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HV has suggested weaning my 19 week old, I am not comfortable with this idea but she isn't gaining weight, and I don't know what to do.

(42 Posts)
Elmosgirl Wed 30-Jul-08 10:56:57

My DD2 is 19 weeks old, she was born at 7lb 2oz and currently weighs 11lb 14oz at 19 weeks and is just dropping off the 2nd centile.

She is formula fed after not feeding at all well from birth and losing weight I was advised (probably badly) to stop breastfeeding.

She currently has 6-7 oz milk 5 times a day.

She is barely gaining any weight - 2oz last two weeks.

Today a HV (not my usual one) has said I should start solids, I am not at all comfortable with this idea at all, I was hoping to wait to 6 months and do BLW, she can not sit up yet, I don't think she seems hungry other than her milk, it just doesn't feel right for me 9alhtough I know plenty of people do feed their babies at this age.

BUT...she is not gaining weight, I will try upping her milk but not sure she will drink anymore, she seems satisfied on what she currently has.

My other HV said that I should see a GP and possibly a paediatrician if not good weight gain as she may have a problem absorbing the calories from the milk and a possibility of prescribed high calorie's HV said I would be wasting the GP's time if I took her too see them.

I need an outside view on this, I want to do what is best for my DD, but at the moment I don't know what this is.

misdee Wed 30-Jul-08 11:01:22

solids will not have any extra calories in it.

canyou increase her milk feeds at all.

i would maybe speak to the GP about this, it would not be wasting his/her time at all.

stupid HV!

Sazisi Wed 30-Jul-08 11:01:45

Dont' listen to this HV.
Wasting the GP's time??? shock That's a crap thing to say.
Go to your GP, see what they think. You need to find out why DD2 isn't gaining weight.

giddly Wed 30-Jul-08 11:02:05

I think you need to see GP. This is not good advice: starting solids is unlikey improve her weight gain. She will get very little calories from solids initially but will probably cut down further on her milk (which will continue to be her main source of calories for some time to come)

fymandbean Wed 30-Jul-08 11:02:20

I can see the immediate problem is you would start her on veg and baby rice which are LOWER in calories than milk! My DS dropped down a centile when I started weaning him. I personally would seek advice from a specialist to find out if there was a problem... She may just be destined to be petite BUT you need to make sure.

FabioThatFirggingCat Wed 30-Jul-08 11:05:52

I think what you should do is ignore the HV. See your GP about her weight gain if you're worried - HVs are infamous for being ignorant loons, sadly. Always ask for the evidence for any advice you're given.

muppetgirl Wed 30-Jul-08 11:06:43

Personally I would always see the GP if you are at all worried about your lo and it sounds like you are. You have been asked to make a drastic change in your dd diet that goes against current guidlines for the reason that she's not gainning weight -not starving hungry, not that she's not satisfied etc. Both my ds's weight gain slowed dramatically when they were weaned and this could happen to your lo just at the time when she is needing the extra calories.

Make an app with your GP, if they are unsure ask for a referral to a paediatrician.

StarlightMcKenzie Wed 30-Jul-08 11:08:08

Message withdrawn

Elmosgirl Wed 30-Jul-08 11:13:15

Thanks everyone, I was surprised she suggested weaning (baby rice) as I know milk has more calories, she also said to feed in her boucy chair, which again I thought was a no no as they should be upright.

Anyway have booked a appointment with GP for this afternoon, your right I am worried and would like a second opinion.

She may well just be a small one...which is fine, she is happy and alert but it is the constant dropping of centiles that worries me, she wasn't tiny at birth but is very small for her age now.

I will try upping her milk but I really don't think she is hungry enough to take more, she always leaves a small amount in her bottle and seems satisfied til her next meal.

Any other opinions very welcome though, is so hard to have a clear opinion when it is your own child.

muppetgirl Wed 30-Jul-08 11:14:25

In fact, just to let you know my ds 2 ( 40 weeks) has been ill for just over a week and lost a lb in weight so I have reduced his food intake and upped his milk so he can put back on what he's lost...
He's happy with finger foods after his milk.

muppetgirl Wed 30-Jul-08 11:15:12

Good news re the app! Let us know how you get on xx

VictorianSqualor Wed 30-Jul-08 11:16:03

Solids will not increase intake of calories.
If anything weight gain drops when starting weaning.

The research behind weaning shows that when born baby's stomachs are permeable, to allow them to absorb the milk easier to digest. Only milk should be entering the stomach when it is permeable to avoid possible allergies or stomach/digestion problems in later life.

