. Since then we've addressed his sleeping issues (drastically - see here for the long story - and literally overnight he's really really interested in his food!

Tonight he had fish, chips and peas. He takes the fish out of our breaded fish off our forks, eats the plain oven chips himself, and we stab a pea or two onto a fork prong and he munches it off! (its hilarious!)

Anyway, my point is that I saw you were having frequent wakings with your DS while co-sleeping, which is what we were doing a couple of weeks ago. I really didn't want to do what I have done (initiating nap routine, putting him in his own room and letting him CIO at bedtime) a couple of weeks ago, but it has worked so well and so quickly, that I'm a convert.

I know your DS is much older so things would be different in terms of getting him to sleep more solidly, but I just wanted to point out the correlation I'd found in case it helps you.

StealthPolarBear Wed 06-Aug-08 19:55:48

i'm in the same position with my 15mo

FabioFridgeFluffFrenzy Wed 06-Aug-08 19:57:55

'not eating enough'

If he is ill, listless, losing weight etc then maybe he isn't eating enough. Some children thrive on fresh air, some need refuelling hourly. Remove from your head what you consider enough food, and don't look at what's gone in, look at how he's responding to it iyswim.

The milk issue is common. He sounds like he's eating a good diet tbh. You could try varying when he has cows'/bm and food, to see if that makes a differenct. Do you eat with him, atthe table, and offer him your food?

RhinestoneCowgirl Wed 06-Aug-08 20:01:37


I posted on your other thread, sorry you're so knackered at the moment, must be really tough.

We had all sorts of sleep issues with DS and at times it seemed like he would never sleep. I posted in despair when he was about 15 months old that I was really resenting him feeding at night sad. However it has gradually improved and he is now 2 and (mostly) goes to sleep in his own cot no fuss and stays there until morning. This seemed so far away even a couple of months ago.

FWIW DS was always a pretty good eater of solid food from about 9/10 months, and I had high hopes that this would lead to sleeping thro. Err, not really, just so you know that there is not always a correlation.

The only thing that worked for me and DH at this point was just finding ways to survive, catching up on sleep where we could (taking turns for lie-ins at weekends etc). We did try night weaning at this age but DS just got hysterical, we had more success at about 15 months or so.

I'm sorry I can't offer more practical advice, but you sound like you're doing a fab job on v little sleep. Hope it gets better for you soon.

Thanks for the messages and ideas. I think I'm just having a flakey spell at the moment, DS is not being easy and seems really unsettled, and I feel tired and frazzled.

You make a good point Fabio. He's obviously slimmed down enormously since a couple of months back, but then he's incredibly active and almost walking. I haven't weighed him though. He seems bright enough, just restless and irritable. And crap at going to sleep.

I think when he walks it will be easier because we can give him snacky things to have 'on the go', whereas now he needs his hands for cruising. I think he finds staying still to eat really frustrating, as whois suggests, and therefore when he has free hands for carrying food he might eat better.

I promised myself I wouldn't stress about food!

zsos Wed 06-Aug-08 22:56:48

i found that my babe was not intosoft food but would only eat "adult" food even things like cottage cheese instead of yogurt, i thought she was a pickey eater but really she just didnt want baby food

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