baby about to turn one - no longer just for fun - argh

[crouchendparent]

My baby girl will be one this week. I did babyled weaning with her, as I did with my older boy, and am finding it much more stressful this time around. DS took to it within a week or two and by 1 was having a small bottle of milk twice a day, scoffing as much as he could cram in, etc etc.

DD, on the other hand, ate almost nothing til 9 months (not a problem, I realise not everyone is as greedy enthusiastic about food as DS!) then since then has been really erratic about how much/what she eats. She still has 4 bottles of formula a day and will often go several meals in a row without having more than a mouthful or two of solids. The only thing she will consistently eat is bread - which obviously I'm reluctant to give her lots of. I'm not convinced that it's because she doesn't like the food, as she often won't eat things one day that she ate the day before (she had mounds of grapes for breakfast on sunday, for example, having completely refused any on Saturday).

It's totally stressing me out. She seems OK developmentwise, she babbles away, points at stuff in her books and if she wants something, can walk halfway across a room etc etc - she's between 25th and 50th centile which is kind of what she has always been. But what the hey is going on? Why won't she eat? She has had three spoonfuls of carrot soup, 1/4 of a bagel, and a mouthful of porridge since yesterday lunchtime - as well as her milk - I just can't imagine that that's nearly enough?

[Flisspaps]

Have you tried cutting out some of the milk - she might not be hungry as she's filling up on milk.

Also, as with everything 1 is just a guideline and if developmentally she's ok then I wouldn't worry too much :) Babies and little children are very good at regulating their own appetites, she may never be a big eater, or perhaps just prefers to graze than eating a whole meal.

[crouchendparent]

Hi flisspaps

I have thought about cutting out milk, and have even tried giving her solid breakfast before morning milk, but to no avail - she didn't eat anything, but became gradually grumpier until her mid-morning milktime! Weep.

I guess I am having all these extreme ideas about having a child who will only eat yellow food or ends up on a feeding tube or something - I don't know any other babies who are like mine, so it's hard to maintain perspective!

[VeronicaCake]

Maybe the problem is your children are at two extremes. Your son was an extremely early convert to solids, and your daughter is a late convert. Both are normal. Nothing you describe sounds worrying, but if you are constantly comparing your DD to your DS it will seem odd.

If you compare it to my DD who is somewhere in the middle she doesn't sound so bad. DD was a very erratic eater from 6-12m, but still an enthusiastic consumer of breastmilk. She was still having 4-6 breastfeeds a day at 12m, but she probably ate more solid food than your DD. She had a big growth spurt around 13m and suddenly laid in to the solids. I stopped bf-ing at 13.5m and she stopped drinking milk out of a bottle at the same time. At 15m she has a small cup of milk before bed and normally eats a smallish breakfast, a moderate lunch and a big tea.

DD's appetite is also affected by the heat at the mo which may explain why your daughter is preferring to fill up on liquids.

[crouchendparent]

That's so immensely reassuring - I have been wondering about the heat, as well. She also has a bit of a cold so I guess that could affect her appetite. I think as you say, Veronica, I'm comparing DS and DD all the time - a cold, or the weather, or wild horses wouldn't keep him away from food! I'm really glad to hear she's not completely abnormal in her eating.

I'll try to stop stressing - I imagine that's absolutely the worst thing I could possibly do at this stage! Thanks very much!

[Trillian42]

I could have written the same post - in fact I think I did write something remarkably similar! DD is now almost 14months and the change in her is huge in the last couple of months. I wouldn't stress about it for another month - she's obviously thriving on milk. What I have noticed with DD is that she's better when we're eating at the same time, and apparently at the childminders she eats loads when the other kids are eating. I also let her play with toys at the table and then pop in the odd spoon.

Actually just remembered, the first thing I did was to ditch the high chair for meals. I would sit on the floor and eat some weetabix or whatever and she'd get curious and pop over for a spoon. I also stopped putting on bibs as I think she sensed my stress about mealtimes and associated bibs & the high chair with me being anxious. I wasn't trying to force feed her or anything, but like you was worried. She might have just grown out of it herself, but it coincided with me trying these things so might be worth a shot?

[Albrecht]

Ds is 13 months tomorrow and hardly eats. Its gradually improved but he still actually consumes very little solid food, a few bites here and there.

He's bf and now often does not have any milk between mid morning and bedtime. And he eats least solid food at dinner and most at breakfast after he's had a massive milk feed (plus all his night feeds...). So basically I can't wait to tell my hv that actually its not the milk that is the problem.

I've tried nearly every food you can imagine, always atleast me eating with him, really tried not to stress in front of him, let him make a mess, eating sat on the floor etc etc. Its just how he is.