Somewhere between 17-26 weeks the stomach becomes unpermeable, and 'seals' which is when the baby is physically internally ready for solids. Unfortunately we can't tell which baby is ready at 17 weeks, and which is ready at 26! That's why they say to wait.

It has been suggested though, that once your baby can sit unaided, grab food, put it in their mouth, chew and swallow that they are likely to be ready internally, until then nature wouldn't allow us to be developmentally ready and we would fail at some point in the process.

If I were you I'd relay this information to the HV as to why you don't want to wean early and tell her that if she really thinks you need to see a paed you'll be happy to, and book an apt to see your GP. If your baby won't take any more milk (I'd say try adding in an extra fed somewhere first) then the higher calorie formula may help but weaning really is not the answer, the woman is obviously daft as a brush.

VictorianSqualor Wed 30-Jul-08 11:17:02

X post (takes so long typing one handed and deleting DS2's attempts at typing grin)

Glad you've got the GP apt.

Baffy Wed 30-Jul-08 11:18:20

Really good post VS

VictorianSqualor Wed 30-Jul-08 11:21:29

I'll let you into a secret baffy


I've typed the middle three paragraphs out so many times on here I actually have it saved to a word.doc to pastegrin

littleducks Wed 30-Jul-08 11:21:54

Glad that you have an appointement, your opening line should be "XX, the HV, said i would be wasting your time but i would like to discuss my dds weight gain as others have suggested she may require special formula" then whatever his professional opinion is to prescribing the formula he should hopefully give your hv a bollocking.

Elmosgirl Wed 30-Jul-08 11:28:33

VictorianSqualor I agree 100% with your post, is exactly how I feel babies should be weaned, I have read many of you posts (stalker) and agree completely with your feelings on weaning.

I feel very very uncomfortable with the fact I have now been advised to give baby rice....I KNOW it goes against everything I feel to be right I don't want to question this either but when I see her little dots in her red book just dropping and dropping is hard to think clearly.

Thank you everyone for confirming what i already knew. I hope the GP isn't as rubbish as todays HV and just says up milk....can I just ask for a paed referral and they will do it if i'm not happy with what he/she says or will they only do it if they think it is needed.

I'm sure our GP is fantastic but would rather speak with someone who knows more about babies.

VictorianSqualor Wed 30-Jul-08 11:32:41

If your GP doesn't give the advice you are hoping for you can always say 'With respect, I'd like a second opinion, could you refer me to a paediatrician that specialises in this sort of case, only it's really important to me not to wean before 26 weeks and I really don't think I can get DD to take any more milk"

Then whilst you wait for an appointment try and squeeze in a bit more milk.
How are night feeds going? Does she sleep through yet or still wake?

Elmosgirl Wed 30-Jul-08 11:35:59

She doesn't feed at all at night and hasn't done for weeks, she goes to bed at 7pm and wakes any time between 4.30 and 6.30 for her first feed. Then has 5 feeds, she feeds every 3 hours during the day.

VictorianSqualor Wed 30-Jul-08 11:37:56

Would you be able to add a dream feed at around 10:30-11 o'clock?
Not all babies will take one, DS certainly won't but if she did it could help you get that bit of extra milk into her.

PussinJimmyChoos Wed 30-Jul-08 11:38:12

Anyone else sick of HV spouting crap?? I know there are good ones out there but on the whole, a large number of the seem to be obsessed with their charts and their centiles and far too quick to suggest topping up with formula or introducing solids they get bonuses if children under their care stay on the centiles or something!!! angry

Elmosgirl Wed 30-Jul-08 11:41:14

Yes I could try a dream feed, I doubt she would take much. To be honest though I hate the idea of waking her, she obviously isn't hungry or she would wake.....wouldn't she?

PussinJimmyChoos Wed 30-Jul-08 11:43:19

My DS never woke for his dream feed - just guzzled it down peacefully and didn't even need winding - it was the best feed of the day! Try it for a few nights and see what happens. She'll soon let you know if she doesn't want it - DS did and thats when we started to drop it

VictorianSqualor Wed 30-Jul-08 11:47:23

If she doesn't want it she'll keep her mouth clamped tight and move her head away, believe me, no amount of trying would get DS2 to take a dream feed, I know others who it has worked great for.

It would also be helpful if you'd at least tried before seeing a specialist (if you get the referral, which I'd be inclined to ask for either way tbh) that you could show how you'd tried getting more milk into her per day but that she really didn't want it.

Elmosgirl Wed 30-Jul-08 11:51:04

Yes good point. Will give it a go tonight when I go to bed, thanks everyone, is so helpful to get other peoples views.

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