Forced to wean. Advice? Help?(3 Posts)
Hi mumsnetters!! Hoping I can get some advice and support on this one!!
My bubs is 14 months old and up until 2 days ago, still happily breast feeding (to the slight annoyance if SO)
Originally I wasn't going to breastfeed. I'm Irish and it's not a big thing in Ireland at all. Kind of the polar opposite to the UK. I ended up breastfeeding for a number of reasons and the rest is history. But here's the problem: I can't stop. When she was 6 months old she stopped taking expressed milk from a bottle. I didn't mind cause I love the bond I have with her but I kind of built a rod for my own back because now I'm the one who always gets her at night because I have the boobs
She's a horrible sleeper and SO insists it's because she wakes up expecting to be fed because when she does wake up I immediately feed her (I can't listen to her cry and it gets her to sleep quickly so in my eyes it's a win/win) .
We tried weaning before but she is such a strong willed baby and throws proper tantrums (which I hate to admit make me feel guilty). She's now getting to the age that she's not a baby anymore and me giving into her tantrums is doing more harm than good. We've spoken about weaning and although I'd continue feeding if I could for convenience, I know that it's getting to be time to do it.
As faith would have it, 2 days ago I ended up in hospital and they had to keep me in. I was panicked because my DD's schedule would be completely messed and she'd be a nightmare. I couldn't express milk because of the pain meds I was on so on such short notice I told SO to go to the shop and buy some cows milk. Set him with instructions for when to give it at night and all the rest.
The first night was ok. She woke up 3 times, only drank about 2 oz but went back to sleep after it and woke up once again after that.
Last night she woke up once at 4.30am for a bottle, which she gulped down, and slept until 8.40 this morning.
I'm actually in shock, she's never slept that well before and I hate to admit that it looks like I'm the reason she wakes up so much (expecting to be fed). I'm due to go home today but I'm a bit worried that by me being back in the house she'll revert to her old ways. I'd love to continue BF but I think that if I do feed her she'll just cancel out taking a bottle all over again and it'll be back to square one.
Admittedly this isn't the way I would have liked to wean but she seems to be ok with it. What do I do? Do I just let daddy take over tonight in the hopes that she'll see that even when I'm home this is the way it's got to be?
I should also mention that I'm supposed to be going home to Ireland for a visit on Tuesday with her alone and to be honest it would obviously be a lot easier if she wasn't waking up a lot at night to be fed.
I don't have any other mum friends who've BF so any advice would be so great!
Ok, there's lots going on here!
Do you feed her during the day? Does she drink cows milk during the day?
She's obviously used to feeding to sleep, which is fine if you don't mind, but it sounds like it's causing you problems now. If your SO is keen to stop her feeding at night, then I would enlist his help. He can settle her at night without giving milk, because it's not about needing milk in the night like a new born. He can do whatever it takes to settle her without giving milk, until that's what she's used to. You can continue to feed during the day, night weaning doesn't have to mean the end of breastfeeding altogether.
Also, there are lots of helpful posters in the Infant Feeding topic, as this topic is about introducing food rather than stopping breastfeeding ifyswim. Maybe try posting on their as well.
Thank you for your reply!
We actually agreed to have him put her to sleep on his own tonight like he has been doing so I made myself scarce. She went down quick enough which was great but well see what tonight brings.
And thanks for the tip on where to post, I'm a newbie so hadn't a clue where to go
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